


My Romance Paperwork

by purbleazaleya



Category: Daft Punk
Genre: Anger Management, BDSM, Control Issues, Eating Disorders, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-10
Updated: 2015-05-10
Packaged: 2018-03-29 22:03:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 65,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3912265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purbleazaleya/pseuds/purbleazaleya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Guy-Manuel is an intern at Thomas' family's company and they fall in love. Guy-Manuel has many issues and Thomas only seems to be trying to help him. Or is he? Thomas seems so be hiding something sinister, and Guy-Manuel really is dumbfounded</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Romance Paperwork

**Author's Note:**

> So I decided to upload the complete version of this! This story may have triggers for anybody with eating disorders or has been in an abusive relationship. You have been warned!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 1: THIS OVERWHELMING DESIRE**

Guy-Manuel shifted uncomfortably on his seat, anxious and wanting to get out of there as soon as possible. His friends, Pharrell and Pedro were out partying and dancing somewhere on the dance floor, leaving Guy-Manuel sitting alone at their booth. He had not wanted to come along, but somehow both his flat mates managed to talk him into coming along.

He sighed, resting his chin on his hand, absorbing the loud techno sounds and bright strobes in the club. In his mind he knew that his friends were only trying to help him, to get him out of his shell that he refused to come out of. See, the problem with Guy-Manuel was that he was notoriously shy, and though he liked music and dancing, he limits his dancing to the living room of his flat due to his shyness.

He also had a tendency to like other boys, which made it more difficult for him to ever voice out his desires due to his overwhelming fear of rejection from the other party. The club that they were in was an explicitly gay club, as Pharrell had to joyously said, “Now you don’t have to worry if the other guy likes guys too or not, cause if they are there, they do.”

“Yup, no excuse for you to not get out there and get yourself laid for once”, Pedro had added, much to Guy-Manuel’s chagrin. His friends tended to think he was a bad boy, but he was actually so shy and reclusive, with zero confidence, thus he had never have a boyfriend he wanted to make love to. Pathetic, he knew, a 21 year old virgin who only had one boyfriend before, in high school.

His friends had wanted to party the night away at a club, and decided that tonight was the night that Guy-Manuel was going to follow them and enjoy himself, even if they had to drag him kicking and screaming to the club. Thus, the results, they dancing and partying while he was sitting there alone, nursing his drink.

‘Merde…. I have unfinished assignments and a whole lots of studying to do….not to mention preparing for my job interviews for my internship’, Guy-Manuel thought, launching himself into a full blast panic mode. He huffed, wanting to find his friends and tell them he wanted to go home, but he was too scared of the crowd to move.

He sighed, resigning himself to more waiting. A group of people caught his eye, looks like a group of girls dancing with a guy. The guy was tall, with dark hair and dancing with ease. ‘Man, the guy has moves’; Guy-Manuel mused to himself. Suddenly, the guy, as if noticing being stared at, stopped and looked at Guy-Manuel. He immediately looked away, ashamed for being caught staring so blatantly.

The guy with moves continued on dancing, but he kept on glancing towards Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel felt uncomfortable with all the attention and kept his gaze low on his table. As time passed by, people started leaving, and the fewer crowds made it easier for the tall guy to stare unabashed at Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel, shy as he was, squirmed under the scrutiny.

A waitress came over to him, passing a blue colored drink, making Guy-Manuel confused. “It’s from that gentleman there”, she said seeing Guy-Manuel’s puzzled expression. He followed the direction the waitress was pointing to, much to his horror, there was Mr. Tall, talking to a friend while staring at Guy-Manuel with a sultry look on his face.

“Shit, I’m done for”, Guy-Manuel whispers under his breath. The waitress moves away, leaving Guy-Manuel to his drink. He was halfway through the tropical blue drink when he saw Mr. Tall walking over to his booth. Guy-Manuel panics even more, his chest tightening and frantically looking at how he can still escape, coming up with zero solutions. Mr. Tall was at his booth now. “Allo, gorgeous, wanna dance a while with me?”

Guy-Manuel blasts into supreme panic flustered mode.

**************

Thomas came to the club tonight looking for a good time. His friend, Laurent, was commissioned to be the dj here for tonight and Laurent had invited Thomas to come accompany him. A dj himself, though only part time due to his studies, Thomas had taken the opportunity to de stress and let go.

Dancing the night away, Thomas was surrounded by a group of his friends who were girls, swaying away to the beat in a group. Thomas, a charismatic and confident young man, exuded style the way he knew best and was an instant hit at the dance floor. And when he was lost in his dance moves, he saw what made his day.

A young man, younger than him was sitting at a booth, alone, looking like he would rather endure hell than to be there at the time. A young man who looked gorgeous as hell. Thomas instantly felt want fill his mind, want which made him stare on at the guy’s face. And at one point he looked up. Thomas felt his breath leave him.

The young man had a face with delicate features, giving him an almost angelic, boyish visage. He saw that he was uncomfortable, probably shy of being under Thomas’ scrutiny. ‘He looks so cute…a shy one I guess’, he mused.  Thomas instantly made up his mind. He wanted to bring that home to bed with him tonight, wanted to see that shy flustered man squirm beneath him, panting and wanting, needy for him.

Thomas really was one person who dominated and acquired all that he wanted. Being one who was raised by business tycoons, trained to be a businessman since birth, he was one who confidently sought after all that he desired with reverence and took it all for himself. His sex life was no different too, judging by the girls and boys that he had seduced and dominated in the bedroom.

And now he had his sights on the young man at that booth.

He went to the bar, ordering a fresh and tropical cocktail. The waitress, Jeanette, was a friend of his, and no stranger to his somewhat Casanova ways. “Jean, I need a favor. See the boy with long brown hair there?” Thomas points towards the booth. Jeanette nods with an amused look on her face, asking, “Drink for your new conquest?”

 Thomas gives a toothy grin and nods, while Jeanette shakes her head in disbelieve. “I think that’s a no go, Tommy Thom, that boy looks notoriously shy and introverted.” Thomas gave a smirk and told Jeanette to pass the drink anyway. He saw Jeanette going there, the confused then panicked look on his interest’s face and Jeanette walking back with a smirk on her face.

Thomas felt an extremely strong pull in his stomach, a yearning so strong he could not resist, an itch he could not help but scratch. But Thomas knew that he needed to proceed with extreme caution here, for fear he may scare away his already scared looking sweetheart.

He made up his mind and hopped of the stool, muttering a quick “Wish me luck” to Jeanette and walking confidently towards his target. He saw the young man looking more and more panicked, as though he was a frightened animal trapped in a corner. ‘Don’t worry, darling, you can’t escape me now’ Thomas heard him telling himself.

Reaching the booth, the young man looked up at him, revealing beautiful blue eyes with long curly eyelashes which gave him that beautiful doe-eyed look. Thomas felt the pull in his stomach strengthened. . “Allo, gorgeous, wanna dance a while with me?”

He sees the panic on the young man’s face, he quiet for a long time before stuttering out, “I-I do-don’t think…”, trailing off before completing his answer, blushing madly. ‘Man, he’s making me go mad’, Thomas thought to himself, finding himself wanting the guy more and more. “Look, sweetheart, I don’t bite, so you don’t have to worry. It’s just a dance, and it’s better than sitting here all alone anyway.”

Guy-Manuel hears Mr. Tall, feeling shy and flustered. Figuring he would just have a dance then scramble anyway, before Mr. Tall can do anything to him, he answered, in a low tone, “Ok.” Thomas felt elated, he offered his hand, Guy-Manuel took it and then Thomas was leading him to a comfy spot to dance on the dance floor.

 Thomas found a spot he liked, turned around and started dancing. Guy-Manuel just watched Thomas move in front of him, marveling at how easily Thomas was moving to the beat. “Dance with me, babe”, Thomas said suddenly, holding Guy-Manuel’s hips and moving them in sync with the beat. Guy-Manuel noticed that he had suddenly come to close to Thomas’ body.

Thomas, sensing Guy-Manuel’s discomfort, rubbed him thumb in circles on Guy-Manuel’s hipbone, mouthing “relax, babe”, moving Guy-Manuel in sync with him and the beat. Guy-Manuel felt himself relax and began to move on his own. After a while, Thomas let go of his hips to move his hands to the small of Guy-Manuel’s back, pulling him closer.

They were so close now; Thomas could feel Guy-Manuel’s breath on his neck. It gave him jitters. He was staring shamelessly at Guy-Manuel’s face, looking at his sweet pink lips and wondering how they would taste like, while Guy-Manuel, shy, kept his gaze on the ground beneath him. Just about when Thomas wanted to tilt Guy-Manuel’s head up and kiss those pink, luscious lips, he heard a voice call out to somebody.

“Hey, Guy-Manuel, who ya’ dancing with?”

Guy-Manuel turned and saw Pharrell standing there, looking surprised and beaming at him. “Oh, just someone who asked me for a dance”, he told Pharrell. Pharrell smiled brightly at him and said, “Pedro and me are gonna take a while more, gotta’ meet some old friends. Sa have fun dancing!” and scrambled out of there as fast as possible. Guy-Manuel cursed under his breath, knowing that Pharrell is going to delay on purpose so that Guy-Manuel will dance longer.

‘So his name is Guy-Manuel’, Thomas was articulating and keeping this information for future use. Seeing Guy-Manuel lost in thought, he moved forward and held Guy-Manuel from behind. He felt Guy-Manuel tense up at the contact again. “Relax, babe, relax”, he whispered into Guy-Manuel’s ear and wrapped his arms around Guy-Manuel’s stomach, moving him to the beat slowly again.

They danced like that, Guy-Manuel’s smaller frame fitting comfortably into Thomas’ front, moving together slowly. Thomas was going crazy, inhaling the scent of Guy-Manuel’s long chocolate hair, and deciding to be bolder, bit on Guy-Manuel’s ear then kissed it. Hearing Guy-Manuel moan at that, he decided to go further and nuzzle into his neck, leaving butterfly kisses down he column of his throat.

Guy-Manuel felt too hot, he was sure his face would be all red by now, embarrassed by his reaction to Mr. Tall’s ministrations. Somewhere in the back of his mind he felt that remembered a plan to scramble or something, to run away, but his mind as hazing over with desire and that part of his mind was becoming increasingly inaccessible.

Guy-Manuel felt Thomas breath on his cheek and he turned his face slowly. Thomas seeing the opportunity latched his own lips to Guy-Manuel’s, tasting those plump lips. Guy-Manuel moaned, and Thomas took that opportunity to slip his tongue inside. Guy-Manuel’s knees almost buckled. Thomas’ tongue was in licking into his mouth, tasting him and mapping the soft cavern of his mouth.

Thomas was reveling in the taste, it was better than he could ever imagine. He broke apart, needing air, then looking at Guy-Manuel’s face. Guy-Manuel opened his eyes and Thomas held his gaze, the tension deliciously electric between them. The moment was broken however, when Laurent called out to Thomas.

“Yo, Thomas, the club is gonna close in ten, then we can leave.” Guy-Manuel suddenly snapped from whatever trance he was in, suddenly realizing how he was in Thomas’ arms, pushed himself slowly out of Thomas’ embrace and took two steps back to put some distance between himself and Thomas. He cursed himself, wondering how he let himself behave like that when he was not the kind of person to just randomly kiss strangers in clubs.

Meanwhile, Thomas was cursing Laurent, knowing that his sweetheart was gonna make a run for it. He just knew from the look on Guy-Manuel’s face. True enough, a moment later, Guy-Manuel said “Since the club is gonna close, I need to find my friends, if not I can’t go home. Thanks for the dance.” Guy-Manuel was out of there before Thomas could protest.

“Damm you, Laurent!” was all Thomas could say as he walked back to the bar, annoyed.

In the ride back home, Guy-Manuel was bombarded with hoots and questions from his flat mates. “You had a hot kiss with a stranger!” “Damm, the way he was looking at you, I swear he would have taken you right there and then if he could!” “Hooray for Guy-Man, he’s getting the cute guys at the clubs!”

Honestly told, Guy-Manuel was rather embarrassed by the whole thing and wished those two would just leave it alone. They were so shocked when they found out that Guy-Manuel scrammed without even asking Mr. Tall his name, much less his number. “It’s a rare occasion, guys, won’t happen again”, Guy-Manuel announced, much to Pedro’s exasperation.

He showered, changed into his pajamas and fell into bed, just wanting to sleep. But then, he touched his lips gently, remembering the feel of Mr. Tall’s lips again his own, his tongue on his. A blush spread across Guy-Manuel’s cheeks. But then he shrugged it off and closed his eyes, falling into dreams about a tall boy who danced beneath the bright lights in a club.

Not so far away, at the other corner of town, Thomas was cursing himself for not trying to get Guy-Manuel’s phone number. He could have asked that black boy who came looking for Guy-Manuel, he looked eager enough to hook his friend up. Thomas sighed and turned in his bed swearing if he ever saw Guy-Manuel again, he would not let him go. He smiled as he recalled the feel of Guy-Manuel’s body against his, and how shy he was.

**********

Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months and three months had passed since that incident at the club. Between studying for his exams applying for an internships then preparing for the interviews, Guy-Manuel had completely forgotten about his Mr. Tall. Guy-Manuel got an internship at Hubgreen Tech, a company renowned in green technology engineering, perfect for Guy-Manuel’s chemical engineering major.

His first day, he was so nervous, having ransacked his closet the day before, frantically looking for an outfit. The next day, he arrived at the chemical department of Hubgreen, learning that he was the only intern there this summer, something that further aggravated his nervousness. His seniors were all friendly though, often teasing him for being so timid.

The head of department, Elizabeth Hunning, or Ellie was a bubbly woman who gave him a warm welcome. The team he was working with for the duration of his four month internship was small, and they got acquainted fast. By the third day, they were all comfy with each other. Comfy enough that is, to gossip about the bosses and their kid over coffee and muffins at tea break.

“You know the owners of this company, Daniel and Mary Bangalter, right?” one of the engineers, Sebastien asked Guy-Manuel. He nodded. “Why what about them?” Emma, another one of his coworker asked. “Apparently, their son, Thomas has started coming to office. Mr. Bangalter and missus are planning to retire in about five years and they are training him, so…” Sebastien trailed of. “What’s wrong with that?”, Sam, yet another coworker asked. “Everyone expected Thomas to take over someday, it was totally expected”, he added.

“Apparently Thomas is a very charismatic and efficient businessman, I am quite curious to see him. He will be visiting the chemical branch of the engineering sector, our branch tomorrow. Ellie is asking us to be on our best behavior and be good little people tomorrow”, Sebastien trailed on. Valarie, the oldest on the team at fivety six, huffed, “Yeah, we don’t know if he’s a snobbish lil’ kid of nicey nice yet so we better not crack jokes like we do with our boss yet.”

Sam clapped his hands, saying, “So, nice attire and completely serious, matured behavior tomorrow. Got it.” Guy-Manuel gave a little laugh with the others, sipping on his tea slowly and eating his blueberry muffin. That night, Guy-Manuel picked out his attire and supplies for the next day, like he does every night before calling up home and having a little chat with his parents and little brother.

He noticed that he missed his family and his family home in the countryside. He missed arguing with his younger brother, Paul and eating his mother’s pies. But, Guy-Manuel knew that he had to come out here to study and work eventually. They were comfortable, normal average classed people, so Guy-Manuel going to university and studying to become an engineer was something they were extremely proud of.

When he went to sleep that night, he slept peacefully through the night. Little that he knows that the dawn brings a big change in his life and this is the last peaceful sleep he will be having in a long time.

*********

Guy-Manuel arrived at work the next morning to see everybody jittery and nervous. He was nervous too, to be honest. To what he gathered, the boss’s son, Thomas Bangalter was twenty five, four years elder to him, and had studied green technology with a business minor at a prestigious university and graduated with top results too. A charismatic, confident, intelligent and handsome young man. 

Guy-Manuel never expected what happened at morning tea. Bangalter junior had decide to join then at morning tea, and when he heard Ellie’s charade of “Good morning, good morning and welcome”, he knew the much awaited figure had arrived. “You have an intern here, I heard?”, Guy-Manuel heard a deep voice asking.

“Yes, yes we do. And a very bright one, too, sir.” Valerie said while pulling Guy-Manuel to the front. When Guy-Manuel saw who Thomas Bangalter was exactly, he got the shock of his life. He gasped in surprise, memories from before jumping to the front of his mind. The other man looked just as surprised but it looked like a good surprise to him because he looked delighted. “Well well well, our intern, I guess?” he asked.

*******

When Thomas joined the company, his father had told him that he was to go visit all the staff and acquaint himself with the head of departments. It was a huge company, so it was quite a chore. Visiting the engineering department was something he thought would be boring, being an engineer himself and suffering studying it for five years at uni.

He braced himself as he was welcomed by the over enthusiastic head of department, a plump woman in her forties. He saw all old people there and immediately felt like running out of the room to spare himself of their long droning talks. That when he remembered something. This department had an intern in their third year of studies. So he inquires and a kind looking lady pulls a short, brown haired boy forward.

The shock he felt was overwhelming. Since that night at the club, he had forgotten about him and the frustration he felt at not being able to see his angelic, shy sweetheart again, but here he was, an intern at his parent’s, no, HIS company. Seeing him brought back that blast of desire, strong and undiluted in the pit of his stomach.

 Guy-Manuel will not escape him this time, he wowed to himself. The boy will be his to kiss, to hold and be in his bed with him, his in every sense, his and his alone. The kind lady began introducing him, “This is Guilliaume Emmanuel Paul de Homem-Christo, but no one has the time for that, so most people just call him Guy-Manuel.”

“Well, Guy-Manuel”, Thomas drawls out the name, tasting the way it rolls off his tongue, “my name is Thomas Bangalter. I guess you can call me Thomas since Mr. Bangalter generally refers to my dad.” Thomas sticks out his hand, waiting for Guy-Manuel to hold it with his own and shake it. He does, although he does not look up at Thomas.

“Well, Guy-Manuel”, Thomas says as he shakes his hand, making Guy-Manuel look up at him, “I hope we can be well acquainted with each other.” Guy-Manuel knew what that innocent sounding line promised, it promised of Thomas’ want of him and how Thomas was going to pursue him. The promise of more to come. Guy-Manuel just smiled up at Thomas, hiding his trepidation and turmoil inside.

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 2: MY PRECIOUS IS HIDING**

Thomas was on cloud nine the rest of the day. He could not believe his luck; it was almost too much of a coincidence to be true. His best friend, Julian Casablancas was perplexed, seeing Thomas walking around the office with that shit eating grin on his face all day long. Earlier, Thomas had strode right into his office, grabbed his shoulder and whispered to him, “You know, I think that somehow, I am going to get lucky. Wish me luck in the game of love, Jules”, before walking right out, whistling merrily.

 

Julian’s parents were one of the shareholders and founders of Hubgreen, along with Thomas parents, thus they were on the board of directors. Also the reason why Julian and Thomas were best of friends, they bonded over music and the pressure their parents put on them, being the heirs to their multi-billion company. Julian studied business at university and as soon as he graduated, was put to work at the Human Resource department of the company, same as Thomas had to work with his dad now.

 

Knowing Thomas for so long, he knew that this was very odd behavior for Thomas, talking about getting lucky and love of all things. Julian sighed and rubbed his tired eyes. Thomas definitely did not need any help to “get lucky”, it was no secret that Thomas was getting plenty at bed without needing any help at all. Julian had always been envious of how Thomas was so comfortable with himself, being bisexual and not caring whatever anybody had to say about it, instead picking up a multitude of girls and boys to have one night stands with.

 

And given this behavior, Thomas was not really a fan of love, only lust and gratification. ‘Guess cupid finally struck him’, Julian thought to himself as he cleared his table before switching off the lights and locking his office. He found Thomas waiting on a couch at the lobby for him.

 

Thomas was replaying today’s morning tea incident over and over again in his mind. After re-discovering his sweetheart, he was brought along for a tour of the department. Somehow, Guy-Manuel managed to escape him through the tour. Well, the head of department was the one giving him the tour, what was her name? Elizabeth…giving Guy-Manuel the perfect opportunity to hide behind others while Thomas was forced to remain at the front, pretending to be the least bit interested with whatever the lady was telling him.

 

Then came morning tea. Guy-Manuel, much to Thomas’ disappointment, did not once look up to meet his gaze. He longed to look at those beautiful, vivid blue eyes. His hair was covering his face, like a fibrous curtain, shielding from Thomas’ prying eyes. Thomas could not think of any way to have a conversation with Guy-Manuel without seeming rude, or suspicious, so he just let it go. Eventually, tea time came to an end and he had to go to the next department to continue his sweep of the engineering faculty.

 

Not without leaving his shy angel flustered and blushing though.

 

Just as he was about to leave, he hung around behind as the others moved to the front. Guy-Manuel did not notice that he was left behind alone with Thomas as he was persistently reading from a piece of paper pasted on the wall. Sensing his long awaited opportunity, he moved close to Guy-Manuel, behind him to be exact, and gave him a light touch to his shoulder, just enough to gain his attention. When he looked back at Thomas, Thomas winked and moved his hand to grope his ass. Guy-Manuel yelped and his face turned pink as Thomas gave him a flying kiss and waltzed out of the cramped place.

 

Thomas had went to the department after working hours, finding his sweetheart, but he was nowhere to be seen. Thomas waned to ask if he was still inside, but doing so would cause suspicion as to why he was so interested in finding Guy-Manuel, so he refrained from doing so. His father would not appreciate him blatantly flirting with one of the interns, in fact he could almost hear Daniel’s voice screaming, “Keep it in your pants when you are in the office, at least, GOD!” in his most desperate voice.

 

“Earth to Thommy!” Julian was standing behind him, backpack slung on one shoulder. Thomas smiled up at Julian, standing up so that they can start walking back to the car. They both lived in the same condominium, thus they car pool often. “So, bother to tell me what crawled up your ass today?” Julian inquired. Thomas looked at him with raised eyebrows. “What? You have been acting weird the whole day long, smiling and daydreaming like you’ve gone fucking mental, you better tell me what happened, cause I KNOW something is on”, Julian blurts out in one breath, showing his curiosity that had been on the build up the whole day.

 

“Patience, my dear Jules, everything will be known in time. For now, I am dying in hunger so let’s find food and when we reach home I will tell you.” Julian considered for a moment before saying, “Ok. But you tell me everything, no keeping me on tenterhooks anymore.” Thomas nodded gleefully as he unlocked and opened the door of the car.

 

****************

Pharrell and Pedro stared incredulously at Guy-Manuel. He had come home, went to Pharrell who was chopping vegetables in the kitchen at the time and told Pharrell in a high pitched voice, “You got me into the biggest mess of my life, thanks so much”, before storming off to his room, slamming the door shut. Pharrell, confused, was wondering what on earth he had done to upset Guy-Manuel today.

 

So when Pedro came home, Pharrell told him about Guy-Manuel’s outburst and they waited for him to come out of his room together. Almost an hour later, fresh from the shower and smelling of lavender, he came out. But he did not look angry, just panicked and flustered. Pharrell and Pedro gave Guy-Manuel a ‘what the hell did we do?’ look and Guy-Manuel just sighed and sat on the sofa before telling them about Thomas being his boss.

 

The news was a total shocker to them, needless to say. Especially when Guy-Manuel told them the part about Thomas groping his ass and giving him a flying kiss. “He’s gonna come after me, I just know it!” Guy-Manuel cried. “But that is a good thing, right?” Pedro starts, “he’s interested in you and he’s making his intentions clear. You’ve gotta let someone date you someday, Guy-Man.” “Yeah, as I remembered, this Thomas guy is cute and what’s so wrong with putting yourself out there for once?” Pharrell is quick to add.

Guy-Manuel looks up at his flat mates and sighs, “I don’t do this, guys. I suck at this seduce and be seduced thing, most of the time I just get scared and shy and feel like throwing up”, Pharrell makes a face, “or running far, far away”, Guy-Manuel finishes as Pedro smacks his forehead with his hand in frustration. “Well, then just let him woo you away, then. If he is interested, he will ask you out, and soon. Just say yes to the date and get to know him, if you like him too, problem solved, you got a boyfriend”, Pedro tells Guy-Manuel slowly, like he was explaining something to a small, ignorant child.

 

Pharrell huffs then says, “But, Pedro, that’s the problem exactly. He’s so shy he will just lose his nerve and clamp with mouth securely shut or attempt to run away in the middle of the date or something. Or worse still, throw up on his date.” Guy-Manuel nods his head reverently at that. Pedro looks at his flat mates with disbelieve rimming his eyes. “But that’s exactly why he should get out there! He can’t stay like this forever and he has to start somewhere now does he? What better than a guy so eager that he has been ignoring his clear embarrassment and keep giving him hints anyway?” Pedro declares, voicing his annoyance with Guy-Manuel’s notorious shyness.

 

Pharrell nods at that, muttering “True, true.” He then holds both of Guy-Manuel’s hands in his and said, “Look, we only want you to be happy. You gotta try someday so why not now? Promise me that you will at least try to fight that shy thing you have, please?” Guy-Manuel looked at them both. He knew what they said was right. His shyness got in the way of almost everything in his life. At school, he was laughed at because he was so scared to go up to the blackboard. He accepted his low marks on assignments at university because of his lack of confidence in his presentations. He had virtually no friends expect for his flat mates and course mates due to the fact he never spoke to anyone. He nods, much to his flat mates’ excitement.

 

***************

 

“But is he good looking though?” Paul asks him over the phone. “Well…I guess he is”, came the reply. Pharrell had decide to get back up from Guy-Manuel’s little brother in coaxing Guy-Manuel to respond to Thomas’ advances. If there was anyone who could get Guy-Manuel to listen and do as they said, it was Paul. “Hmmm…” Paul mused, “I guess it is time that he got out of that little bubble he lives in. he only had one boyfriend before, and even that was suspiciously not convincing to me and my mum. My mum wants him to find somebody, you know? Not be alone all the time.”

 

“Yup I know. So you have my back on this?” Pharrells confirms. “Definitely dude! Its time somebody forced his hand to do something. You have my blessings and I am damm sure you have my mum’s too. Just wait till I tell her”, Paul says excitedly. After saying their goodbyes and good nights, Paul cuts the line and runs downstairs, barely containing his excitement. “MUM!” he yells, looking for his mother in the backyard.

 

***************

 

“And the forces of the world went into play and I met him again, an intern in my company!” Thomas exclaims, unable to contain his glee. Julian could hardly believe his ears; ‘forces of the world’ was a little bit too much for him. “So the guy you wanted but slipped away at the club is the intern in the chemical engineering department?” Julian asks for clarification. Thomas nods, “Uh-uh. He’s gonna be in the same building with me, Jules, where I can see him every day and make my move, I am gonna pull all my cards for this, he’s gonna be mine, Jules, just wait and see!” Thomas’ excitement was spilling out of his mouth and making Julian more and more dumbfounded.

 

“So”, Julian begins, “with this guy you don’t wanna just fuck and run, but you want him, like as in want all of him, as a boyfriend or something?” Julian wanted clarification. Thomas looks at Julian in frustration. “What else, dumbo?” Julian looks at Thomas with a serious face. “Cause you see, Thomas, the way you are describing this dude, being shy and quiet and all tense at your proximity at the club, he’s most probably not the fuck and run kind.”

 

Julian’s serious tone shocked Thomas. “If you just wanna fuck him then leave him, you will hurt him. Not everyone’s for you to conquer and dominate in the bed to sate your sex drive, Bangalter, there are decent, gentle people out there too.” Thomas looks at Julian, really looks at him. He knows what Julian is referring to, given his track record he can’t blame Julian. Then he thinks of Guy-Manuel, the way his face turned pink when he was near, the feel of him in his arms, the scent of his hair, and the taste of his lips…

 

Nope, this was not a lust thing. This pull in his stomach was not lust, he experienced that enough times already to know this isn't it. This was beyond that, beyond just wanting a hot body. He wanted that cute, shy and introverted young man, wanted him with a zeal he could not explain. Julian saw the look that came over Thomas’ face, that dreamy look when he thought of Guy-Manuel, and he understood. He laughed, laughed so hard he felt his ribs start to pain. “What the hell are you laughing at, idiot?!” Thomas gets angry.

“You've got it bad this time, now have you?” Julian says between peals of laughter. Seeing Thomas’ angry face, he stops laughing and offered help. “I’ll follow you down there tomorrow, ok? Under the pretense we wanted to see what new things that they came up with or whatever. And we will insist we want to know what our dear intern thinks of our company, fresh view crap and all. That will give you ample chance to try and seduce all you want, crazy lover” Julian draws out a plan in his head.

 

“That’s brilliant!” Thomas beams. “That will force him to talk to me. And maybe I will ask him out on a quick lunch or something afterwards, Julian Casablancas, you are brilliant!” Thomas does a little victory dance around the living room of his home. “I LOVE being the boss of my own company”, Thomas sings happily. Julian just laughs seeing Thomas doing his victory dance, he rarely saw Thomas out of his cool-suave persona and Thomas was really losing his element and acting like a child here.

 

That night, Thomas has difficulty falling asleep due to his excitement. When he does, finally fall asleep, he dreams of dancing the night away with a certain brown haired boy.

 

******************

 

The next morning saw a very serious Guy-Manuel studying the schematics for a new pesticide they were developing. Being an intern, he mostly only helped around with paperwork and passing things to the other workers, the actual engineers doing their job. He was very fortunate that he was not bullied like other interns usually were, quite the opposite really. This team of people never really had an intern before, and they were excited when Mr. Bangalter had suggested taking an intern who was on summer holiday from university.

 

The results? Guy-Manuel was loved and they hardly put any workload on him, if anything he was asked to just help with simple things, observe and learn. Almost like he was a child they had to nurture, really. That was what he was doing now, creating nature friendly pesticide was a new thing in the market and he was seeing how exactly the research into creating it was going. That was until, he heard some commotion outside the pantry where he was sitting at the small coffee table, papers spread all over.

 

Peeking his head outside tentatively, Guy-Manuel’s eyes widened as he saw none other than Thomas Bangalter, striding in looking every bit confident, removing his sunglasses and placing it in his breast pocket of the avocado green shirt he was wearing. He was accompanied by a tall, fair guy with a shock of black hair who looked like a rock star rather than somebody who worked in an office. Sensing danger, he quickly retreated back into the pantry and hid there.

 

He knew he promised Pharrell and Pedro, but hey, until Thomas did not ask him out, he did not have to face his demons. Somehow, he just knew, Thomas was here looking for him. He felt like he was a hunted animal of some kind, prey to a ferocious predator who was relentless in his pursuit of him. Soon enough, he heard Sam calling out to him. “Guy-Manuel? Where are you?” Guy hid further behind the cupboard. It was a dark corner, he will not be seen.

 

Sam scratched his head, perplexed. “Where has he run off to?”, he whispered under his breath. “I am sorry, I can’t seem to find him, I think he went to the toilet or something like that.” Sam was obviously nervous, he heard the jitters in Sam’s voice, he was obviously nervous with handling Thomas, who was looking quite intimidating at the moment. “That’s too bad”, he heard an unfamiliar voice say, most probably Thomas’s friend, “we thought of talking to him, you know. See how the internship is going on. We hardly have any interns to get feedback on anyway. Send him up to my office later, would ya?”

 

Sam stuttered a yes, I will and goodbye before Thomas and his friend walked out. After a while, when Guy-Manuel felt it was safe, he came out. Seeing him come out of the pantry rom, Sam huffed in disbelieve, “What! You were in there all the while! Why didn't you come out when I called?” Guy-Manuel gave him a sheepish smile. ‘How the hell do I explain this?’ he wondered. Coming out with a quick fix, he lied about being scared of Thomas and how he was intimidating.

 

Sam raised his eyebrows at that. “Well, he looked quite disappointed when I said that you were away. Maybe he just wants to talk you know, see what a youngster thinks? Maybe he just don’t wanna talk to us as we’re old”, Sm voices out his opinion. “But on Bangalter junior being intimidating, I sure as hell agree on that one, I’d be scared of him waltzing in looking for me too, especially with the human resources guy”, Sam added as an afterthought.

 

Seeing Guy-Manuel’s confused face, Sam explained about Julian, and how he was now practically the unofficial head of the human resource department. “The board of director’s kids are slowly taking over from the seniors I guess”, Sam told him as they walked towards the lab. All Guy-Manuel could register was that this guy, Julian Casablancas was quite a close friend of Thomas’. ‘Damm, he has backup…well, this is his parent’s company, which they founded with their friends, meaning this was Thomas’ turf, his territory. There’s no way you are gonna escape him, you’re done for, Guy-Man’, he despairs in his mind.

 

With everybody and the whole situation forcing his hand, he guesses there was nothing he could do but accept it. The time has come for him to let someone into the comfy bubble that was his world.

 

*************

 

Thomas knew that his precious was hiding from him. Knowing that he would be told to get to Julian’s office right away, he is in the storage room, waiting for Guy-Manuel to pass by. There was no way to Julian’s office but through there, so they was no way Guy-Manuel could run away. So he waited patiently, garnering weird looks from the cleaners who came in and saw him stalking behind the door. Soon enough, he saw his precious walking down the hallway, his shoulder long hair bouncing with every step he took.

 

Thomas waited until Guy-Manuel was just passing by the door before lunging out and grabbing him. Guy-Manuel screamed, actually screamed, before he saw it was Thomas who was now pulling him into the storage room behind him and closing the door shut. “Finally, some alone time with my precious”, Thomas tells Guy-Manuel with a low voice gleefully, locking the door behind him.

 

**CHAPTER 3: MY PRECIOUS IS MINE**

Guy-Manuel had decided to go up to Julian’s office right away after the tirade he heard from his senior coworkers. Don’t keep them waiting…you’ve been summoned right away so just go get it done…the sir is expecting you so you shouldn't keep him waiting, blah blah blah. He fully expected Thomas to be waiting in the office with Julian. What he did not expect though, was to be grabbed in the middle of the hallway. He screamed, panicked that some serial murderer had got to him and shocked out of his life, wondering what the hell had grabbed him until he saw Thomas, who was pulling him into the dark room behind him.

 

When he heard Thomas say those words, “Finally, some alone time with my precious”, and lock the door, he knew Thomas was not going to let him get away this time. “Did you really think that you could run away from me? Damm, look what you have done, making me hide in some dingy cupboard somewhere just so that I can get you to talk to me.” Thomas was slowly approaching Guy-Manuel with every word he said and Guy-Manuel was taking a step back for every step Thomas took forward. Until, that is, he felt his back hit a shelf of cleaning supplies. Thomas placed both his hands on the shelf on either side of Guy-Manuel, giving him no space to maneuver.

 

“Wha-what d-do you…” Guy-Manuel stuttered, only for Thomas to shush him. “What I want is you, pretty precious. And I know you want me back, given that pretty little flush you have on your face right now.” Thomas’ boldness surprised Guy-Manuel. He felt his body get considerably hotter, he was sure his face was brick red by now. “Yes.” That was all that Guy-Manuel was able to utter, he saw no point in lying as Thomas was reading his reactions like an open book anyway. Thomas gave him a sly grin before saying, “Don’t worry, my precious, I understand your shyness. Just know that I don’t want you to hide from me.”

 

Thomas grabbed Guy-Manuel’s elbows, drawing him close before pressing him flush against his body, wrapping his arms around Guy-Manuel in a tight embrace. He gasped at the proximity, shy at being handled in such a way. Thomas looked down at him, seeing his heart’s desire finally in his arms. “You have tortured me, my precious, I have dreamt of you sooo much that it hurt to not be able to touch you”, Thomas whispers. Guy-Manuel kept his gaze low, not daring to look at Thomas’ face, his eyes filled with hunger for him. “Oh, all the things I want to do to you, to make you all needy and whimpering for me, only me…”

 

Thomas leans in and grazes Guy-Manuel’s ear with his teeth, causing the young man in his embrace to shiver. “Thought that I would give up cause you were being all hard to get, my shy love? Cause you thought wrong”, Thomas whispers in Guy-Manuel’s ear before kissing his earlobe. “I-um-um-did not know how-eh-how to-” Guy-Manuel was finding it difficult to speak coherently as Thomas continued to nuzzle into his neck, kissing along the side of his neck and at his jawbone below his ear. “Shhh”, Thomas places a finger on his lips, before moving said finger to his chin, tilting his face up.

 

Thomas dipped his head and captured Guy-Manuel’s lips in a sensual kiss, one that left Guy-Manuel’s senses reeling. He felt whatever resistance he had in him melt away. Thomas licked at the seam of his lips, begging entry, and Guy-Manuel happily complied. Thomas was pouring all he had into the kiss, one hand carding through Guy-Manuel’s oh-so-soft hair and the other squeezing the jut of his hipbone. Thomas felt desire coursing quickly within him, his pants getting too tight for him as he grew hard. Guy-Manuel was fisting both his hands in Thomas’ curls, tugging gently. Thomas bit Guy-Manuel’s lower lip and sucked lightly, gaining a moan from the shorter man. Moving both his hands lower, he squeezed Guy-Manuel’s ass, making him gasp.

 

Wanting to make his intentions clear, Thomas bucked his hips against Guy-Manuel’s, using his hands to press their crotches together. Guy-Manuel, feeling Thomas’ erection, realized that he was hard too and was shocked at how his body was reacting to Thomas’ ministrations. Thomas was now rutting fervently against him. The sensation of their clothed cocks rubbing together sent sparks trough Guy-Manuel’s body, making him pliant in Thomas’ arms. He had never done this before, not with anyone, hell, he hasn't even really kissed with tongue before. Surprised at how passion was overtaking his mind and scared all the same, fearing he may do something he regretted later, he pushed Thomas off him.

 

Thomas was surprised at Guy-Manuel’s sudden rejection of him. At first he thought he had done something wrong, had crossed the boundaries and advanced too far. But then he saw Guy-Manuel’s face, that embarrassed, innocent looking face and something clicked in his head. “You have not been touched by anybody like this before, have you?” Guy-Manuel covered his face with both his hands, turning away from Thomas’s stare.

 

In that moment, Thomas understood why Guy-Manuel was behaving the way he did. He was so shy, so innocent in this game that he felt awkward and shy to respond to Thomas’ blatant display of affection and desire. The realization grounded Thomas somewhat. Suddenly Thomas felt extremely lucky, felt privileged that he was given the chance to touch Guy-Manuel, hear the sounds he made, when no one was ever given the chance to before. His precious was innocent, untouched.

 

Thomas moved towards Guy-Manuel, grabbing his shoulders and turning him slowly around. He held his wrists and pulled away his hands, uncovering his face. He kept his eyes closed tightly shut. “I am sorry, you most probably think I am pathetic or something…21 and as pure as snow…nobody ever notices me anyway, not in…not in that way…I just…just…” Guy-Manuel trailed off, failing to find the words to explain how he felt.

 

Thomas cupped his face. “You don’t have to be embarrassed about that, my dearest. And those who did not bother, well it’s their loss. You are absolutely divine to me.” Guy-Manuel dared himself to open his eyes and there he saw it. Pure, unadulterated affection and sincerity was in abundance in Thomas’ eyes, gently holding Guy-Manuel’, looking at him as though he was something precious, a real treasure he had discovered. “I really do want you more than anything else, have wanted you since the moment I first saw you at the club. I cursed myself god knows how many times for not asking your number, letting you go. I wish to make all of you mine, your heart, body and soul if you’ll have me. Do you understand that, Guy-Manuel de Homem Christo?”

 

Guy-Manuel looked up at Thomas’ expectant face. He nodded and gave just the tiniest of smiles. “Is it-are-are we…” Guy-Manuel looks up at Thomas “together or something now? I mean are we…” he felt too embarrassed to ask, feeling totally out of his element here. “Boyfriends, lovers?” Thomas supplied. “Only if you want it, want this, want me as your boyfriend, I’m not forcing you”, Thomas added, nervously as he feared rejection. Man, if Guy-Manuel refused, he could not, would not force him, but he will be crushed. He really yearned for this. Guy-Manuel held Thomas’ hand, drew in a deep breath and smiling serenely at Thomas, said “Yes. Yes, Thomas I will be your boyfriend.” Relieve and happiness hit Thomas at once. “Thanks for having me”, Thomas said as he laced their fingers together.

 

****************

 

“So you managed to somehow convince him to be your boyfriend? You guys are like an official item?” Julian wanted confirmation. Thomas had come in ten minutes earlier, looking absolutely radiant with that enormous smile on his face, bursting with excitement to tell Julian what had happened. “Yes, Jules, YES, my beloved sweetheart is my boyfriend Jules, he said yes!” Thomas could barely contain his excitement; he was practically running around the room, unable to sit quietly due to his excitement.

 

After the whole serious –will you be my boyfriend- conversation, they had exchanged phone numbers and e-mail addresses, Thomas ensuring he was not going to repeat his mistake. Thomas already decided to take Guy-Manuel out on a date Saturday night as to celebrate them officially in a relationship. The venue was to be a surprise for Guy-Manuel, all he knew was that Thomas will pick him up at seven in front of his flat. After some inpatient banging on the door, Thomas gave Guy-Manuel a light peck on the lips before exiting the room, an angry cleaner lady waiting outside. The lady gave them a cold stare before going in to take her cleaning supplies, muttering “Youngsters” under her breath.

 

It was Thursday today, giving Thomas only a day and a half to make plans and get reservations. Thus here was Thomas, relaying the good news to Julian who could not be happier to help Thomas plan. But in the end he just got Thomas more flustered. “Do you know what he likes? Or what he absolutely hates so you can avoid it? How if he has allergies and gets a reaction? Do you even have a clue of where to take him?” Julian’s tirade of questions burst Thomas’ happy bubble.

 

Thomas looked at Julian with a serious look. “Then it’s time for you to play detective, Jules.” Julian’s eyes widened at that and he outright refused, telling Thomas to solve his own mess (Ask him what he likes to eat, it’s so simple!), but Thomas pleaded nonstop until Julian relented. “Fine, I will come up with some kind of way to find out.” Thomas was so grateful he had Julian, he hugged him before leaving for his own office, smiling at everyone who passed by.

 

****************

 

“The annual dinner is a long way away, I don’t see why you are rushing to get the survey done.” Daniel Bangalter, the CEO of Hubgreen was looking at his son with an amused look on his face. “It’s best to get the thing in early, we have to sift through the info, get the stats then plan on the budget and all, I really think I agree with Julian that this should be done this week itself”, Thomas tries to convince his father. In an attempt to get to know Guy-Manuel’s favorites, Julian had proposed an elaborate ruse under the guise of preparations for the company’s annual dinner.

 

The plan Julian came up with was to get a survey done, one which required employees to fill out a questionnaire on what food they liked, what they would really want to try, what kind of food grossed them out and what allergies they have. Thomas had added to the idea, proposing they also ask what kind of music they liked and if they would like to have any live performance during the dinner. Of course, he was only interested in one employee, but the cover up story was that Julian thought it was a brilliant idea to get a survey done so that they can give the employees their favorite delicacies, avoid food they hated and get suitable music for the night.

 

All in all, it was a great idea, if they had the time to actually conduct a full scale survey. Thomas only had today to get the questionnaire printed out and tomorrow for the employees (mostly a certain intern) to fill it up. Also, he had to get the approval of his dad, the big boss of the company. The big boss who thought it was a great idea, but did not see why it had to be done in two days. Of course, it would have been easier for Thomas to just ask Guy-Manuel, but he wanted to surprise his sweetheart with his ‘resourcefulness’ and ‘creativity’. Yup, he got it bad this time.

 

Daniel, knowing his son, knew there was some ulterior motive behind this all, was racking his brain wondering why. ‘What would he get from all this?’ Daniel looked at Thomas’ hoping face. Deciding he was not going to let Thomas get whatever he wanted easily, he said “Thomas, this kind of things take time. The annual dinner is three months away. We have sufficient time to give it a week at least, to set the questions, print it out and distribute the flyers. The company is not small, you know, to do these things in two days.”

 

Daniel’s air of finality disappointed Thomas. He knew his dad was talking sense anyway, what could he say to make his father believe a survey can be done in two days? He sighed, accepting defeat. “Fine, then. I guess you’re right. I’ll leave you to your work then.” Daniel saw the disappointment on his son’s face. Curious as to why was Thomas so desperate to get this information, he stood up, calling, “Listen, son”, Thomas turns to see his dad walking towards him, “I guess I can help you if you spill your guts right now and tell me your real intentions.”

 

Thomas, knowing there will be hell to pay if he told his dad he the actual reason, racked his brains for a solution fast. “Dad, I just want to try and make an impression that I care to the people. Mostly people here just hate me as they think I got a free pass as I am your son. I want to be seen as a compassionate boss who thinks about his employees and try to understand them.” ‘Whoa, where that came from?’ Thomas thought to himself. But seeing his dad’s expression soften, he pressed on, “I need time to plan, dad. The food and show is just the start. There are so many things I wanna do, so many thinks I have to learn, with so little time. I hope you understand and help me here, dad.”

 

Assuming his son’s intention to be purely an innocent one, Daniel relented. “But do it in stages. Go department by department, or else you will shock the printing guys.” Thomas nodded. “How about we start with the PR and engineering department, then?”

 

***************

 

Guy-Manuel was sat at the bus stop near his flat, waiting for Thomas to arrive. His heart was pounding so hard, he swore it was going to burst out of his ribcage. The whole day Friday, Thomas and Guy-Manuel did not have the chance to meet, however, they talked for hours over to phone to make up for lost time. Thomas had called him that morning, telling him he missed him so much and couldn’t wait to see him tonight. “Dress nice for me, darling. I am gonna take you to a favorite place of mine”, Thomas had told him when he had inquired where there were going. He was a little curious and afraid he may be inappropriately dressed for the venue.

 

Last night, he emptied out his closet, looking for a flattering outfit to wear. Pharrell and Pedro were almost as excited as him, getting him to play dress up while they commented. Finally, he choose a red button down shirt which had a tartan like design, he left the top two buttons open and his shirt untucked, with grey slacks. He thought of dressing formally at first, but his flat mates strongly opposed that, saying that he should be himself on his first date with Thomas, all formal wear was definitely not him.

 

A sleek black colored Jaguar turned into the street, slowing down to a stop in front of Guy-Manuel. Thomas exited from the back of the car, walking up to Guy-Manuel, taking his hand, “Hello, my darling”, Thomas said and kissed the back of Guy-Manuel’s hand. Guy-Manuel stood slowly and Thomas pulled him gently towards the car. “This your ride?” Guy-Manuel asked, looking at the car with an envious look. “Ours, darling, ours”, Thomas said as he opened the back door and motioned for Guy-Manuel to enter.

 

Thomas crossed over to the other side and entered the car, sliding in beside Guy-Manuel and placed his arms around Guy-Manuel’s waist. Guy-Manuel rested his head on Thomas’ shoulder, looking up to see if Thomas objected. Thomas smiled at him and kissed his forehead and then dipped his head further to kiss his lips, sweet and chastely. “Shall we?” the man at the driver’s seat asked. “Yes, Liam, continue on to the intended venue”, Thomas answered.

 

Liam pushed a button and soft music started playing, before driving off again. Guy-Manuel suddenly felt underdressed, Thomas was wearing a dress suit, with shining shoes. He suddenly felt that he should have dressed formally. But Thomas thought different, “You look gorgeous, don’t think about it”, he said when Guy-Manuel voiced his opinion. They remained in silence as the car rolled on, Guy-Manuel wondering where they were going as they left the city. An hour later, they reached a secluded restaurant on a hilly area.

 

“Fine dining Thai food, darling.” Thomas whispered into Guy-Manuel’s ear. When Thomas had got back the questionnaire, he hungrily sifted through for Guy-Manuel’s answers. Favorite food? French and Italian, no surprise there. Absolutely hate? Weird food and greasy food. Allergies? Zero. Food to try? Something Asian and exotic. Thus, he booked a private room at his favorite Thai restaurant, wanting to treat Guy-Manuel to something he wanted to try. Liam drove to the entrance, where a waitress greeted them, then drove off to park the car. “Where will he go?” Guy-Manuel asked. “Oh, he will wait somewhere. That’s Liam, my driver, security and PA, all rolled into one”, Thomas tells Guy-Manuel nonchalantly.

 

Guy-Manuel is astounded but asks no further questions. They are brought to a beautifully decorated room with beautiful wooden furniture. Thomas pulls a chair for Guy-Manuel and he sits, feeling nervous and jittery of being in such an expensive looking place. “I already ordered when making the reservation so that we can get the food fast, I hope you don’t mind”, Thomas tells him as he takes his seat opposite Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel just gives a tiny, shy smile. Thomas reaches his hand over and holds Guy-Manuel’s hand, rubbing soothing small circles with his thumb. “It’s all right, Guy-Manuel. I want to do this for you. I wanna give you everything you wanna have, darling whether is it tasting some Asian food or something crazy, whatever your heart desires, honest.” Thomas looks deeply into Guy-Manuel’s eyes, making him blush. Suddenly something clicked in Guy-Manuel’s head. “The questionnaire.” He laughs.

 

Thankfully, a waitress came in to serve them the jasmine tea Thomas ordered along with their appetizers. “What is this called?” Guy-Manuel asked as he got his utensils out to start eating. “Som Tam, or a fresh mango salad. I personally love this thing,” Thomas replies. Guy-Manuel could see why, the salad was fresh and tangy, a burst of flavor in his mouth. Thomas seemed very happy to know that Guy-Manuel was enjoying the food and finally felt a tension he did not realize was there melting away.

 

Soon enough they had both polished off their salads and fell into an easy conversation. They talked about everything and anything, from school to music and movies. They found that they played musical instruments (Thomas the piano and Guy-Manuel the guitar), liked the same kind of music and liked to watch movies. Guy-Manuel was shocked to hear that Thomas used to dj in clubs without his parent’s knowledge and Thomas pleasantly surprised to learn that Guy-Manuel was accepted into a prestigious art college but turned it down in favor of doing engineering.

 

When their main course, rice with Tom Yam (very spicy soup with seafood in it) and sautéed vegetables arrived, Guy-Manuel excitedly tucked into it, before Thomas could warn him about the VERY spicy soup. Thomas laughed heartily when Guy-Manuel immediately reaches for his cup of tea and gulps it down. He pouts at Thomas, who found it the most endearing thing, Guy-Manuel looked so cute with his cheeks rosy from the heat as he drank up his soup. They ate and talked, soon it was time for dessert (glutinous rice with mango) and Guy-Manuel eyed it suspiciously when it arrived.

 

Thomas feeds Guy-Manuel the dessert, after much protesting on Guy-Manuel’s part (I am not a baby, I can eat myself!) who melted after Thomas flashed his puppy dog eyes at him. Chair pulled up beside Guy-Manuel’s, he placed on hand under his chin, supporting his head as he fed the sweet, glutinous rice into his mouth. They finished off their meals with more jasmine tea, by now they were both comfortable with full bellies and ready to go home for a good night’s sleep.

 

After Thomas calls Liam, they walk out together, hands held, gaining a few disapproving stares here and there. But they didn’t care, they were lost in each other, warm and fuzzy, too happy to let the world to them right now. “Back to Mr. Homem Christo’s, Sir?” Liam asks and Thomas nodded in affirmative. Guy-Manuel yawns, getting sleepy. Thomas taps his lap, motioning for Guy-Manuel to place his head there. Guy-Manuel shakes his head, embarrassed to be so engaged in such an intimate gesture. “Ah, come on, you’re sleepy and I bet my lap will make a very comfortable pillow. Come here and lay on my lap, I will wake you when we reach there”, Thomas huffs.

 

Guy-Manuel relents and slowly scoots over, laying his head on Thomas’ lap. Thomas immediately begins to play with his hair, lulling Guy-Manuel to sleep. “That’s it, darling, sleep”, he hears Thomas’ voice before he fell into blissful sleep. The next thing he knew, Thomas was tucking him into bed, a very soft bed in a room he was very sure was not his own. Before he could even ask where he was, Thomas explained, “You were far too out and I didn’t have the heart to wake you, so I brought you to my home to sleep instead.”

 

Guy-Manuel knew that Pharrell and Pedro may get worried if he didn’t go back, that he should call them and tell them he was staying the night over. Hell, he should be worried, being in somebody else’s house, somebody else’s BED, but this was Thomas, his Thomas, and he trusted his intentions. Anyways, he was too tired to think and his mind was just so fuzzy with sleep. Hence, instead of calling anybody or demanding that Thomas take him home now, he just closed his eyes and continued to sleep as Thomas kissed the crown of his head and whispered sweet dreams.

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 4: MORNING SEXYTIMES**

When Guy-Manuel woke up, he was momentarily bewildered. He was not at home, not in his room and there was someone holding him from behind. The person’s hand had snuck up beneath his shirt and was touching the bare flesh of his stomach, over his belly button. Panicking, he made to escape from the embrace before hearing a, “Shussh, it’s just me, you’re at my place”, somewhere behind him. The voice reminded him of the night before and how he ended up asleep in Thomas’ bed. Guy-Manuel sighed, leaning into the comfortable pillow before painfully noticing that he had a morning wood.

 

Suddenly, Guy-Manuel noticed that Thomas was actually very, very close to him, so much that he could feel his breath on his neck and his hand was now slowly stroking the skin near the waistband of his boxers. Wait, where were his pants? As though reading Guy-Manuel’s mind, Thomas whispered into his ear, “I removed your pants before tucking you into bed, I thought it wouldn't be comfy sleeping in it.” Thomas shifted behind him, and suddenly he was being turned slightly to face Thomas who was now propped up on one elbow.

 

Thomas kissed Guy-Manuel on the forehead, and then removed his hand from under Guy-Manuel’s shirt to cup Guy’s face. “You have beautiful legs, precious, all milky and fair”, Thomas kisses his nose, “skin so soft and smooth”, then his lips. Guy-Manuel’s hands immediately moved to Thomas’ back, fisting his hand in Thomas’ shirt. Thomas was kissing Guy-Manuel passionately, their tongues intertwining, Thomas tasting Guy-Manuel and Guy-Manuel tasting Thomas in return.

 

So enraptured he was in tasting Thomas, his head heady with sleep and passion that he did not notice that their bodies were now pressed flush against each other, his morning wood pressing into Thomas’ thigh. As the result, Guy-Manuel gasped in horror when Thomas broke away from the kiss and looked down, a frown forming on his face as he noticed Guy-Manuel’s ‘affiliation’. Why, oh WHY did he react so readily to Thomas’ proximity? How if Thomas felt uncomfortable, wanting just an early morning cuddle when he was raised to full mast? Moaning in embarrassment, Guy-Manuel moved to hide his face in Thomas’ chest. ‘Man, he must be thinking I am desperate or something, getting it up so easily’, Guy-Manuel thought angrily at himself, groaning.

 

Thomas removed his hand from Guy-Manuel’s boxers to stroke Guy-Manuel’s hair in what he hoped was a soothing gesture. He readjusted the elbow he was propping himself on to be able to better embrace Guy-Manuel. “Guy-Manuel?” Thomas asked gently. Guy-Manuel sighed against his chest, “I-I’m so so-sorry, I’ve made you feel uncomfortable…” Guy-Manuel didn’t have the chance to finish his sentence as Thomas abruptly moved away and sat up, glaring at Guy-Manuel. “You’re fucking unbelievable!” Thomas yells at him. Guy-Manuel, shocked at Thomas outburst, hid his face further into the pillow. “I-I’m sorry! I didn’t want to make you uneasy, getting horny like some teenager at every touch, oh god…” Thomas’ anger melted away at that.

 

Thomas began to rub circles on Guy-Manuel’s shoulder. “No, it’s me who should apologize. I shouldn’t have yelled like that. Just that I think that ANYBODY would think it’s normal to want their lover, that’s why they are together anyway, I keep on forgetting that you are a very, very shy person and expressing how you feel is not exactly your forte.” Guy-Manuel peeked up at Thomas’ words. “But know one thing, precious, I don’t mind one bit that my lover is hard and wanting in my bed. In fact I am happy that you are, really”, Thomas tries to reassure his boyfriend. Said boyfriend who was looking at him with an astonished look on his face, as though asking ‘really?’ “I just wanna give you pleasure, darling. I wanna make you feel so good, like you’ve never felt in your life, make you feel so good it’s blissful.” Thomas places his hand on Guy-Manuel’s hip, stroking gently.

 

“Let me be the one to satisfy all your needs, to give you all you want”, Thomas says as he moved his hands towards Guy-Manuel’s erection, stroking it through the cloth of his boxers. “Let me give you a piece of heaven, darling”, Thomas’ hand was stroking gently, making Guy-Manuel mad. He wanted more pressure on his erection, his whole body aroused and wanting release now. Flushing, Guy-Manuel nodded, giving Thomas permission to go on, much to Thomas’ relief, then turned to lie on his back fully, giving Thomas more freedom to maneuver. Thomas moved up to kiss Guy-Manuel deeply, whispering, “You won’t regret this, darling.”

 

Thomas moved his hand through the slit at the front of the boxers, grabbing Guy-Manuel’s shaft. Guy-Manuel’s eyelids fluttered close as he moaned, pleasure coursing through him. Thomas began squeezing Guy-Manuel’s shaft with alternating pressures, causing Guy-Manuel to whimper and arch his back off the bed. “Tell me, darling, are you enjoying this yet?” Thomas enquires with a smirk. Guy-Manuel just moans in reply. “Well, since you like me touching you, I don’t think you would mind me seeing what I’m touching, right?” Thomas said as he tugged Guy-Manuel’s boxers off him, letting his section spring free.

 

Guy-Manuel’s mind was hazy and his body felt as though it was set ablaze, even though he was still somewhat shy that Thomas now had full view of his junk. Thomas flings the boxers aside then continues his sweet torment, stroking just hard enough to make Guy-Manuel go crazy, wanting more. Thomas thumbed at the flushing head, already leaking pre cum. Guy-Manuel let out something that sounded like a strangled mewl, his body as tight as a bow string. Feeling he was being too loud, Guy-Manuel placed on of his fists in his mouth, trying to muffle the sounds he was making.

 

Thomas, not having any of that, moved to remove the fist from Guy-Manuel’s mouth. “Oh no, darling, I wanna hear the sounds you are making, all your moaning and whimpering for me, they sound so beautiful to me, I wanna hear you scream for me by the time this is over”, Thomas said, his pupils blown wide and his primal instincts, the one where he dominates taking over now. “Don’t think and try to control yourself, darling, just let go and let me take care of you” Thomas reaches up and whispers into Guy-Manuel’s ear, “Let me play with you a little, babe, pull at your strings and push your buttons till’ the sweet torment makes you come for me.” Guy-Manuel moaned at that, turning to look at Thomas’ face.

 

To say that Thomas was now playing with Guy-Manuel was an understatement. Thomas was slowly taking control of Guy-Manuel, enslaving his mind making Guy-Manuel apprehensive of letting go of his autonomy, scared of being like a puppet for Thomas to do as he will with at this point. Thomas sensed this and scolded gently, “My lover is thinking too much and enjoying too little”, kissing his forehead.

 

Thomas moved back down, kissing then licking Guy-Manuel’s leaking head. He gave soft kittenish licks up and down the shaft, before taking Guy into his mouth. “A-ahh”, Guy-Manuel began trashing uncontrollably at the sensation of Thomas’ hot, wet mouth around him. Thomas began bobbing his head up and down before Thomas hollowed his cheeks, sucking Guy-Manuel so hard it was driving him crazy. Thomas let go of Guy-Manuel’s cock, making an obscene pop sound before going down on him to swirl his tongue on the sensitive underside of Guy-Manuel’s cock. Guy-Manuel was now moaning loudly and trashing around wildly. Thomas, finding it difficult to hold Guy-Manuel down looked up at him and warned him, “I want you to stay still. You are trashing as though you are having a seizure. I will punish you if this goes on, darling.” Guy-Manuel felt a slight fear rise in his chest at Thomas’ dangerous tone, feeling no doubt that Thomas was going to punish him if he disobeyed his orders.

 

Slowing down, Thomas moved to nuzzle the dense bush of hair at Guy-Manuel’s groin, inhaling his scent deeply. Thomas sensed that Guy-Manuel was close by the way he was trembling beneath him. Not wanting the fun to be over so soon, he sits up and moves to push Guy-Manuel’s shirt up, looking to explore and wanting to see all of him. Suddenly, Guy-Manuel halts Thomas’ hand, coming up with a strangled “Ple-please don’t remove anything else.”

 

Thomas smirked at that, a predatory look on his face. In a very low tone he said, “So you are still thinking instead of letting me do what I want with you? I already warned you, but it seems you need to be punished after all.” Guy-Manuel yelped as Thomas manhandled him until he was on his stomach draped over one of Thomas’s thigh, his forearms supporting him on the soft carpeting of the floor. Thomas was sitting at the edge of the bed and he pinned Guy-Manuel’s legs between his two thighs, clamping tightly. “Wha-“, Guy-Manuel started as he tried to push himself up, his hand propped against the dark brown carpeting but was squashed down as Thomas places a hand on his shoulder, firmly pressing him in place.

 

“You know, I told you to stop thinking and let me handle you, trust me to give you pleasure. But you disobeyed, showing rebelliousness, trying to challenge my sovereignty over you. And what do I do to rebellious people, Guy-Manuel? I discipline them. As I will teach you discipline and remind you who’s in power here, darling”, Thomas supplied Guy-Manuel, all the while stroking the smooth skin of his ass and lower back. Guy-Manuel, panicking, feeling dizzy with blood rushing to his head asked, “How are you going to punish me?” while attempting to look up at Thomas. Thomas pushed his head down gently, a “Stay there and don’t worry, I won’t hit you too hard as it’s your first misdemeanor.”

 

‘Won’t hit me so hard?’ Guy-Manuel wandered before Thomas’ hand made contact with his butt, spanking him. “Ahhh!” Guy-Manuel yelped, the pain stinging his skin. Thomas was spanking him, slapping his ass and lower back repeatedly, which for Guy-Manuel was pretty painful. He struggled, trying to escape so that Thomas couldn’t hit him but to no avail. In fact the more he struggled, the harder Thomas’s strikes became. Remembering Thomas earlier warnings, ‘no trashing around’ a thought came into Guy-Manuel’s mind, causing him to stop struggling. “Oh, so you got it finally, the more you are rebellious the more I punish you, so until you don’t stay still and accept your punishment abidingly, I won’t stop spanking you”, Thomas said, confirming Guy-Manuel’s suspicions.

 

Thomas spanked him a few more times before stopping, asking “Do you think that you have learned your lesson or do you want more?” Guy-Manuel just sniffed, tears threatening to spill from the corners of his eyes due to the pain. His skin was stinging with pain and he didn’t like it one bit. He felt Thomas leaning over him reaching for the bedside drawer then opening him and shuffling things around, looking for something. He straightened up back again and began stroking Guy-Manuel’s shoulder. “I need you to be calm and breathe for this, ok, if not this will hurt when it’s meant to be fun.”

 

This time, when Guy-Manuel attempts to look back at Thomas, he is not stopped; instead Thomas moves his hair out of his face and tucks it behind his ear. “You did not cry”, Thomas noted, continuing, “although you look close to it.” Guy-Manuel just pouted petulantly and sniffs again. “You won’t hurt me, right?” he asks softly. Thomas smiles gently at Guy-Manuel, moving his hand through his hair. “I won’t.” Guy-Manuel just continues looking at Thomas. “Pinky promise?” he asks, making Thomas laugh. “This will feel weird at first but if you don’t stiffen up and tense your body it won’t hurt a lot, just a tiny bit, but it’s worth enduring, love”, Thomas reassures his lover. Tired of supporting his upper body on his palms, Guy-Manuel lowers his upper body once more, a trusting gesture for Thomas.

 

He hears Thomas opening up a tube and squeezing something, then “The lube will be a little cold. Breath in deeply, darling.” Guy-Manuel gasped when he felt Thomas’ index finger at his hole, just teasing the entrance gently, slathering the lube on. “Remember, relax babe. I’m just gonna feel you inside, ok?” Guy-Manuel hears Thomas’ voice but he can’t really register words, knowing now what Thomas intended to do. Guy-Manuel bit his bottom lip when he felt Thomas insert a finger into him, pushing in gently. Thomas proceeded with caution, Guy-Manuel’s hole was so tight and he didn’t want to hurt him. He stopped when he was first knuckle deep, stopping to check with his lover, “You ok?” “Um-mm…” came the reply, which Thomas took as a ‘yes’.

 

Feeling gently, Thomas took his time, brushing the inside of Guy-Manuel gently, trying to coax him to open up to him. He wondered if he could insert a second finger for a moment but decided to try and find his lover’s prostate seeing as Guy-Manuel was unbelievably tight and unyielding. Going in deeper, Thomas felt around for that sweet spot within his lover. “Aa-ahhh…” Thomas knew he has found it when Guy-Manuel started moaning and keening pitifully. Thomas felt Guy-Manuel relax into his touch and he began pumping his finger in and out, making sure to hit that soft, spongy bundle of nerves.

 

Guy-Manuel curled his toes, his fingers grabbing the furs of the carpeting desperately. God, he felt SO good right now. When Thomas pushed his finger in, the burn made him feel uncomfortable, the pain causing him to resist. But now, the pleasure was growing in leaps and bounds, overcoming the pain he felt. Thomas was right; this was totally worth enduring the slight pain for. He couldn’t stop himself from moaning, his body reacting on his own accord. ‘Oh damm, I am moaning so loud, I sound like a shameless slut’, he thought, biting his lower lip to try and suppress the sounds he was making.

 

Guy-Manuel felt the coil that has been winding up in his stomach wind unbelievably tighter, the sweet torment driving him crazy. He needed release, really needed it, his whole body was taut and needy and screaming to be given gratification. He heard Thomas’ voice above him, “Tell me, darling what do you want? How do you want me to do it?” Really, what did he want? He racked his brains, and came up with no answers but wanting to come. Still, he hesitated to tell Thomas that, not wanting to give Thomas the pleasure of having him beg and partially because he didn’t know what he wanted done to him anyway.

 

“So, you’re not gonna tell me?” Thomas was tugging his hair, moving his head up to look at him. Thomas’ face was hard, determined. “If you won’t tell me, I wouldn’t know what you want, now so I will just leave you while I go jack off in the shower and you can do whatever you want with yourself”, Thomas tells Guy-Manuel in a low, even voice. They hold each other’s gaze for a full ten seconds before Guy-Manuel felt Thomas finger leave him abruptly and somehow he was back on his back on the bed again. ‘Wait, how did that happen?’ Guy-Manuel was shocked that he was moved so easily and suddenly. “For the last time, my darling, tell me what do you want.” Thomas face was inches away from Guy-Manuel’s, his hot breath on his nose. Guy-Manuel was a mess, his hair all over the place, lips swollen from biting too hard and cheeks rosy.

 

“Don’t play coy with me, I know what you want but I am gonna make you say it. I wanna hear it, darling, until you don’t say it I won’t give it to you”, Thomas leans forward and whispers into Guy-Manuel’s ear before biting the earlobe gently. Guy-Manuel shivered as Thomas sucked and nibbled on his earlobe gently. Thomas moves one hand to one of Guy-Manuel’s nipples and pinches it through his shirt. “Baby?” he hears Thomas whisper again, “common, I wanna hear you say it, tell me you really want it.” Thomas is pulling and rubbing Guy-Manuel’s nipple, and that melts away whatever that was holding him back. “I want to come, I want release, god knows you are tormenting me and I need release, please oh PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME!” Guy-Manuel screams, his frustration coming through at the end.

 

Thomas moves back to sit properly and sees Guy-Manuel staring back at him, lips parted and panting heavily. Thomas grins devilishly, before saying, “That wasn’t so hard now, was it? If you would’ve told me earlier you could’ve come earlier too. ” Thomas pulls Guy-Manuel’s thighs towards him before grabbing Guy-Manuel’s cock and pumping it furiously. Guy-Manuel’s eyes rolled back in his head as he succumbed to the sensation. He was so, so close…

 

“Come on, scream for me, darling, so the whole world know that you are mine, come on darling”, Thomas pants as he sees Guy-Manuel starting to come. Guy-Manuel was far too gone, deep in his incoming orgasm to care anymore, screams at the top of his voice, “AA-AHHH! THOOOMMMAAASSS!” Thomas squeezes Guy-Manuel’s shaft gently as he spurts out hot, white ribbons of come, trying to prolong his orgasm as long as possible, all the while looking at Guy-Manuel’s facial expressions. ‘God, he looks divine when he comes’, Thomas thinks to himself. Guy-Manuel covers his eyes with the palm of one hand, swallowing in deep lungful of air. He was blissful, more blissful than he ever has been in his life, his mind clouded over in the intense sensations his body just experienced.

 

Guy-Manuel felt Thomas grab his wrist and remove his hand from his face, before saying, “Watch me, darling.” Guy-Manuel pushed himself up to sit against the headboard as Thomas pushes his sweatpants down, his own erection springing free. Guy-Manuel’s eyes widened as he saw Thomas beginning to stroke himself gently at first, then faster. He watched, enthralled, as Thomas grabbed his hand in his own and guided it back to his cock. Thomas closed his hand around Guy-Manuel’s hand, which was now moving up and down his cock, bringing Thomas close to his own undoing. The fact that it was Guy-Manuel’s hand on him, even though guided by his own, was making Thomas crazy, driving him up and close to the peak fast. He was already painfully hard from hearing Guy-Manuel and feeling him, thus he was very close and just needed a little push to go over. And go over he did.

 

Guy-Manuel watched in fascination as he heard Thomas moan loudly, then he was coming in his hand, all hot and streaming out white, pearly come. Thomas lets go of Guy-Manuel’s hand before opening his eyes and smiling at Guy-Manuel. “So do you wanna shower first?”

 

*************

 

Guy-Manuel was sitting on a chair at the small coffee table placed in the corner of Thomas’ room. He had showered, brushed his teeth and dressed. Thomas was now taking his shower and he was waiting for him to finish and come out before going to eat breakfast together. It was only now that he really had a chance to look around Thomas’ room. The walls were painted a periwinkle blue, a wooden vintage coffee table with two chairs at a corner, where Guy-Manuel was sitting down, a wooden study table and chair at another and thick creamy brown curtains at the humongous window. The carpeting was also a cream color with a dark brown square around the large bed. The bed sheets were dark blue silk. Overall, the room had a comforting, serene air to it. Thomas had a huge walk in closet in his room also, all white, bright and highly organized. The room was already gigantic; add in the walk in closet and Guy-Manuel felt that Thomas’ room itself was bigger than his flat where three people lived.

 

Turns out that Thomas had indeed wake up earlier, getting Liam to go get a change of clothes and toothbrush for Guy-Manuel from wherever it was Liam went. Liam had guessed his size right, and he was now wearing a black polo tee with khaki shorts. His flat mates, they were extremely worried that Guy-Manuel did not return and did not answer their calls, they thought that Thomas had kidnapped him or something. Thomas had gotten annoyed with the phone vibrating all night and decided to call Pharrell on his phone, seeing all the missed calls on Guy-Manuel’s phone and ensuring him that Guy-Manuel was safe and sound in his house. Guy-Manuel sighed and ran a hand through his still damp hair. Pharrell and Pedro were going to interrogate him non-stop the moment he was alone with them at home, and he didn’t particularly feel up to telling them what happened this morning. He blushed when he thought of this morning. ‘Damm, Thomas really made a mess out of me, making me moan and scream and all…’

 

Thomas came out of the bathroom, saw Guy-Manuel lost and thought and smiled. “Thinking about our sexy time together?” he asked, bringing Guy-Manuel back to reality. The blush on Guy-Manuel’s face was an answer enough for him. “Come on, I am sure Carla has breakfast ready”, he holds his hands out, beckoning Guy-Manuel to come close to him. That he did, and was rewarded with a hug from Thomas before he held and hand and brought him to the dining area. “Who is Carla?” Guy-Manuel asks, curious. “My housekeeper. Or leader of all my housekeepers I guess. She does most of the cooking and cleaning but she has two others cleaner to help her, and a grocer who comes in every Monday, so yeah”, Thomas answers easily.

 

Guy-Manuel was still contemplating how huge Thomas place was when he was brought into the dining area. The dining area was beautiful, a large red dining table was at the center, with six wooden chairs around it and a modern, cluster of snowflakes kind of looking chandelier hanging over it from the ceiling. As Guy-Manuel sat down at the table, a middle-aged, Latino woman with curly hair tied up in a ponytail, dressed neatly in a crisp white shirt and a lime green flowy skirt came in. She nodded at Guy-Manuel, then Thomas and asked, “What would you like for breakfast, Master Bangalter, sir?” “Hmmm…what does my darling want to eat?” Thomas wondered aloud. Guy-Manuel embarrassed of being called darling in front of the lady, hid his face in his hands, making Thomas laugh. “You should get accustomed to Carla, as I plan to bring you here a lot. Carla, this is Guy-Manuel, my precious sweetheart, and Guy-Manuel, this is Carla Ramos, my housekeeper”, Thomas merrily does the introductions.

 

Fighting down his shyness, Guy-Manuel removes his hand from his face and looks up to see Carla smiling at him. “Ahh…can I have…”, Guy-Manuel considers before saying, “pancakes. Yeah, pancakes with strawberry jam and chocolate syrup if you have it, please.” Carla beams at him, chirping out, “An excellent choice, sir! Master Bangalter here only eats grown up food, which I find boring. Finally, somebody here who really knows how to enjoy good tasting food!” Guy-Manuel looks at Thomas, eyebrows raised as Thomas just shrugged. “Fine, pancakes it is for my dearest, while I will have my usual grown up food, thanks.”

 

Carla just shakes her head at Thomas then nodded before she retreated to wherever the kitchen was. “Care to enlighten me on what the grown up food is?” Guy-Manuel asks. Thomas smirks then answers, “Scrambled eggs with toast, sausages and poached eggs on hollandaise sauce.” Guy-Manuel makes a face at him that said ‘you’re no fun’, making Thomas laugh and reach out to kiss Guy-Manuel’s forehead. Soon enough, their breakfast arrived and Guy-Manuel wolfed down his pancakes excitedly, happy to get home made pancakes after a long time. “Somebody’s happy”, Thomas noted, a smile tugging at his lips. Guy-Manuel just said “its pancakes, Thomas, hot and fresh with sweet strawberry jam. And lots of chocolate syrup”, taking the syrup container and pouring more onto his plate, content.

 

After their breakfast was cleared off, Thomas told Liam to get the car so that Guy-Manuel could go home. Carla had packed some extra pancakes for Guy-Manuel in a nice container to keep it warm. On the drive to Guy-Manuel’s home, they cuddled and kissed gently, just fooling around with each other. Thomas was disappointed that they reached the place so fast, he wanted to spend more time with his new lover. “Can’t wait to see you again tomorrow at the office, dear. Call me sometime”, Thomas tells his lover before giving him a kiss on his cheek. Guy-Manuel just nods before sliding out of the car and waving goodbye as Thomas’ car drove off. He was elated, feeling happier than he had in a long time. “Now, to face Pharrell’s and Pedro’s questions…” he mused as he climbed the stairs to his flat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 5: MY CONFESSION**

“What do you mean that you’re still a virgin? Like why?” Pharrell looked at Guy-Manuel with an exasperated look on his face. Guy-Manuel just shrugged, trying to look nonchalant even though he was blushing madly. Guy-Manuel had entered his flat about ten minutes earlier, opening the door and peeking his head inside stealthily. He was hoping that Pharrell and Pedro were sleeping, but instead Pedro was watching TV in the living room. His mind worked furiously, considering going down to the café for a little chocolate chaud to calm his nerves down before facing them. He knew they were waiting to jump on him with a waterfall of questions right now. He really didn’t feel like telling them what he and Thomas had done this morning, it was something private he cherished. Hopefully they will be having an afternoon nap and he can just slip in quietly into his room.

 

Trying to close the door, he did not notice that Pharrell was in the kitchen all along, where he saw Guy-Manuel hesitating in the reflection of the tall mirror beside the door. Just as he tried to back out and escape, Pharrell made himself known. “Hey, don’t you run away now, we have been waiting for all the juicy gossip for so long, we were practically dying to know”, Pharrell stated loudly, causing Pedro to turn around in the couch to see Guy-Manuel half hiding behind the door. “Damm, must you guys know everything?” Guy-Manuel asked as he entered the flat, closed the door and removed his shoes. Pedro stood up, walking towards Guy-Manuel, grabbing his shoulders and scanning him up and down.

 

“He’s not in what we left him with, meaning that he’s probably wearing Thomas’ clothes”, he started as Pharrell came to stand behind Pedro, “clearly he has showered as he looks clean and smells nice too.” “But my dear Pedro, that can only mean one thing…,” Pharrell stated with a grin, “…our little baby boy had a man take care of him with some hot ‘love’ last night!” Pedro finished excitedly, squealing with glee. Guy-Manuel, blushing madly and mortified, broke free from Pedro’s pincer like grip on his shoulders and walked towards his room. Pharrell runs forward quickly and parks himself in front of Guy-Manuel’s room door, effectively blocking his escape. “Oh, he’s so shy to admit that he’s lost his virginity and had hot sex with his man”, Pharrell said laughingly.

 

That’s when Guy-Manuel got extremely furious with his flat mates, staring them down with a death glare. “Nothing happened!” he screeched, causing Pedro and Pharrell to laugh loudly. Getting more flustered, he fisted his hands in his hair, tugging tightly and screaming, “Even if anything happened, it’s none of your business!” Guy-Manuel closed his eyes shut tightly, embarrassed. “Dude, we all do it, though we do it with chicks, but don’t sweat it, man”, Pharrell tried to calm Guy-Manuel down. Guy-Manuel drops his hands loosely, still not opening his eyes. “Nothing much happened, my virtue is still intact, thank you.”

 

Pedro looked at Guy-Manuel with a disbelieving look on his face. “You went for a date with the guy on some secret romantic gateway, when we called you didn’t bother to answer at all, which means you were occupied and eventually in the middle of the night Thomas calls to say that you are staying the night over at his place, and you expect us to believe that nothing happened but you two sleeping side by side, not even messing around in bed until noon”, Pedro expresses is doubts. Pharrell nods then say, “Come on, Guy-Manuel, it’s time you finally got laid anyway, we are happy for you. We just wanna know a lil’ bit, like if it was good, if you’re happy, that’s all.”

 

Guy-Manuel opens his eyes then takes a long, steadying breath. He knew that this was coming, there was no escaping it now. He looked at the expectant faces in front of him, found his voice and said, loud and clear, “I did not have his dick up in my ass…” Pedro smirks at that attitude, “…just a little bit of messing around, but yeah. Virtue still pristine, guys.” That’s when Pharrell dropped the why are you still a virgin bomb. “I dunno, I guess that we both just thought it’s not time yet, you know. We need to develop slowly, as the relationship progresses and stuff”, Guy-Manuel shrugged. Silence descended upon them at that, Pharrell and Pedro really feeling slightly ashamed at their bombarding, feeling the awkwardness drifting in the air. Pedro was the first to break the silence, trying to get rid of the uncomfortable mood that had settled over them. “So did he treat you well? Like where and what did you eat anyway?”

 

Guy-Manuel lightened up at that, it was a fair enough question. He walked back to the living room and sat down on the couch, ready to tell them a long story. “Well, he came pick me up in this really awesome sports car…”, and he recited the date to his flat mates, omitting what had happened this morning. To his relieve, his flat mates did not push him, understanding his reservations on this matter.

 

**************

 

Thomas had Liam drive him to his condominium, but he did not go home exactly, instead ending up at Julian’s house. “I think so you are lost, mister, cause as I remember it your home is in this building but not on this floor”, Julian greeted him as he opened the door, letting Thomas in. Thomas sauntered in, feeling as comfortable as ever, his cheery mood lighting up the living room. “You’re happy”, Julian gauges, “I take it that date night went smoothly.” Thomas sits himself in a beanbag at the corner, his favorite spot, stretching his long legs over it onto the tiled floor.

 

“Of course, Jules, I swept my sweetheart off his feet with my charm and wit”, Julian raises an eyebrow, “my precious was well treated as he deserves, and I gave him an extra pleasantry this morning too”, Thomas says with a light tone, inspecting his nails. “Oh god, I hope that you didn’t fuck the boy right after your first date, Thomas.” Thomas looks up to see a look of horror on Julian’s face, whose hands were on his hips. Thomas gave him a lopsided grin, leaning down further into the bean bag. “Oh, I am subtle with this one, Jules and cautious too. I only teased him enough to give him a prelude to what’s coming, and mess with his head just enough to give him something to remember”, Thomas contemplates.

 

Julian frowns, his eyebrow knitting together. “What the hell do you mean, I don’t get you”, he voices his confusion. Thomas looks at Julian with a ‘duh’ look on his face. “I already told you, Jules, this one is much more than just a sex thing. My precious is shy and innocent, so, I doubt that he would actually react well to me trying to go all the way just after the first date”, Thomas said slowly, “which is why I believe you have that look on your face, you can imagine Guy-Manuel screaming ‘pervert!’ and then running out of the restaurant disgusted.” Julian narrowed his eyes. “You are a pervert, he just doesn’t know it yet.” “I just cuddled then messed around a little, just to give him a taste of what’s coming in future, given that we are in a relationship, which with its development, will eventually lead to making hot, steamy love.”

 

Julian looks really surprised now, his jaw was hanging open. “Oh god, Thomas, you’re actually contemplating a REAL relationship with this guy, like a together all lovey dovey thing! I never dreamt this day would arrive”, Julian said in a high pitched tone, emphasizing his surprise. Thomas squints his eyes at that. “I have had healthy, perfectly functioning romantic relationships with people before, you know”, he blurts out. Julian shakes his head vigorously. “Nope, Thomas the two real relationships you had before were in high school, so those are based on hormone induced crushes and don’t count. Later on, it was all just a convenient set up to get laid to you, once you and partner were bored and done, you move on. It’s more of a sex relationship than an emotional thing with you, so this is really…” Julian pauses for a while, waving his right hand around, “…interesting to see. I never knew a shy little ‘angel’ was what you really wanted all along.”

 

Thomas just smirks at that. But then his expression softens as he remembered about his sweet, sweet precious, his cheeks rosy against his pale skin. He smiles shyly, “But this is different Jules, was different from the moment I saw him. It’s almost like there is a force drawing me to him, and I just can’t get enough of him at all. All of him is beautiful to me, even that shyness of his though it turns frustrating at times because it’s so HARD to get him to really express himself openly.” Thomas inspects his nails again. “Though that gives him an air of mystery that I love and just makes the chase all the more thrilling…” Thomas purses his lips as Julian covers his mouth with a palm in shock, his eyes wide.

 

“Damm, Thomas you’re done for. Do you know what’s happen to you, Thomas? You have no idea what’s hit you, don’t ya?” Julian asks him, causing Thomas to get bewildered. He gave Julian a look that said ‘what, please enlighten me’ while raising his shoulders and hands in an inquisitive manner. “You’ve been hit by love at first sight, Thommy. You’re done for, you’re not gonna escape all that mushy gushy feeling settling in on you all your life, he will be what your world revolves around. Consider you’ve kissed goodbye your old, Casanova self, Thomas cause you’reneverevergonnabethesameagain”, Julian spoke so fast, exited and out of breath that he jumbled up the words at the end.

 

Thomas just shrugged at that. Looking down at the floor, he admits something he had been denying all along. It was actually only now that he actually admitted to himself that he feels that way. “I actually have been feeling empty, Jules. All those partners, but still lonely in the end. I’ve been yearning to have somebody to hold when I come back from meetings, all warm and welcoming and smelling of home. I’ve wanted somebody to talk to, you know, just nonsense and laugh and lose myself in their world. Watch movies and critique them together or to dance with in the middle of my living room, just two of us in our own little world.” Thomas pauses and a start fiddling with his fingers, hearing his admission was making it all the more real, these things he had been denying in favor of living in the moment.

 

“Home has been lonely lately, Jules, in fact it’s not a home it’s just a house to me. Going back to my parents’ to feel the warm feeling of home just answered the inevitable, told me that they were no longer enough to fill this void in my life. I need…a partner, a lover to call my own. A person to transform my house into a home, Jules, a person to make me feel like I belong. I’ve been pretending all the while, just filling my life with meaningless encounters, putting up a façade of this cold, non-caring person. I actually have been feeling this way but I managed to shove it in a place it can’t reach me. But with Guy-Manuel, those feelings come back, I feel like he will fill up this void I have, I actually feel content when he’s there. Like I need nothing else, complete, with him at my side. I decided, if I look lame, so be it, but I must have him, at all costs, Jules.”

 

Julian had closed his eyes, somewhere in the middle of Thomas’ rant and only now that he heard silence did he open them again to see Thomas looking up expectantly. “God, Thomas, I know you love to talk and all, but that lecture? I already knew, Thomas, I am your best friend.” Thomas looked up in surprise. “What? I’ve known you for so long that you don’t have to say a thing for me to get you. But this just confirms what I said earlier. Love at first sight. Revel in it, Thomas, you’re in love”, Julian tells him with a look of wonder on his face, not believing that this was actually happening. Thomas felt almost stupid to think that he would be able to hide things from Julian, who knew him better than his own mother does. More than that, Thomas was feeling elated and a little dreadful as realization hit him at full force. He was in love with Guy-Manuel.

 

‘A person to hold, to love, to call my own. One that I don’t have to pretend around, one who would listen to all my insecurities and fears, one to comfort and console me. A lover. MY lover.’ Thomas felt a bubble of happiness inflate in his chest at that, making him all light and fuzzy inside. Thomas just grins dreamily at Julian who grins back.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 6: ASHAMED OF MYSELF**

That night, Guy-Manuel was chopping up vegetables for the chicken curry that was to be their dinner as Pedro stood at the stove, stirring the pot pull of nearly-cooked curry. The whole flat smelled of spice and it was making Guy-Manuel’s mouth water. Pharrell had gone out to get some instant naan flatbreads from the nearby grocery store to go along with the curry. Finishing off the capsicums, he passed it to Pedro who added them to the curry. Guy-Manuel was inhaling the scent of the curry, stomach growling and wondering how long it would take for Pharrell to return so that he could microwave the naan and eat up that delicious curry. He could have a small taste, surely. ‘Just a little curry to taste, if not they’ll get suspicious’ he thought when he heard his phone bleep. He frowned as he got his phone. He rarely got any messages at this hour.

 

‘Wondering what you are doing, my love. Have you eaten? What was dinner today? Hmmm, I wanna hear that voice, you free?’ Guy-Manuel smiled at the message Thomas sent him. Pedro, seeing that smile, mouthed a ‘go’ at him while reaching towards the green chilies to slice them, freeing Guy-Manuel of his kitchen duty. Guy –Manuel hesitated, wondering if Pedro could handle watching over the curry and chopping the garnishing at the same time. He said “It’s okay, I will help with the veg’s first”, earning a “Shoo!” from Pedro who waved his hand as though to chase Guy-Manuel away. Guy-Manuel muttered a quick thank you before scrambling to his room, making Pedro chuckle.

 

Sitting on the bed with one leg folded up against his torso and the other hanging over the bed, he typed his reply. ‘I was helping my friend make dinner, so I haven’t eaten. We’re making chicken curry with naan today.’ Guy-Manuel set his phone down, excitedly waiting for the reply. Hardly a minute later, his phone bleeped again. ‘What? It’s so late and you’re still hungry? Tell me you had a heavy lunch or something.’ Whoopsie. It was already 10.23 P.M. actually. Guy-Manuel had an annoying habit of avoiding eating because he felt he was fat, and the cover up reasons being his homework, revision or pure laziness. He was one of those people who only ate when they were absolutely hungry, or felt he was going to faint if he didn’t eat or his flat mates ate and nagged at him, reminding him he needed to eat.

 

Formulating a reply to avoid a lecture, like he always did with his mother and flat mates, he typed slowly and carefully. ‘I actually am not hungry at all. I had those pancakes Carla made for me for lunch. They were very filling. We are all only making dinner now, so we will eat in a bit. We usually have late dinners, anyway.’ Guy-Manuel read his message three times over before hitting the send button. Hoping that Thomas will be placated, he waited anxiously. He waited and waited but the reply never came. Guy-Manuel whined. Why didn’t Thomas reply? Thomas said earlier that he had wanted to talk to him? Why didn’t he call? Guy-Manuel bit his lower lip. He suddenly had a bad feeling. Actually, he had lied a little in that reply. He did eat those pancakes until he was full, actually ONE singular pancake, while Pedro and Pharrell had engulfed the rest as he narrated his date night. He felt he had eaten enough for the day given how much he ate last night and this morning. Panicking, he tried calling Thomas. He did not answer.

 

Guy-Manuel held the phone in one hand as he lay down. Was he mad at me? Maybe he had to go to the toilet? Why is he not answering? Did he somehow guess that I lied and is angry? Guy-Manuel pouted. He wanted Thomas to reply, and he wanted it now. The typed furiously. ‘What the hell? Why suddenly no answer? Whhyyyy? :-( I want a reply now! Now! Nooowww! Wuuu…I’m crying…wuu…’ Guy-Manuel knew he sounded like a petulant little child, one who was stomping his foot while demanding his mother gave him cookies, but he couldn’t care less. He was feeling like a petulant child right now, actually. When his phone bleeped, Guy-Manuel unlocked it and opened the message excitedly. ‘Wow…was demanding while crying! Don’t worry hun, I will cheer you up real soon. Just be patient or I will spank the demands out of you. Love, your self-appointed discipline enforcer.’ What the hell? Guy-Manuel was left wondering what Thomas meant. He closed his eyes, deciding that he will worry about it later as he drifted off to sleep. He felt so, so tired, he just needed to sleep right now.

 

He heard Pedro knock on his door then come in, telling him that dinner was ready and he should eat first before sleeping. He just moaned, he was comfy and he didn’t want to get up. “I’ll save some for you, just heat it up and eat it later, ok? Promise you will eat it?” “Hmmm”, Guy-Manuel replied as he hugged his bolster, content in dreams. Pedro sighed, defeated and left him alone. Guy-Manuel was far asleep when he felt somebody tug his bolster away. He wanted his bolster back, but he was too sleepy to fight for it, so he just let it be. The person smoothed his hair, caressed his cheeks then whispered in his ears, “Wakey, wakey, you need to eat dinner.” “Hmmm, later, I wanna sleep, I’ll eat extra at breakfast.” He was so accustomed to lying about eating to everybody, he was even doing it in his sleep. Somehow, the voice sounded like Thomas. Guy-Manuel thought he was imagining things.

 

But then he felt the person kiss him, while embracing him. ‘Definitely dreaming of Thomas’, Guy-Manuel sighed. “Sleepy head, won’t you wake? You’re being a very naughty boy. I’ll have to punish you if this goes on.” Now Guy-Manuel was annoyed. He wanted sleep! He huffed stubbornly then buried his head deeper into the pillow. “Stubborn and demanding…definitely needs straightening out”, he faintly hears the voice say. He felt himself being lifted of the bed and repositioned to be on his stomach. That’s when he was woken up in a very unfortunate manner. See, Guy-Manuel was not dreaming Thomas was there. He really was there. And he was not happy at all. The results were a screaming, unhappy and petulant Guy-Manuel who was later forced into eating his dinner while Thomas watched him and Pharrell and Pedro suppressed their giggles.

 

******************

 

Xxx EXPLAINATION BEGINS 10 MINUTES BEFORE GUY-MANUEL WAS UNWILLINGLY ROUSED FROM SLUMBER ;-)xxx

 

Pedro and Pharrell were wolfing down their dinner while watching Dr. Who on the TV. They were halfway through their meal when the doorbell rang. “I’ll get it”, Pharrell said as he placed his plate down on the coffee table and moved towards the door. Oh boy, was he surprised when he opened the door. Thomas Bangalter was leaning in the doorway, looking all swag with a pair of jeans, avocado green shirt and a leather jacket. Pharrell looked down to see a pair of MEAN looking motorcycle boots. “I’m here to check on Guy-Manuel, he lives here, right?” Pharrell just nods and lets out a garbled “C-Come i-in”, too shocked to think straight. “Thank you”, Thomas says as he steps in, kicking out his boots, oozing bad boy attitude all the way. Even Pedro is glued to his seat in surprise, seeing Thomas come in and look around their modest flat.

 

“I’ll go wake him”, Pharrell said as he closed the door and moved towards Guy-Manuel’s room. “No, don’t. I am here, as I said earlier, to check on Guy-Manuel. That doesn’t necessarily involve me seeing him. But it does involve me getting info from you guys.” Thomas’ statement shocked Pedro and Pharrell. Pharrell sat back down on the couch, curious. “What ya’ wanna know?” he asks. Thomas gave out an easy smile, one that was charming and confident. “I am slightly alarmed of my precious’ reply when asked about his diet. He seemed…evasive as to if he has eaten a proper lunch and he clearly has slept when he was supposed to eat dinner”, Thomas said breezily while looking at Pharrell and Pedro.

 

“So?” Pharrell asked, although he could guess where this was going. “You’re right actually, he only had A pancake for lunch” Pharrell supplied, “and he did not eat anything else since he arrived here.” Thomas raised his eyebrows as though asking ‘really?’ “Really really. Guy did not eat anything since lunch and now he’s slept. I thought he was talking to you, but when I checked on him he was asleep and refused to wake up. I guess he just feels lazy again.” Pedro informs Thomas in a slightly annoyed tone. “Hmmm…judging by your very annoyed tone, I guess that this is a bad habit of his that you’re sick of lecturing him on?” Thomas asks. Pharrell and Pedro both nods fervently. “Tell me, what’s with Guy-Manuel and skipping meals?” Thomas leans forward, resting an elbow on his knee while his palm supported his chin.

 

Pharrell and Pedro launched into a tirade about Guy-Manuel’s neglect when it came to eating. How he often studied or worked on assignments until he lost track of the time, not remembering to eat. How he preferred to continue on sleeping instead of waking up and eating. Sometimes he overslept until his tummy was bloated with wind and he couldn’t eat at all until he took medication to clear it out. Lastly, the one which was most painful for Thomas to hear, which was how Guy-Manuel was insecure about his weight, often feeling he was fat, causing him to take drastic measures to bring his weight down. Drastic measures which included purposely starving himself out of hurling his food back out. Thomas sighed and closed his eyes. He’ll be dammed if he didn’t let his precious know how beautiful he was, and if he didn’t stop Guy-Manuel from harming himself by not eating enough.

 

He stood up. “So you say, this is a lifelong habit, one that his mum and you two have been trying to curb but he just refuses to let go off?” Thomas wanted confirmation. Pedro let out a drawled out “Yeeaaahhhh…” Thomas smiled at them. “I guess we have to resort to more drastic measures then? I mean if advising him doesn’t help, and he wants to behave like a child, then we should punish him like one.” Seeing the confused looks given to him, Thomas motioned them to follow him into Guy-Manuel’s room. His precious looked so cute sleeping, his lips slightly parted, hair wild everywhere and clutching a bolster close to him. The phone was still near his hand, as tough he was holding it earlier, made Thomas feel a slight pity. He had made Guy-Manuel wait anxiously for his reply for so long.

 

But his pity faded away when he remembered why he didn’t reply. He had sensed that Guy-Manuel was lying and he wanted to come here and check if he really was eating dinner. Well, after trying to coax Guy-Manuel out of his slumber painlessly, Thomas looked back at Pharrell and Pedro and mouthed a ‘watch me.’ He overturned Guy-Manuel on his stomach and spanked him three times, not on his butt but on his lower back, where it really hurt. Pedro gasped and covered his mouth with his hand, shocked. It seemed to be an effective method though, since Guy-Manuel jumped awake immediately, not happy that he was awakened in such a crude manner. He saw Thomas, who was smirking, then grabbed his bolster and threw it at Thomas, angry. Thomas just laughed heartily.

 

“Angry now are we? I told you I will punish you if you were undisciplined. Sleeping with an empty stomach definitely warrants a good spanking”, Thomas tells him in an amused voice. Guy-Manuel pouted sulkily and banged his fists on the bed. “Why do you care, I’m not starving to death or anything! I just don’t wanna eat today…”Guy-Manuel whined. Thomas moved forward and held Guy-Manuel in his arms. Pharrell and Pedro shuffled out of the room at that. Thomas rubbed circles onto Guy-Manuel’s back, trying to get him to calm down and listen to him. “Because I care, my darling. I care if you are unknowingly causing harm to yourself by not eating properly. How if you ended up getting gastritis? You’re hurting your tummy by not eating. Your body is going to get weak if it doesn’t have proper nourishment.” He felt Guy-Manuel sigh against him.

 

“I’m sorry, it’s just…just that I get so lazy to eat at times, it feels like a chore and it’s not like I should be garbling down too much food anyways”, Guy-Manuel mumbled against Thomas’ chest. Thomas’ heart constricted in pain at that. He knew that Guy-Manuel lacked a lot of self-confidence, his quietness and timid nature attested to that. But he never expected this. He remembered all the leaflets he had read about eating disorders. There was one about those who hated to eat. His precious thought he was fat and ugly. ‘Oh god…no wonder he didn’t want me to remove his shirt earlier today. He didn’t want me to see him because he thought he was ugly and that I will be repulsed seeing him. He doesn’t know how wrong he is…’ Thomas thought.

 

He released Guy-Manuel from his embrace and cupped his face. Guy-Manuel was looking down at his sheets, his face flaming red. “Look at me, darling.” Guy-Manuel looked up at Thomas, vivid electric blue meeting calm hazels. “I care so much about you that I always wanna keep you safe. To do that I will not let anybody harm you at any cost. Even if that person harming you is you yourself. Do you understand me, Guy-Manuel?” The sincerity in Thomas’ voice melted the fight out of Guy-Manuel’s system. He nodded at Thomas, his eyes shining with tears. “Do you really care that much, Thomas?” Guy-Manuel whispered. Thomas smiled at him and whispered back “Yes” before leaning in and kissing him, pouring all his emotions into that kiss.

 

When Thomas pulled back, Guy-Manuel was smiling, his eyes still closed. When he opened his eyes slowly, Thomas saw a tear drop from the corner of his eyes to stream down his cheek, and he quickly wiped it away with his thumb. “Now, since that is all sorted out, I want you to go out there and eat a considerable amount of food before you settle in for bed. I won’t let you sleep if I feel you haven’t eaten enough. Ok?” Guy-Manuel shifted uncomfortably, clearly not liking the idea, but eventually he nodded and Thomas carried him bridal style to the table. He placed a bowl of curry and two naan flatbreads in front of him before whispering “Eat, darling.” Pharrell and Pedro were watching from the hall.

 

After eating barely half a naan, Guy-Manuel tried to stop eating, “My tummy really is full, I can’t take another bite”, but was scolded, an argument ensued, then a high pitched “But even a baby can eat more than that!” came out, causing Guy-Manuel to sit back down and continue eating. He ate slowly, under Thomas’ watchful eye. When he gagged, Thomas slammed a hand on the table, the loud sound scaring him. “Oh no, you don’t. You’re gonna eat and keep it down. I am staying back later to make sure you don’t hurl it down the toilet, too.”

 

Guy-Manuel’s eyes widened at that, confirming Thomas’ suspicions that that was his plan all along. To think of it…Guy-Manuel did knock out quite fast after their meal yesterday…probably because he was not used to having a full belly and that his body was weak from lack of food. He hardly ate anyway, but Thomas had that chalked that up to Guy-Manuel not being able to bear the spicy food and nerves. Seeing him eat the curry, clearly that was not the case at all as he was tolerating the spicy curry just fine. It was all making Thomas feel sad. Nearly two hours later, after many attempts by Guy-Manuel to forsake his food for sleep, he finally finished his bowl of curry and naan flatbreads. Pharrell and Pedro have long since gone to bed, too tired to wait and see what happened. “Good, you finished up your meal”, Thomas petted Guy-Manuel’s hair and carried the dishes to the sink to wash them.

 

Guy-Manuel had been quite amicable the last half an hour, eating his food silently and being compliant in general, so Thomas never saw what came next. Guy-Manuel stood up and made to follow Thomas. Thomas assumed that Guy-Manuel was going to go to the sink to wash his hands, having eaten the naan with his hands. He didn’t know how wrong he was and what was actually in Guy-Manuel’s mind. He didn’t notice that Guy-Manuel stopped halfway, waiting for Thomas to get quite far away from him as he inched slowly towards the toilet. When he reached the kitchen, he turned around, wanting to tell Guy-Manuel to wash his hands first. That’s when he saw Guy-Manuel making a mad dash for the toilet. Thomas ran after him, but he was too late. Guy-Manuel had already entered the toilet and locked the door.

 

Soon enough, he heard Guy-Manuel gagging and throwing up into the toilet bowl. Thomas winced at the sound. “Guy-Manuel, stop that! You’re harming yourself by doing that, stop it! Oh for god’s sake, STOP IT!!!! YOU DON’T NEED TO DO THIS, YOU’RE FINE THE WAY YOU ARE!!!” Thomas was now shouting at the top of his voice, but to no avail. He still heard Guy-Manuel retching inside. He pounded the door relentlessly, hoping the lock will give way or something. Stopping because his fists hurt, Thomas ran a hand through his curls. He was pissed, beyond pissed. He was pissed at Guy-Manuel for doing this to himself. But more than that he was pissed with himself, for letting his guard down when he already knew that Guy-Manuel was planning this all along. Bulimics never wanted to eat, and when forced to eat, didn’t want to keep the food down.

 

Guy-Manuel had been using excuses for years, trying to pass off as a person who was so busy he forgot to eat. But no more. He was not going to fool Thomas, he knew now that his lover has a serious issue and Thomas was as determined as ever to get Guy-Manuel to quit this thing. Somewhere in the back of Thomas’ mind, something caused him to calm own. He took a deep, steadying breath. Right what did he read about this…yeah? Bulimia is a psychological thing, often stemmed in low self-confidence issues, people suffering from it need a lot of love and support to get over it. At time they feel helpless because they can’t stop themselves from hurling. ‘Which means me pounding like a mad man here does not help at all’ Thomas mused. He had to show his precious he was there for him.

 

“Darling open the door, please! I am not mad at you, I need to know you’re all right. Please?” Thomas tried his luck. Inside, he could hear Guy-Manuel sobbing. He wished more than ever that he could break down the door just to hold Guy-Manuel and tell him that it’s all right. That it didn’t matter. That he was beautiful and perfect in his eyes. That Thomas loved him so, sooo much. Guy-Manuel also wished to be in Thomas’ arms. He sensed that Thomas was mad with him right now for what he did and he KNEW why Thomas was so mad, thus he was scared to go out and face him. He was hurting himself by doing this, he could even kill himself, but what to do? It’s just the way he was. There was no way he was going to go out and face Thomas. He was too ashamed of himself to do that.

 

Guy-Manuel flushed the toilet and washed his hands, washing away the saliva and vomit from where he stuck his fingers down his throat with soap and water. Washing away another bit of his self-esteem. He sighed and curled up into a ball in a corner. He started crying, crying real hard. Outside, Pharrell was handing Thomas the spare key to the bathroom. All of Thomas’ shouting woke Pedro and Pharrell, who learned of what had happened. They too were not shocked, they had their suspicions that Guy-Manuel was bulimic but they never really caught him and they didn’t want to ask Guy-Manuel upfront. “We have a spare key to all the rooms, for emergencies”, Pedro told Thomas before hurriedly walking towards the living room to take a small box from the small bookshelves where they stored their DVDs.

 

Fishing the spare key from inside, he handed it to Thomas, saying “Go help him, Thomas. He needs you.” Thomas nodded and inserted the key into the slot, turning it and feeling it unlock. He pushed the door open gently. His heart broke when he saw Guy-Manuel. His precious was sitting at a corner, curled into a ball, his body racked maniacally by sobs. Thomas walked slowly towards him and held his shoulders. Guy-Manuel looked up in surprise, his cheeks streaming down tears before he let out a hoarse “Why? How?” coming out of his sore throat. “Shhh, doesn’t matter”, Thomas said as he opened his arms, motioning for Guy-Manuel to come to him.

 

Guy-Manuel immediately hid his face in Thomas’ chest and Thomas wrapped his arms tightly around him. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry….” Guy-Manuel cried repeatedly, making Thomas’ heart break further. He just held Guy-Manuel tightly, kissing him on the crown on his head, reassuring him. Sometime later, Guy-Manuel’s breathing evened out and he stopped crying. “Darling?” Thomas called tentatively, but he found that Guy-Manuel had fallen asleep. He carried Guy-Manuel to his bed and tucked him in, kissing his cheek before moving away. But then Guy-Manuel’s hand grabbed his shirt and he mumbled, “Don’t leave me, please…”

 

Thomas removed his clothing until he was left in only his boxers and snuggled in next to Guy-Manuel who immediately settled his head on his chest. Thomas placed his arm around Guy-Manuel protectively, swearing that he will pour so much love on Guy-Manuel that he will never be insecure in his life again. With that thought, he closed his eyes and felt sleep slowly take him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 7: NURSING WITH LOVE**

The next morning, Guy-Manuel woke up in a daze, feeling weak and all drained out. His memories from last night hit him suddenly, a wave of shame rising in his chest. He felt around for Thomas but found he was in bed alone. Sighing, feeling disappointed at his missing partner, he looked at the alarm clock, which showed 9.42 A.M. which meant he was already late for work. Deciding that he might as well call in sick today, given that he wasn’t up to going out anyway, he closed his eyes and attempted to continue sleeping. That is, until somebody pulled the blinds open and the sunlight hit him like a mega punch to his face. “Ahhhh!”, he screamed, pulling his blankets up to cover his face and block the sunlight. He heard the sound of the blinds being pulled closed again and approaching footsteps.

 

“You ok, darling?” he heard Thomas ask, pulling the blankets down gently to see his face. Guy-Manuel looked up at Thomas. His hair was wet, so he had showered and he was wearing a pair of black sweatpants with a gray ice-t shirt. He stroked Guy-Manuel’s hair gently, a concerned look on his face. “You’re having a fever”, Thomas informs him, motioning to the digital thermometer on Guy-Manuel’s bedside table. “Maybe it’s because you cried so much and heaving takes a lot of effort anyway. I got Julian to call in sick for both of us, so I’m staying here to care for you.” Thomas leans down and kisses Guy-Manuel on his forehead. Suddenly, Guy-Manuel felt bad for Thomas. He had made Thomas worried, and now Thomas was staying back to take care of him. “You don’t have to nurse me, Thomas. I’ll be fine”, he promptly said.

 

Thomas gently moved Guy-Manuel’s hair off his face, tucking it behind his ear. Thomas’s heart was crying out at the sight before him. His love looked really sickly. Guy-Manuel was deathly pale, his trademark rosy cheeks drained of its color, his eyes puffy and his lips cracked. Thomas felt a wave of pity surge through him, followed by compassion and a hint of protectiveness. He knew that Guy-Manuel was most probably conflicted and his emotions in a raging turmoil right now. Thomas wanted to be there for him, to take care of him, make him feel loved and let him know how much he cared. “I want to, darling. Anyways, I don’t trust you to eat properly, you’re sick and need meds which you can’t take on an empty stomach. Without the proper meds, you won’t recover, instead you will get more ill”, Thomas said slowly in an even tone to Guy-Manuel, carefully choosing his words, not wanting Guy-Manuel to have an emotional outburst first thing in the morning.

 

Guy-Manuel let out an embarrassed “Oh!”, to which Thomas smiled and leaned down to kiss Guy-Manuel’s lips chastely but lovingly. “I’ll go get your breakfast, I called up Carla and asked her to make soft food for sick people. Liam just sent it and it’s all warm and nice”, Thomas said as he woke up and walked out the room, going to get the food. Guy-Manuel’s eyes welled up. Thomas was being so kind to him. He sobbed into his pillow. It had taken him so much of courage to get past his insecurities and respond to Thomas’ affection. He found it so hard to believe that Thomas even wanted him. What did Thomas see in him? Why was he so hell bent on caring for him? This was his mess, his screwed up mind. After his stunt last night, of course Thomas didn’t trust him to eat, and now he’s staying back to babysit him and make sure that he eats his meals properly. Why would Thomas sacrifice so much time for him? Was he really that important to Thomas?

 

Thomas came in with a tray of food and saw Guy-Manuel sobbing into his pillow. Panicking, he quickly set the tray down and moved to pull Guy-Manuel into his arms. “Shush, don’t cry. It’s over. Whatever happened last night is over. You’ll get over this and I’ll help you, ok? I’ll be there every step of the way, helping you kick off this…thing”, Thomas whispered in Guy-Manuel’s ear. “But you don’t understand”, Guy-Manuel sniffed, “I get fat easily. Even if I just eat normally, I get fat. It’s ugly to have all that flab around, you know…”

 

“You are not fat! You are chubby and that makes you look cute. You have a wide body frame, that’s it. Not everybody is naturally skinny, you know”, Thomas supplies. Thomas feels Guy-Manuel smile against his chest. “You think I’m cute because I’m chubby?” Thomas releases Guy-Manuel and promptly pinches his cheeks. “Of course. Your cheeks are so full and rosy and you have the most amazing, firm thighs and beautifully shaped legs which are filled to perfection…and don’t even start on the curves of your hips and your pert ass, because those are absolutely divine and just thinking of them is enough to give me a hard on, I’ll definitely jump on you helplessly and I don’t think it’s advisable to have sex while having a fever anyway.” Guy-Manuel blushes at that, he had never imagined himself in that way, Thomas practically described him as a temptress. Well, if that’s how Thomas saw it, he may stay this way. For Thomas, his love who was smiling down at him with adoration written all over his face, he would do anything.

 

As though sensing his line of thought, Thomas added, “Imagine losing all that because you wanted to look good. You are so perfect already, just the way you are…by doing all this you’re making yourself ugly instead. Why did you think that I just HAD to have you at that club, CRAVED you? Or want you so much now? Because you’re the most beautiful and perfect thing I’ve ever seen in my life. You don’t even have to make an effort, love, you drive me crazy, Guy-Manuel, and I want you so bad that if I didn’t have you, I’d grow mad with despair. I’m so lucky I am the one who got you all to myself. And I want all of you, naturally you, even all those extra fat you claim to have, because that’s how you were when I fell for you.” Guy-Manuel was melting like butter on a hot pan over a stove. Thomas just knew all the right words to make him feel better, to somehow believe that he was fine the way he was.

 

Guy-Manuel paused for a while. ‘When I fell for you…?’ He blushed even harder at that, at the notion that Thomas actually loved him. He wanted to ask what Thomas meant by saying that, but decided that he was too shy to be so direct. Thomas stood up and took the tray of breakfast. There were two thick slices of baguette, lightly toasted with some strawberry jam on it, a small bowl of fresh berries and hot chocolate. “It’s just a little bit of butter on the toast, and you can’t tell me that fruit will make you fat. That’s low fat milk in the hot chocolate, so no worries, take your time and try to eat as much as you can”, Thomas tell him and promptly picks up a strawberry and brings it to Guy-Manuel’s mouth, feeding him the little red fruit.

 

Guy-Manuel took a little bite off the strawberry and smiled, closing his eyes to savor the taste of the fruit. Sweet, juicy and a hint of tart, just perfect. After having a few blueberries, Guy-Manuel started wolfing down his food, suddenly feeling extremely hungry. He tried to stop, but he could not, he just wanted to eat and eat. The plate of breakfast was polished off in mere minutes. “You see?” Guy-Manuel whined in anguish, “when I start eating, I get so hungry that I just stuff it all down my stomach! I can’t control myself, I just keep on stuffing my mouth with more than I should eat. I just get so hungry and I can’t stop myself even though I know I’m eating too much.” Thomas’ eyes widened at that. “But that’s because you’re starving yourself in the first place!” Thomas tells his love gently. “Your body needs proper meals to get energy to function, but you refuse to eat and that makes your body hungry all the time. Even when you do eat, you throw it back up so your body still don’t get nearly enough food, leaving it starved. Of course you will wolf down whatever is in front of you, you are always hungry, just that you don’t notice it or stopped caring.” Thomas’ tone was gentle but serious.

 

Guy-Manuel hummed as he picked up his hot chocolate to sip on it. He never really looked at it that way before. Reluctantly, he admitted that Thomas had a point. Thomas passed him two tablets, muttering a “Paracetamol for the fever.” Guy-Manuel popped the pills and downed the rest of his hot chocolate, licked his lips then wiped his mouth on the sleeve of his pajama shirt. Thomas smiled, happy that he managed to get Guy-Manuel to eat something, even though it was far too little food than what an adult should eat for his breakfast. This morning, he called up his trusted housekeeper to ask advice on how to deal with this situation. When he explained the problem to Carla, she scolded him for over reacting and yelling at Guy-Manuel. “Don’t scold him, you’ll make him feel worse. Get him to start eating regular meals first, and then slowly increase the portions. You can’t get him to kick the habit and be normal overnight, Sir”, her voice rang out loud and clear over the phone.

 

Guy-Manuel’s yawn snapped Thomas out of his reverie. “You tired?” he asks, to which Guy-Manuel nodded, whispering “I’m still sleepy”. Thomas tucks Guy-Manuel back into bed and kisses his forehead, both his cheeks and lips. “Sleep well and sweet dreams, darling. I will wake you in time for lunch.” Guy-Manuel inwardly groaned at the thought of having to eat again, but outwardly he just nodded and closed his eyes again, not wanting to upset Thomas. Seeing Guy-Manuel rapidly falling asleep again, Thomas went to sit at the study table, wanting to keep an eye on Guy-Manuel. He didn’t want to give Guy-Manuel any chance to hurl out whatever he has eaten and Thomas had decided if he has to watch Guy-Manuel with a hawk’s eye, so be it. Thomas booted up and laptop and moved to get some work done.

 

*******************

 

Mary Bangalter strolled into her son’s house, looking worried. Her husband Daniel had told her that their son had taken a sick day, so being the concerned mother she was, she decided to come over to check on him. Coming with the intention of taking care of her son while he was ill, she was shocked to find that her son wasn’t home at all. She sighed as she sat on the plush red and black sofa in the hall. Carla was making porridge, the type you gave sick people, to be carted off by Liam to an unknown destination where her son currently was. Apparently, Thomas himself was not sick, instead he was taking care of a sickly friend. Mary grew confused. Her son Thomas was one who didn’t have many friends he’d care about, not one to really get into interpersonal relationships and Julian, his only friend in the world was strolling around the office just fine today….

 

“Who is this he’s taking care of? Thomas normally doesn’t bother about others, he doesn’t even have real friends that he care about other than Julian, so who is this that Thomas has run off to nurse on a whim?” Mary asks Carla. Carla’s mind works furiously, going into careful mode. To buy time to formulate an answer she started moving around the kitchen hurriedly to try and avoid answering the question, which served to make Mary more curious. She stood up from the couch, walked towards Carla and looked her in the eye. “Look here, you and I both know that Thomas is generally not a person who cares, about anybody else, he’s all business, all the time. There’s hardly anyone besides Julian take he’d care about, so this person must be special to him.” Carla just sighed, wondering whether she should tell Thomas’ mother about his new love.

 

Suddenly a thought struck Mary’s mind. One that made her smile, for it was a rare occurrence, one that she had lost hope in. “He’s taking care of a sick person, making sure he or she gets proper food and all…sounds like he cares deeply about this person? A lover perhaps?” Mary tries coaxing information from Carla. Carla gives a small smile and says, “You get the idea, Madam. He went there last night then called me this morning to prepare food for this person, apparently sir Thomas caused him a lot of distress and this person cried himself to sleep and all...sir said he felt guilty and wanted to nurse him back to health.”

 

“Ahhh, argues, crying and consoling. You’re right, I get the idea. I guess Thomas doesn’t want anyone to know? That’s why you are so secretive?” Mary asks for confirmation. She knows that her son can be difficult at times and didn’t want to put the sweet old maid into trouble for telling her things. Carla just nods at that. Mary’s face brightens up with a smile. “He or she? Cute person? I won’t get you into trouble, I just wanna know. I gave up hope on Thomas finding somebody a long time ago, I get worried about him at times. I was afraid my son wanted to fool with one night stands forever than actually finding somebody for once”, Mary supplies.

 

Carla, understanding Mary, being a mother herself, decided to put Mary’s worries to rest. ‘It’s just hints, right? Any assumptions Mary makes on her own is not my fault’ Carla decides in her head. “He brought this one home, so that says a lot, cause he never brings anyone here. It’s a he, a very cute and innocent looking young boy, very shy and Thomas seemed enrapture by him, given the way he was looking at him over breakfast yesterday.” Mary purses her lips. ‘My son has a love interest…I must do my own investigation’, she muses before smiling at Carla and reassuring her, “This stays between us, don’t worry. I’ll make sure Thomas can’t blame anything on you. This is a mum to mum pact, ok?” Carla just lets out a relieved breath at that before nodding.

 

Mary leaves the condominium feeling bubbly, like she was a teenager trying to hook a friend up, focused and with a goal in mind. She is going to find out who this special person was, an she was going to make sure that Thomas didn’t screw this up. She pulls out her hand phone. “Yes, hello Liam. I need your help in something…”

 

************

 

Guy-Manuel yawns then stretches like a cat on his bed. He’s well rested and refreshed, his mood is uplifted further when he turns his head and sees Thomas sitting at the study table in the room, concentrating on his work. He takes a minute just to scrutinize Thomas’ features, his soft curly hair that sat gingerly atop his head, his thick brows furrowed in concentration, his prominent nose, and his full, plump lips. Thomas turns his head around, feeling Guy-Manuel’s gaze on him. He saved his work, put his laptop on sleep mode then closed it. “Are you feeling better? I checked your temperature while you were sleeping, the fever seems to have settled down”, Thomas says as he walks towards the bed and starts feeling Guy-Manuel’s forehead for any traces of a fever.

 

Guy-Manuel just smiles at Thomas, a silent ‘I’m fine, don’t worry’. Thomas takes one of Guy-Manuel’s hands in his then kisses it. “You should shower and brush your teeth. It’ll make you feel fresh. Carla made some chicken porridge for you, which will be your lunch. Is there anything else you want to eat?” Thomas asks as he caresses Guy-Manuel’s hand with his own gently. Guy-Manuel wakes up and shook his head before hugging Thomas tightly, trying to show his appreciation of Thomas’ efforts to take care of his wellbeing. “Thank you for caring. It means so much to me”, he whispered against Thomas’ shoulder, just loud enough for him to hear. “Anything for you, dear. Now go get freshened up as I heat up your food. I already picked a few movies to watch later if you don’t mind.” Thomas gets up, pulling Guy-Manuel up to stand gently also.

 

Guy-Manuel smiles radiantly at Thomas, tip toes to kiss Thomas softly on the cheek, and then get his towel and toiletries basket from the corner of the room. “I’ll go shower now. You can just heat up the food in the microwave”, Guy-Manuel informs Thomas before sauntering out to the bathroom. Thomas watched as Guy-Manuel sashayed out, his ass peachy and accentuated by the soft falling fabric of his pajamas. “I’ll be dammed...how the hell did he even get the idea that he’s ugly? His body is divine” Thomas mutters to himself before taking the small Tupperware of porridge and stuffing it into the microwave.

 

Soon enough, Guy-Manuel appears from the shower, in another pair of pajamas and his wet hair plastered to his head. Seeing Guy-Manuel taking the hairdryer, Thomas quickly offers, “Can I help you dry your hair? If you don’t mind, that is.” “No, I don’t”, came the reply as Guy-Manuel handed Thomas the hairdryer, sitting down at the edge of his bed.

Drying Guy-Manuel’s hair was a joy for Thomas. He carded through his thick hair, it was soft and smelled fragrant shampoo, drying it in sections and watched as the hair turned lighter in color, from almost black to a light chocolaty hue as it dried. Guy-Manuel hummed happily, content of being treated like royalty by Thomas. Turning off the hairdryer, Thomas grabbed a hair brush and started combing Guy-Manuel’s hair to remove it of tangles. Finished, Thomas put the brush aside and asked, “Do you like jammies? You seem to be wearing them a lot at home.” Guy-Manuel nods excitedly and hops off the bed to skip towards his cupboard.

 

“I love jammies, they are so comfy. When I am home, I just change from a pair to another”, he opens the cupboard, revealing a mountain of neatly folded pajamas, “I have a whole section of my cupboard dedicated to them.” Thomas laughs merrily at that, making Guy-Manuel frown. “It’s childish I know, most guys just walk around in boxers or stuff like that but I find my jammies comfy”, he said, fingers playing at the hem of his pajama shirt, slightly embarrassed. “I find them cute”, Thomas laughed, much to Guy-Manuel’s surprise and added, “and I like that you cover up anyway, I would get really jealous if your flat mates had the chance to ogle you all day when I cant.”

 

“Oh well…shall we go get lunch and watch a movie?” Guy-Manuel tried to steer the conversation to less embarrassing waters. “The food’s on the table”, Thomas supplies as he walked towards the dining table. Thomas himself had Carla make him spaghetti aioli for lunch and dinner, and heartily begin tucking into his food. Guy-Manuel ate somewhat reluctantly, but he dared not to object to having to eat properly, determined to make Thomas happy. Thomas finished his meal first, and then watched Guy-Manuel like a hawk as he finished his meal. It was not much, but Guy-Manuel was having difficulty keeping his food down, not used to having a proper lunch at all, thus he ate slowly lest it all came back out again.

 

Thomas clapped happily when Guy-Manuel swallowed his last spoon of porridge, making Guy-Manuel smile. “What movies did you pick out?” Guy-Manuel asks after they were done with the dishes and settled in the couch to spend the rest of the afternoon watching movies together. “I thought some comedy to lighten up the mood, so how about classic Austin Powers?” Guy-Manuel nodded excitedly at that, chirping, “It’s one of my favorites! What else do you have in mind?” Thomas gave a shy smile before saying, “Bridget Jones? I wanted to watch a romantic comedy with you, given that we are together and all, you know? If you don’t mind.” Guy-Manuel gave a shy smile back, moving his eyes downcast and letting out a soft, “I’d love to.”

 

After Thomas sets up the DVD player, he settles in the couch beside Guy-Manuel, cuddling him. Guy-Manuel rests his head on Thomas’ chest, while Thomas winds his arm around Guy-Manuel’s waist and rests it on his upper thigh. They watch the Austin Powers together, laughing merrily, chattering and playfully passing snide remarks when they didn’t agree on how a scene went about. When the romantic comedy came on, they watched in compatible silence instead, savoring the moment of togetherness between them. Guy-Manuel sighs and relaxes into Thomas’ side, folding up his legs sideways onto the couch as he got really comfy while Thomas just wound his arm around Guy-Manuel tighter, drawing him impossibly closer to him. Somewhere in the middle of the movie, Thomas takes hold of Guy-Manuel’s hand, lacing their fingers together. Guy-Manuel looks up at that, giving Thomas a chance to kiss him oh-so-sweetly, lovingly on his lips, giving Guy-Manuel goose bumps.

 

For once in his life, Guy-Manuel was starting to believe with all of his heart that somebody really did love him just the way he was, that he was already perfect in Thomas eyes just being himself, so that’s how he should stay, in all chubbiness and shyness galore.

 

And Thomas wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 8: WARNINGS AND GETAWAYS**

Guy-Manuel was sitting in Thomas’ lap, giggling away as Thomas tickled his sides. “Oh, will you let me feed you now?” Thomas asks between laughs before hugging Guy-Manuel tightly from behind, nuzzling his neck lovingly. They were hidden away in the basement, where the generators were. It was a full two months since the day where Thomas showed up unexpectedly at Guy-Manuel’s flat and cared for him through his fever. Blissful from spending a whole day in a little bubble alone with his love, Thomas was not so keen to return to the real world where their hectic lives separated the two. Unfortunately, Monday ended and Tuesday came along with them being in separate places but in the same office building, with no chance to see each other.

 

Thomas ached constantly to see his love, knowing that he was working only three floors below his office, messaging his phone or calling him for quick, hushed words of affection only left him in hunger for more. Eventually, he got his paws on a blueprint of the office building and began hunting for a spot that was rarely used, or even better, not used at all. The aim was to find a secret haven where he could steal some precious moments alone with his boyfriend, a place nobody important (Daniel Bangalter, mostly) could find them by accident. The answer? The basement where the generators were. There was no reason for anybody to go down there unless there was a power out, and Thomas bribed the guard to keep quiet about his sneaking around.

 

Thomas got an inflatable mattress and covered it with a silken green duvet for them to rest on. He also got various battery powered lamps to lighten up the place and give it a romantic setting. In fact, one of the lamps also had a perfume dispenser which gave out a fresh, grassy scent. This was their utopia, their little getaway during the busy weekdays. When their schedule allowed it, anyway. Mostly, they had difficulty finding a slot of time that they were both free and days went by where they could not meet at all. This Friday was one of the days where they were sure that they could spend the whole lunch hour together, and Thomas was savoring every moment of it. Guy-Manuel had gotten a sandwich from Subway for lunch and Thomas had sent his PA to go get fish and chips from the nearby market place (poor sod was literally his slave).

 

As usual, Guy-Manuel was being difficult. They have established a routine where Guy-Manuel tried his level best to not eat or eat as little as possible while Thomas nagged him. Today was no different, Guy-Manuel ate only half of his sandwich and then put it down back on the wrapper, promptly lying down on his back on the mattress, clearly not wanting to eat any more of it. Thomas, ever the romantic, was inspired by the situation immediately. He tore off a small section and brought it to Guy-Manuel’s lips, attempting to feed him. Much to his dismay, Guy-Manuel clamped his lips together and shook his head, refusing to open his mouth. When Thomas shot him a questioning look, he just pouted stubbornly.

 

Not giving up, Thomas said, “Come on, darling, it’s only a six inch sandwich. You only had coffee for breakfast”, Guy-Manuel attempted to protest at this, a lie already on his tongue, but was cut off. “Pharrell reports to me, so don’t even think of lying. I won’t let you get away with eating so little food you know, so come on now, open up.” Guy-Manuel turned on his side, away from Thomas angrily. “Yeah I forgot you guys have a pact on making me eat”, Guy-Manuel said as he turned his back to Thomas completely, his fingers playing with the edge of the duvet. He was starting to discover that having a boyfriend, especially one as attentive as Thomas can be irritating at times. He felt smothered, suffocated even by Thomas’ antics. Thomas monitored his habits like a hawk, making sure he ate enough, slept on time at night and even got him to exercise. To make it worse, Pharrell and Pedro shared his point of view, which was that he needed some straightening out when it came to his own wellbeing, thus there was no escape for him from their watchful eyes.

 

He wanted to leash out and shout at them to leave him alone, but deep down inside he knew that they did it because they cared about him. He would never forget what happened two weeks ago after their movie session. His ears still ringed from Thomas’ shouts. Thomas had ordered in pizza that evening and they ate as they joked around. It was a happy evening in all, Guy-Manuel felt all warm and fuzzy with Thomas slathering all his attention on him, but he slipped up. Feeling slightly apprehensive of all that grease he’d downed with the pizza, Guy-Manuel had sneaked off to the toilet when he thought Thomas was asleep.

 

He was just about to hurl while crouched down near the toilet bowl when Thomas grabbed him from behind, his strong hands around his torso, lifting him up and effectively disrupting his hurling session. He trashed around, screaming, wanting to be released until he felt Thomas smack him hard across the face. “I’m not letting you do this to yourself!” Thomas shouted at him. He was oozing anger out of every fiber of his being, radiating out with pure energy. Guy-Manuel was so scared he didn’t dare to look at him. Seeing Guy-Manuel afraid, Thomas inhaled deeply to steady himself then cupped his love’s face gently. Guy-Manuel flinched, afraid of being hit again. Thomas eyes filled with self-hate when he saw Guy-Manuel’s reaction. He kissed Guy-Manuel chastely before pulling him into a hug. Guy-Manuel immediately leaned into his body, wanting to let Thomas’ body warmth give him comfort.

 

“I’m so sorry I hit you, oh god, I hurt you…” Thomas mumbled over and over again. Guy-Manuel sighed against Thomas chest before admitting, “I can’t blame you, really. I know my habits are infuriating. My mother has smacked me quite a few times before too.” Thomas lets go of Guy-Manuel, surprised at his admission. “What?” he managed. Guy-Manuel closed his eyes and blurted, “My mum knows, knew ever since it started. She has tried over and over again through the years, at times her patience wears thin and she smacks me, throws plates and toiletries at me even, and yanks my hair too.” “Then why won’t you stop? You know that it’s bad and it’s worrying those around you, so why still do it?” Guy-Manuel hung his head in shame at that. “I just can’t. I’m not strong enough. It’s like…like an addiction of some kind. It hurts me too, but I still can’t stop. Bear with me, please Thomas? Please?”

 

Hearing Guy-Manuel plead like this, his voice small and quivering, that broke Thomas’ heart. He nodded, his anger gone, kissed his love again, and then led him back to the bedroom where he settled in to sleep beside him, hugging him tightly. The next day, Pharrell, Pedro and Thomas had decided that if he was not strong enough to ditch the habit on his own, they would lend him strength. Thomas was determined to succeed where his mother had failed for years. He now took Guy-Manuel’s wellbeing as a personal mission, keeping tabs on him all the time and nagging him when he slacked off.

 

Guy-Manuel felt sad when he recalled that, he hated making Thomas angry. He hated the fact that he was making Thomas worry even now, by not eating the damm sandwich. More of all, he was angry with himself for being so weak, for harming himself by not eating. Thomas, sensing sadness coming from his lover, decided to put the morsel of food down and moved to pull Guy-Manuel up into his lap. Guy-Manuel easily complied, leaning his back against Thomas’ chest. “I’m sorry I made you sad, I know you feel sensitive about that”, Thomas kisses the crown of his head, “I’m so, so sorry”, kisses his cheek. Guy-Manuel just remained silent, much to Thomas’ dismay. “Well, I don’t like so see you sad, so…” Thomas said playfully before he started tickling his lover, jabbing his fingers into his sides.

 

Guy-Manuel squealed and laughed merrily, his face becoming pink as he grew out of breath. “Ahhh! Thomas, stop it! I’ll eat! I’ll eat!” Guy-Manuel shouted between bursts of laughter. “That’s much better”, Thomas grabbed his face and kissed him, swallowing his laughter. Guy-Manuel sighed and leaned into the kiss. When they broke off, Guy-Manuel kept his eyes closed, content. “I’ll feed you”, Thomas whispered then picked up the tiny morsel from earlier and began feeding Guy-Manuel. Somehow, Guy-Manuel felt that the sandwich had gotten much tastier now that Thomas was feeding him. When Guy-Manuel finished, Thomas wiped the condiments from the corner of his mouth with his thumb, then brought it to his own mouth to lick then suck it.

 

“Do you have to do things like that? Now that image will be in my head all day long”, Guy-Manuel looked back at Thomas and asked. Thomas just gave him a sly grin and replied, “It’s Friday, hun. We can be alone for the weekend after this, so you can ask me to do whatever you want. That includes making you scream while coming in my mouth.” Guy-Manuel blushed at that. Weekdays were hectic and they hardly saw each other, but the weekend was theirs and theirs alone. They went on dates all over town, visiting art galleries, cinemas and sharing ice cream in the park. They held hands everywhere they went like love struck teenagers on a summer date. The nights however, were filled with heady passion. Though they didn’t really go all the way yet, as Thomas was aware that Guy-Manuel was very shy and that he wasn’t ready, so Thomas he didn’t want to push it. But they still mutually masturbated and gave each other hand jobs or blow jobs to let go of the sexual steam before cuddling and spooning in bed.

 

“I wonder where are you taking me…I don’t like waiting like this”, Guy-Manuel whined, trying to coax Thomas into telling him his plans for the weekend. Thomas planned a getaway for them, a surprise for Guy-Manuel. He kept Guy-Manuel in the dark, only telling him to pack clothes for the weekend and bring it along today, as they will be leaving to their getaway straight after work. “You will know soon, my darling, just be patient a little longer. It’ll be good, I promise”, Thomas whispered gently blowing gently into Guy-Manuel’s ear. Guy-Manuel smiled at that, he couldn’t wait to reach there. Suddenly, Thomas’ handphone blared, the alarm signaling that it was time to go.

 

Thomas let go of his love reluctantly, wanting to spend more time with him. As Thomas switched off the lamps, Guy-Manuel straightened his shirt and combed his hair, tying half of it into a pony tail. They nodded at the guard who just smirked at them, before climbing the stairs to the first floor. Just as Guy-Manuel moved away, Thomas pulled him back to give him a quick peck on the lips, a “See you, love” whispered between them. Guy-Manuel just grinned foolishly before nodding and walking quickly away. Thomas watched his sweetheart disappear into an alleyway before walking away himself. Little did he know that there was another young man watching them with contempt on his face, and that a storm of trouble would be soon heading his way.

 

**************

 

“Ok, I’m definitely ready to get out of here and drink the night away”, Ellie huffs tiredly as she packed her briefcase. Valarie just shrugged and chided, “We have kids to go home to, Ellie, those days are over for us. Well, the young ones like Guy could very well enjoy their weekends, right Guy?” Guy-Manuel looks up at Valarie and smiled. “You looked exited the whole day, is it a girl you’re waiting to meet?” Sam pokes. Guy-Manuel blushes and lets out a strangled “A-a-no one-re-really…”, making the others laugh. Had he really been that transparent? Ellie pets Guy-Manuel’s head lovingly. “Young love…so sweet and cute”, Ellie said as she pinched Guy-Manuel’s cheek and walked out.

 

Guy-Manuel continued packing his things slowly, waiting for the people to leave until only he and Valarie was left. She looked around, making sure that there was nobody else around before she closed the door and grabbed Guy-Manuel by the shoulders, a stern look on her face. “Look, there was a reason why I asked you that question earlier.” Guy-Manuel just gaped at her. Why was she so serious? Normally she was fun and happy going but she looked like she meant business right now. “You don’t have to tell me, I know. Look here. I’ve been working here for a very long time and there are a lot of things I know, especially about the boss’ family. You are young and innocent, so I’m warning you. I usually don’t bother at all, but you’re such a sweet boy so I have to.”

 

Guy-Manuel looked at her, dread pooling in his stomach. This was not going to be good. “Save yourself before you get hurt real bad, my boy. Don’t get into things that you can’t handle later on”, she said, letting go of Guy-Manuel’s shoulders and leaving the office. Guy-Manuel just stood there, speechless. Valarie was talking about Thomas, she had to be. Why else ask about his plans for the weekend or mention Thomas’ family? He suddenly felt cold all over. What did Valarie know that he did not? He sat down abruptly, a thousand thoughts flying around his head. His phone bleeped and he took it out to see that Thomas had messaged him. ‘Where are you? Waiting for you at the bus stop.’

 

Guy-Manuel closed his eyes and tried to compose himself. Maybe Valarie heard things about Thomas. In fact, he himself knew that Thomas is an overbearing and possessive person, at times demanding, he was experiencing that first hand. But wasn’t that what a boyfriend did anyway? Thomas felt possessive over Guy-Manuel because, well…Guy-Manuel was his. Thomas had not been doing anything bad to him, if anything at all, Thomas had been caring and loving in dealing with all of his issues. Why would Thomas bother to spend so much effort on trying to get Guy-Manuel healthier if he didn’t care? He was making Guy-Manuel’s life hell by literally stalking him ALL the time, which had to show some serious determination from Thomas.

 

Guy-Manuel pushed Valarie’s warnings to the back of his mind. Thomas cared for him and he knew it, felt it in his bones. He didn’t care about whatever anybody told him about Thomas, in these two months that they were together, he had grown to need Thomas in his life as much as he needed air to breath. He typed back his reply quickly, before walking out the office towards the bus stop. ‘Will be there soon, on my way.’

 

**************

 

“Wow”, Guy-Manuel gaped at the private jet at the airport. “Yup, we are going there by a jet first, only then driving out to the place. First part of your surprise”, Thomas said before he kissed Guy-Manuel’s cheek and wound his arm around his waist, walking with him to the luxurious looking jet. When Guy-Manuel slid into Thomas’ car, the first thing he had asked was “So, tell me. Where are we going?”, making Thomas laugh. “Patience, darling, patience”, Thomas told him before hugging him tightly. Guy-Manuel sat in the car, fidgeting with excitement. He was puzzled when they reached the airstrip, but now he was just blown out of his mind.

 

The interior of the jet was beautifully furnished, all polished wood and cream leather seats. They sat face to face at a small island, Guy-Manuel just looking slacked-jawed at his surroundings. “If you’re wondering where this came from”, Thomas waved his hand around, “ It belongs to my family. We’re quite rich, you know.” Guy-Manuel groaned. He forgot that Thomas was the heir to a very successful company and that he was filthy rich. Guy-Manuel suddenly felt very, very inferior. Somehow, Valarie’s words surfaced to his mind again. He shook his head, trying to get rid of those unsettling thoughts. Thomas held his hands, rubbing soothing circles with his thumb. “It’s ok. I spend on you because you’re my darling and you deserve to be pampered like the prince you are. I consider it my duty to only give you the best”, Thomas says, squeezing his hand to reassure him. Guy-Manuel gives him a weak smile in return.

 

A stewardess in a navy blue uniform comes in and tells them that dinner will be served in five minutes. Seeing that Guy-Manuel was still disturbed by something, he brought his hand to his lips and kissed each of his fingers tenderly, making Guy-Manuel blush. When their dinner arrives, which was duck comfit with a warm potato salad, Guy-Manuel dug in enthusiastically, all worry gone and replaced with excitement. They landed some time later, it was dark by then and Guy-Manuel found it hard to guess where he was as he couldn’t see anything clearly. “Just a little longer”, Thomas said softly as they walked towards a four wheel drive and drove off.

 

They drove on, Guy-Manuel feeling his anticipation suffocating him until they reached a tall iron gate. As they rolled in the driveway, Guy-Manuel could see a small ancient mansion, ivy creeping over it. “We’re in the country?” Guy-Manuel looks back at Thomas and asks. Thomas looked extremely proud of himself, puffing out his chest. “Yes, darling. There’s a farm, a honey bee house, gardens and all sorts of things for us to see here. Far away from the noise of the city.” Guy-Manuel squealed in delight. “Oh, thank you, thankyouthankyou!” he practically screamed as he opened the door and literally ran to the main door of their accommodation. It was an old mansion which was converted into a bed and breakfast, and Thomas had booked the couple’s suite on the third floor.

 

The room was exquisite, decorated with antique furniture with a huge bed. Thomas points towards the bed, a small blue box was on it. “For you”, Thomas whispered. Guy-Manuel sat on the bed and opened the box to see a pair of sheer periwinkle blue pajamas in it. When he touched it, he noticed that it was made of the finest silk, soft against his hands. It even came with a dressing gown which had beautiful lace trimming on it and a pair of fuzzy bedroom slippers. It must have cost a fortune. “Do you like it? I want you to wear this and sleep tonight”, Thomas asked him, nervous. Guy-Manuel didn’t reply, just nodded gently.

 

“I’m gonna go shower and brush my teeth”, Guy-Manuel heard Thomas announce. He just sat there, lost in thoughts and silently contemplating his desires. He was so lost that he barely registered when Thomas came out and told him to go take his shower. Guy-Manuel grabbed his new nighty collection and stepped into the bathroom. As Guy-Manuel was taking his shower, Thomas waited anxiously outside on the balcony. He hoped he had not overdone it, getting a tailored made night outfit for his boyfriend. He was imagining how his sweetheart would look in it, all shy and beautiful.

 

Thomas looked back when he heard approaching footsteps. Guy-Manuel smelled like jasmine, courtesy of the shower gel, his hair still damp. His eyes were downcast as he stepped into the balcony. Thomas felt his breath go away all at once. Guy-Manuel looked ethereal, a beauty beyond words. The periwinkle blue of the pajama brought out the color of his eyes, making them look vivid. The moonlight made his skin glow, fair and unblemished and his cheeks were a rosy hue, his lips soft and dewy like a rose petal. Guy-Manuel removed his dressing gown and placed it on the chair. Thomas felt his chest tighten further. The soft silk of the pajama fell perfectly around his body, accentuating his curves. The sheer material added to the allure, just a sight hint of the miles of unblemished soft skin underneath.

 

“Are you satisfied with what you see, love?” Guy-Manuel whispers so slow, it almost went unheard. Thomas grabbed his hips and brought him close. “More than satisfied, darling, you are absolutely beautiful. You look like a fair angel to me.” Thomas was whispering against Guy-Manuel’s lips, just about kissing him. Guy-Manuel looked up at Thomas through his lashes. “Am I truly that perfect in your eyes?” he whispered back. Thomas grazes his lover’s lips gently before whispering back, “You are the most perfect being in this world to me. You are a siren that drives me mad. Your every move enchants me, ensnares my mind, darling.”

 

Guy-Manuel felt powerful, more powerful than he ever had in his life. He felt beautiful, confident and he truly believed that Thomas was totally enraptured by him, given the way he was looking at him right now. Guy-Manuel bit his lip and took a step back. He was feeling very daring all of a sudden and he wanted Thomas right now, worshiping his body. “Then why have you not taken me? I am yours, all yours but yet you always hold back from completely claiming me.” Thomas was shocked. Guy-Manuel was staring wantonly at him, tempting him into fulfilling his deepest desires.

 

Guy-Manuel ran a hand down his torso seductively while licking his lips. “Tell me, Thomas. Will you make me mine? Or will I wither away in thirst of unrequited desire?” Thomas pounced, grabbing his lover and kissing him roughly. “I want you more than anything, my sweet love. I wanna ravish that lithe body until you scream my name. Don’t temp me unless you are ready, my love. I have only been holding back because I know you are painfully shy, being the sweet innocent angel you are. Invite me and I shall drink from your sweet nectar with abandon, honey.”

 

Guy-Manuel shivered at Thomas words. He was aroused and he wanted this. He had wanted it since that morning so long ago where Thomas first touched him but he was too shy to ask for it. But seeing Thomas look at him like that, something snapped in him and he could not hold back anymore. His soul was yearning for this and he let the words spill. “Then come take what you want, I am growing weary of wanting to be one with you, to feel you inside me”, Guy-Manuel drawled seductively before walking back to the bedroom, disappearing behind the curtains. Thomas took a deep breath. He was going to make love to his sweet, sweet angel, they would truly be one after this. Thomas stepped in and closed the sliding door and drew the curtains before going to look for his lover to make love to him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 9: LOVE, LOVE, LOVE**

Guy-Manuel walked across the bedroom to the pantry hurriedly, his heart still pounding like mad in his chest. He could not believe that he was so brazen to have told Thomas what he had actually wanted all along, given that his lack of confidence always stalled him. In the many times that they had messed around in bed before, he had always felt like moaning out “Thomas just fuck me” or “Thomas I need more”, but his nerves got the better of him. He poured himself some water, he was not thirsty but his hands were shaking so bad he just to have something to do with them. He put the jug down and closed his eyes, steadying himself. He knows that Thomas will come after him soon. Just the thought that he’s about to lose his virginity and give all of him to Thomas was scaring him already. But now there was no going back, he’d gone and told Thomas what he wanted, and give it to him Thomas will.

 

In a way, he was glad it is going to be Thomas. His first time would be with somebody who cared for him deeply. Guy-Manuel had been thinking about the way Thomas took care of him, was devoted to him (though it annoyed him at times) and the way he was patient through his shyness. His first time would be with somebody who meant something to him, not just a hormone fueled teenage fumble in the back of a car somewhere. He was giving himself, dared he say it, to a person who he was growing to love. The thought of that made him feel warm and stifled the fear a little. Then there was the blue silken pajamas that made him feel so sexy. There was something about it that made him feel so good, he looked at his reflection in the mirror in the bath earlier and something in him told him that it was the right time, finally the time to just get on with it already and be one with his lover.

 

He was so lost in thought he did not hear the approaching footsteps. Thomas hugged him from behind, bringing him back from the depths of his mind. “Hmmm, why all quiet and shy suddenly, my love? You so daringly seduced me and asked me to come take you, but here you are, all quiet and hiding. Don’t tease me, darling, I have had too many dreams about you to stop halfway. If you are not sure just tell me now before I start because I will not be able to stop myself from ravishing you”, Thomas whispered, his breath warm against Guy-Manuel’s neck. Guy-Manuel sighed, relaxing and leaning back. “Take me, Thomas. I have dreamt of you too. Please understand that I am scared as hell, I have heard so many tales that this will hurt, and the plain thought that I will hand you my virtue makes me feel shy. But I want this, I want this so bad so don’t hesitate.” Guy-Manuel felt Thomas kiss his neck before Thomas turned him around and cupped his face, tilting it upwards so that he was looking directly into Thomas’ eyes.

 

“I won’t hurt you, not one bit. That’s the last thing I want to do, so I will be extremely gentle and careful with you. I may be taking your innocence, but I will be worshipping you. Your body is a temple I wanna pay homage to, appreciate its beauty and caress its gentleness, every inch of it.” Thomas’ words made Guy-Manuel blush. Unable to speak, he just nodded. Thomas smiled at him and released his face to take one of his hands and lead him to the main part of their room, which was a mini hall of some sort. By an open window sill, Thomas had laid down thick comforters, blankets and plush pillows, a small island bathed in soft moonlight. Thomas looks back at Guy-Manuel and says, “I wanna take you here, my love. Not just on some ordinary bed. You look so beautiful bathed in moonlight.”

 

Thomas sits and motions for Guy-Manuel to join him. “You may think that I am romanticizing this, gushing out words to swoon you, maybe paint a better picture for you but right now in this moment, I care about you more than anything else in this world. Even if we shall someday drift apart, you will always be special to me. I doubt that I will ever be able to find anybody else I treasure as much as I treasure you right now.” Breathing in deeply and steeling himself for his confession, Thomas takes both of Guy-Manuel’s hand in his, who was now smiling serenely at him. “I love you with every fiber of my being, Guilliaume Emmanuel Paul de Homem-Christo”, Guy-Manuel’s face turns into utter shock, “I think I loved you from the moment that I first saw you in that club, all alone in that corner. I never loved anybody truly before, as I love you now, and I doubt that I will ever love anybody as much as I love you in my life.” Guy-Manuel just stared at Thomas, his jaw hanging open. Thomas looked and sounded so sincere, so sure, that Guy-Manuel believed all that he said. He was astonished that somebody loved him that much, that deeply, that he felt the corners of is eyes prick with tears. “I wanna make love to you now. I wanna give my all to you as you give your all to me. I wanna be so close to you that not even the air can get between us. I wanna be yours as much as you’re mine. Most of all, I wanna be one with you and never let you go, ever.”

 

Those words did it. Guy-Manuel was so overcome with raw emotions that his tears just fell, freely flowing down his cheeks. If he was all warm before, he was positively on a cloud, flying around right now. He lunged forward and hugged Thomas so tight, he was practically squishing him. “Oh Thomas. I love you too. I love you so much. Make love to me and make me mine. Do it now. Let us be one and never to be separated again. Make me yours forever and ever more.” They just held each other for some time, reveling in the fact that they had found love in each other, precious, pure and untarnished. In a world filled with lies they have found truth in each other, which was so important that they will never let go of in their lives. They gently moved apart, Thomas gently wiping the tears away and Guy-Manuel laughing softly. “Kiss me”, Guy-Manuel asks, and Thomas happily obliges, kissing his lover like he was the air and that he will die if he let go.

 

Their tongues caressed as their hands moved all over, pawing everywhere. When they broke for air, Thomas removed his shirt and Guy-Manuel promptly put his palms on his chest, gently splaying his fingers through the rivulets of dark, curly hair resting on the pecks. As Guy-Manuel took his time to caress Thomas’ torso and shoulders, touching gently and leaving butterfly kisses on Thomas’ hard rock abs. Thomas was never gladder that he worked out that much. Thomas felt Guy-Manuel tug gently at the waistband of his sweatpants. He pulls his lover back up to kiss his nose gently and whisper a “Wait darling. This is not the night for rushing. Let me savor you first.” Thomas pushes Guy-Manuel back gently before unbuttoning his pajama top. Despite all the times that they have messed around, Thomas had never seen Guy-Manuel shirtless, his torso was one part of his body that he was so insecure about that he never let Thomas see.

 

Right now Guy-Manuel wasn’t protesting, he was biting his bottom lip nervously but he did not stop Thomas. Finished, Thomas pushed the blue silk away, getting it off. “I wanna see you, darling. All of you”, Thomas drawled seductive as he removed the top and put it aside. He was met with the sight of beautiful fair, unblemished skin, soft with a light dusting of chocolate hued hair and a pair of perky, rosy pink nipples. Guy-Manuel was slightly more filled out than Thomas, a little bit of chubbiness in his frame. Thomas couldn’t help staring. Guy-Manuel looked divine to him, half hidden in darkness, his hair mussed up and falling gently on his shoulders, his eyes dark with desire and his lips pink and swollen. Guy-Manuel, self-conscious of Thomas’ stare, immediately crossed his hands over his chest, attempting to shield himself from Thomas view, his head hung low. He was embarrassed, he suddenly felt like waking up and running away. ‘God, now he knows how fat I really am, I shouldn’t have let him remove the top’ he thought, ashamed of his larger frame. Thomas grabbed his wrists and tugged his hands gently away. “I don’t know why you are so insecure of yourself, darling, you are so gorgeous to me, so beautiful, so sexy! Don’t hide from me, please; I’ve wanted to see you for so long.” Guy-Manuel looks up at Thomas’ words, watching Thomas drink him in.

 

“Am I Ok to you, I am not fat and ugly to you, Thomas?” The insecurity in Guy-Manuel’s voice crushed Thomas. He looked at Guy-Manuel in wonder. “You are perfect to me, darling. You have no idea how beautiful you are, you are a vixen, my dearest. ” With those words, Thomas gently pushed Guy-Manuel to lie on his back. Wanting to distract his lover from unsettling thoughts, Thomas ran his hands up and down Guy-Manuel’s sides, before pinching a nipple. “Hey, that’s sensitive!” Guy-Manuel yelped then pouted in protest. “I know, that’s why I am torturing them, oh-so-sweetly”, Thomas tells him as he continued his torture of that nipple, pinching and rolling it between his fingers. Surrendering to the sensation, Guy-Manuel’s eyes flutters close. “I guess it’s not fair to leave the other one lonely, now is it?” Thomas asks playfully as he pinched the other nipple, while he bent down the take the already hard nub he was torturing earlier in to his mouth to suck it gently. “Ahhh”, Guy-Manuel moaned softly when he felt Thomas graze the bud with his teeth, moving his hand to card through Thomas’ curls.

 

Thomas tortured the nipples for a while before growing bored with them, looking for new flesh to savor. Trailing downwards, his breath ghosting over the pale skin, his interest was piqued when he approached Guy-Manuel’s navel. He dipped his tongue in, kissing and licking the skin there. He could hear Guy-Manuel moaning loudly, he was squirming beneath Thomas already. He hooked his fingers into the waistband of the pajamas and pulled them down and off, Guy-Manuel raising his hips to facilitate the process. Thomas, wanting to tease his lover more, trailed hot, open mouthed kisses on Guy-Manuel’s leg, moving up to nuzzle his inner thighs gently. Guy-Manuel groaned in frustration as Thomas started nipping around his inner thighs, sucking into the skin and leaving love bites everywhere, but refused to go where he badly wanted Thomas to be. “Tho-Thomas…don’t tease me so much..pl-please…” Guy-Manuel let out a strangled plea, making Thomas smirk before moving up north and kiss him thoroughly.

 

Mid-kiss, Thomas reaches between them to grab Guy-Manuel’s painfully hard erection and stroke it gently, making Guy-Manuel whimper into the kiss. Breaking the kiss, Thomas sat back up to better stroke his lover, teasing the head with his thumb. He was stroking and squeezing with just enough pressure to make his presence felt but not nearly enough to grant gratification. Guy-Manuel couldn’t take the torture anymore. “God dammit Thomas! Stop playing with me already, I’m going mad, I want more, I NEED more”, Guy-Manuel cried in desperation as he clutched the blanket below him. “Ok”, was all Thomas said as he let go of Guy-Manuel to wake up and walk to a nearby table. He returned with a small basket, one with a bottle of lube, a pack on condoms and wet tissues in it. Taking the bottle of lube, he says “I’m gonna prepare you now. Not so much longer anymore, be patient ok” as he squirts the lube onto his fingers and rubbed them together, warming it.

 

He gently inserted a finger into Guy-Manuel, pushing past the resistance. He took his time, moving slowly and carefully as to not hurt his lover. He continued stroking Guy-Manuel’s shaft to make him relaxed. When he felt Guy-Manuel yield slightly, he added a second finger and started scissoring gently, stretching him slowly. Guy-Manuel started trashing around, moving his hips to get Thomas’ fingers to go in deeper. Seeing this reaction, Thomas added a third finger and began brushing Guy-Manuel’s sweet spot. “Ah-ahhh!” Guy-Manuel’s back was arching off the comforter and he was screaming now. His whole body was so sensitive and he reached his hands to grab Thomas’s shoulders to garner his attention. “I’m ready. I want you inside me now, Thomas, take me now”, he begged, breathless, his voice a whisper in the wind. Thomas slipped his fingers out and caressed Guy-Manuel’s thighs in an attempt to calm him down. “Shush, shush, relax. Just a while more”, Thomas said as Guy-Manuel whined.

 

Thomas removes his sweatpants in one swift move and squirts more lube onto his hand, slicking himself up quickly. He could hear Guy-Manuel panting loudly, his breath erratic and he knew that his lover was needy and ready for him. Looking deeply into Guy-Manuel’s eyes, Thomas leans down to kiss his forehead, his cheeks, nose and finally his lips, calming him down a little. He sat himself between Guy-Manuel’s legs, rubbing himself gently against his lover’s entrance. He looks up at Guy-Manuel, takes one of his hands and kisses it tenderly. “Are you ready, my love?” Thomas asks. Guy-Manuel smiles and nods gently. Thomas was so nervous right now, it was like it was his first time all again. This was important to him, this was the moment where he would become one with the person who he loved.

 

Guy-Manuel’s heart was pounding so hard at this moment that he was afraid it might just burst out of his chest. He took deep breaths, trying to calm himself and relax. Thomas pushed in gently, pushing through the tight resistance slowly. “Uhmmm…”, Guy-Manuel closed his eyes shut, trying to stifle his scream by clamping his mouth shut, lips pressed tightly together. The warnings he had received from others were true. It hurt. It hurt a lot. But he also knew that he had to endure this to get to the pleasurable part, that the pain would go away eventually. “It’s ok, breath and relax babe. If you tense it will hurt more. I’m halfway in already.” Guy-Manuel tried his best to relax and let Thomas in, but he was hurting badly and he felt his eyes well up from the pain. Finally, he felt Thomas’ thighs hit his and he knew that Thomas was in as far as he could in this position. By now, Guy-Manuel was crying, unable to contain the pain.

 

Thomas leaned down to embrace his lover and Guy-Manuel hid his face in Thomas’ throat, sniffling. “Shush, shush, don’t cry. It will get better, I promise. I won’t move until you say, ok”, he whispered gently, feeling sorry for Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel just nodded, taking a moment to compose himself. He was scared of the pain, but how will he learn to let Thomas love him if he won’t even let him begin? How will he ever get used to making love if he won’t even try? With this in mind, Guy-Manuel tapped Thomas’ shoulder and said in a low voice, “You can start now. Just…just move slowly, Ok?” Thomas released his hold on Guy-Manuel and looked at him, his eyes affectionate. Guy-Manuel leaned up and kissed Thomas gently, encouraging him.

 

Thomas began by moving as slowly as possible, giving space for Guy-Manuel to relax and adjust. After a while the pain became considerably less, and Guy-Manuel started moving his hips in tandem to Thomas, urging Thomas to move faster. Thomas sat up and hooked Guy-Manuel’s legs over his shoulders, allowing him to go in deeper. He began to aim for Guy-Manuel’s sweet spot, and judging by the shower of moans spilling from Guy-Manuel’s lips, he was hitting it every time. Guy-Manuel’s mind began to haze over with an overload of sensation. The pleasure was growing by leaps and bounds now, a coil tightly wound in the pit of his stomach, diminishing the pain. In fact, he hardly felt the pain anymore, just a delicious burn and Thomas moved in and out.

 

Thomas was also overcome with sensations, Guy-Manuel was so tight and warm around him, driving him mad. He leaned down so that he could touch Guy-Manuel’s body, they were caressing each other with their hands all over at this point. Wanting to see Guy-Manuel better, he hoisted him up so that Guy-Manuel was sitting in his lap, riding him. Guy-Manuel suddenly felt unsure, didn’t know how to react to the sudden change of positions. Thomas kissed him passionately, biting his lower lips and sucking on it as he pushed up into Guy-Manuel. “Just ride babe. Like riding a horse, just move like how your body tells you too”, Thomas tells his lover between pants, his cheeks red and sweat lining his brow.

Guy-Manuel gave in to what his body wanted and moved his body up and down to meet Thomas halfway. Thomas was pounding into his lover with abandon, letting go. He had held himself back for so long, his restrain was depleted. Guy-Manuel was feeling divine, his body wound up unbelievably tight, making his close his eyes and opens his mouth, tilting his head back. Thomas felt that he looked absolutely beautiful like this, all undone and no barriers between them. Thomas leaned down, nipping and sucking at the juncture of Guy-Manuel’s neck. Guy-Manuel just placed both hands in Thomas’ curls, clutching and pulling them so hard it hurt Thomas’ scalp. Not that Thomas bothered, he was much too preoccupied at the time. “Tho-Thomas, I-I’m close…”, Guy-Manuel almost shouts.

 

They were completely lost in each other at this point. They moved as one, clutching each other so tight that they didn’t know where one ended and the other began. They were moving as their emotions and primal instincts were dictating, desperate to become so close to each other nothing would ever come between them again. Their yearning for each other eclipsed everything else right now, it became the nucleus of their lives and urged them to move closer towards completion. This was love, pure love, coursing through their veins and scorching their skin, enveloping them in a delicious heat and it was theirs to find and to hold on to, exclusively theirs. They were steadily climbing higher and higher, and right now they were so high, a place they’ve never been in their lives.

 

Thomas reached between them to stroke Guy-Manuel’s length with abandon, trying to get him over the edge. “Come for me, Guy-Manuel. Scream my name out loud when you come, scream it with all you have so that the whole world will know that you belong to me and me alone, that we are one and complete. Come on, my love!” That was it for Guy-Manuel. He screamed, “Ahhhh! Thomas!”, his throat horse as he let a high pitched strangled scream as he came, falling over the edge and hurtling down into bliss. Thomas felt Guy-Manuel clench him tightly as he came, long stripes of come shooting out between their bodies. ‘God, he’s so beautiful when he comes’ Thomas marvels. That sets Thomas off, and he came almost immediately after Guy-Manuel did, his orgasm bursting through his body violently as he came in his lover, marking him as his. They held each other as they whirlwind through their orgasm, as they came crumbling sweetly down from the intense height they reached together. They were lost in some oblivion somewhere, completion was finally theirs to savor.

 

Guy-Manuel slumped down, exhausted and incoherent, pulling Thomas down with him. They remained there, Guy-Manuel resting his head in Thomas’ chest and Thomas holding Guy-Manuel close to him as they came down slowly from their high. Eventually, after what felt like hours, Thomas finally shifted and pulled himself out of Guy-Manuel, reaching for the wet tissues. He cleaned himself and Guy-Manuel with outmost care, then tied up his condom and put it aside to bin it later along with the wet tissues.

 

Guy-Manuel’s breath was still erratic, but he looked calm and content, his eyes closed and a joyful look upon his face. Thomas carried him gently, moving him to the bed before going back to get their clothes. Guy-Manuel finally opened his eyes as Thomas slipped his sweatpants back on. “Good?” Thomas asked as he slid in beside Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel just smiled and nodded lazily, reaching to take his pajamas. “We should shower and all”, Thomas said, causing Guy-Manuel to groan. “I am too lazy to shower again and I just wanna sleep right now”, he said, yawning. Well, Thomas could see that that was true. Guy-Manuel sluggishly put his pajamas back on before flopping into bed, closing his eyes to sleep. Thomas scoots over, pulling Guy-Manuel into his arms. “Urmmm, comfy”, he hears Guy-Manuel purr sleepily. Thomas watches his lover fall into deep sleep, petting his thigh gently to lull him.

 

Thomas felt himself drifting to sleep too, content and tired after the long day. He now understood why they called it making love. He was always bewildered by the term, never able to see sex as something relatable to love. Sex had purely been for satisfying his lust all along. Now he finally understood why, after moving as one and the connection he had felt earlier, it was love pushing them to find and complete each other, their orgasm being the pinnacle of that electric connection. He smiled as he fell into the realm of sleep, giving Guy-Manuel one final kiss for the night on the crown of his head. He was finally sated, finally, his soul had found what he had been yearning for all these years.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 10: RED ROSE BY THE DRESSER**

Guy-Manuel was sleeping peacefully when Thomas’ phone blared, making him groan. He was extremely sleepy and the loud noise annoyed him to hell. He opened his eyes a fraction, it was still dark so it must have been very early in the morning still. Thomas petted him lovingly, telling him to go back to sleep and not to wait up for him as something came up and his dad needed him to settle it right away. Guy-Manuel went back to sleep as Thomas moved around the room to get dressed, falling asleep before Thomas left the room.

 

Guy-Manuel felt queasy after that, falling in and out of an uneasy sleep. His dreams felt so real, he could’ve sworn that people were talking near him, having hushed conversations. His mind was thick with sleep so he assumed he was dreaming, but vividly, the voices sounding as though there were people right beside him, watching him sleep. At one point, he even felt like he saw a woman sitting at the foot of his bed, touching his calf. Somehow, something he heard in those whispers shook him so bad that he awoke with a shock, rolling off the bed and hitting the floor, hard. He couldn’t remember what he heard, only that it was a warning of some sort meant for him. And that it spelled real danger. Based on the pinkish tint in the somewhat dark sky it was close to dawn. He felt scared as hell, his heart was pounding madly and his throat was dry. ‘A nightmare?’ he wondered.

 

But as he woke up from the floor, something caught his attention. The curtains were open by the tall windows leading up to the balcony, letting the pinkish morning light in. He was dead sure that he saw it closed before he slept last night. But if it was closed from the inside, it would be locked and only somebody from the inside could have opened it. He frowned in confusion. Maybe he was so beat last night that he saw it wrong. Maybe Thomas opened it before leaving. He didn’t know, he was too sleepy at that time. Remembering his dreams from earlier, the voices and the lady, he felt cold dread sweep over him. But he was all the way in the country and nobody knew where he was. Not even his flat mates. Who would want to watch him sleep anyway? If they had taken to the trouble of breaking in, they definitely would have stolen something or harmed him already as no one was crazy enough to break in just to watch somebody sleep. This was not Twilight where we have vampires who can’t sleep thus they have nothing better to do at night than to watch their girlfriend sleeping.

 

Just to be sure he went around the room, looking to see if anything was out of place. Everything looked as they left it. The only thing different was that there was a lone stalk of blood red rose on the dresser, along with a letter. Guy-Manuel frowned as he picked it up. The rose was fragrant, the bud in full bloom. Guy-Manuel didn’t remember seeing it there last night. He opened the letter and smiled as he saw that it was a note from Thomas, apologizing about him leaving and promising to be back as before breakfast. That he will settle this then spend the weekend with him without any interruptions. The letter was written in a flourish, in Thomas’ handwriting. Guessing that Thomas felt guilty and left him the note and rose, he put them back on the dresser. Guy-Manuel smiled, pushing his paranoia away with a breath of relieve. Thomas must have opened the window to let the morning breeze in. Shrugging off his fear, he closed the windows before going back to sleep. But somehow, a dread had fallen into a stomach, his instincts were screaming at him, telling him something was wrong, terribly wrong.

 

***************

 

The next time Guy-Manuel woke up, it was to the sight of Thomas leaning over him. In fact, it was Thomas who had woke him up, beads of water falling from his freshly washed hair onto Guy-Manuel’s face. Guy-Manuel smiled, wiping he drops of water on his face with the back of his hand. “Wow, waking me up with water from your wet hair, how sweet of you.” Thomas clearly just steeped out from the shower, he was all wet and in a white bath robe. Thomas smirked, straightening up and pointing at the clock on the wall, which showed 10.37. “It’s already late in the morning you know, you should wake up and shower and all. I will wait for you in the garden for breakfast. Just get one of the workers downstairs to bring you there”, Thomas said before blowing him a kiss and getting a towel to wipe his hair dry. Though restless from his disturbed sleep, he woke up, going to the bathroom to brush his teeth and shower.

 

Later, he stepped into the lobby, dressed in jeans and a white t-shirt with a picture of mashi maro on it (it was childish but he didn’t care one bit). Before he could ask for help, a young lady in uniform and blond hair neatly tied up in a ponytail came up to him and greeted him, telling him that Thomas was waiting in the private garden and she was to bring him there. Curious, Guy-Manuel asked her why the garden was ‘private’ as they walked together. “Like wasn’t places like gardens in places like this open for all guests?” he asked, making her laugh. “Mr. Bangalter didn’t tell you?” Guy-Manuel shook his head at that and a surprised “Oh!” came from the lady. Explaining, she told Guy-Manuel that the inn and farm actually belonged to the Bangalters. All the three suites on the third floor (one of them being the insanely large room where Thomas and Guy-Manuel were) and one of the four outdoor gardens were reserved only for members of the family and their guests, thus private. They had bought the farm and adjacent mansion from the previous owners a long time ago, even before Thomas was born, and converted the mansion into an inn and rented out the farm.

 

“This is Mr. Bangalter’s favorite getaway, and only he and Mr. Casablancas come here from the family. Bangalter senior have other places he is fond of, I guess”, she kept on explaining as they went out and followed a red bricked trail, leading up to an iron wrought gate. Behind it was the garden which also looked like a rustic forest, tall grey trees lining it. She opened the gate and just stood there, making Guy- Manuel raise his eyebrow questioningly. “Oh, we are not allowed in when the family is in there, unless they call us. Just follow the trail and you’ll be fine.” Guy-Manuel muttered a thank you before stepping into the garden, feeling a little overwhelmed. He suddenly felt like a pauper, Thomas had so many things that he had never even dreamt of having in his life and Thomas was so nonchalant about it all, as though it didn’t matter in the slightest bit. First the huge penthouse, then the private jet and now a private inn and garden in the country somewhere. No wander Thomas never understood why Guy-Manuel fretted when Thomas spent so much on him. Guy-Manuel had come from an average income family, they were comfortable but they could not afford wasting money on fancy cars and dinners either.

As he walked down the trail, he looked at the flowers all around him, a beautiful sight. There were medium tall trees behind the bushes of flowers lining the trail, dilapidated ancient brick buildings too, like those old Roman houses so old part of them crumbled, which let small beams of sunlight through, giving it an air of mystery. Given how old the main mansion was, that was not a surprise. This may have been a part of some rich aristocrat’s estate, a castle with gardens and mini chateaus around it. All in all, Guy-Manuel felt he was living some romantic fiction he had read in some trashy novel. He heard the sound of water running, true enough he reached a beautiful creek, water pouring down from a broken building before flowing on to create a mini fountain. There was a huge forest beyond, maybe the creek came from a river in there. He walked on until he found a small clearing, one with a huge marble gazebo in the middle. Thomas was sitting on a marble chair, at a round marble table, having a cup of tea.

 

Guy-Manuel walked up to the table and sat across Thomas, crossing his arms with a dissatisfied look on his face. Thomas just smiles radiantly at him. “Bonjour, darling. Why, you look like you’re unhappy about something.” Thomas rests his elbows on the table and placed his chin on his palm, looking at Guy-Manuel with a teasing look on his face. “So you own this place? Just how many surprises do you have up your sleeves that I have to learn from others?” Guy-Manuel asked with an irritated tone. Thomas sighs, closing his eyes. “I wanted to tell you today. There is a special reason why I brought you here, you know?” Guy-Manuel still had that annoyed look on his face, unhappy that Thomas always kept him in the dark. “You could have told me during the awfully long journey here that we are going to some place you own. Why don’t you tell me anything? I looked like a lost idiot in front of that lady earlier”, Guy-Manuel complained.

 

Thomas opened his eyes and took Guy-Manuel’s hand in his. “I wanted to show you this place, actually. This is my secret haven. I have brought none of my lovers here, I never deemed them special enough to share this place with them. I planned to confess my love to you over breakfast in this garden but I felt last night that I should tell you before we made love. So here we are, in the place I find most special in the world, the place that I only wanna share with you, my love. So you see, confessing my love and the significance of this place to me kind of went hand in hand, which is why I didn’t tell you earlier.” Now Guy-Manuel felt bad for trying to pick an argument with Thomas. “Sorry I burst out like that, I just…”Guy-Manuel attempted to apologize but Thomas shook his head, saying “I get why you’re pissed, really. Anyways, talking about last night, are you still hurting anywhere? You’re ok, right?”

 

Guy-Manuel blushed slightly at that, he just smiled shyly at Thomas to tell him that he was perfectly fine. “Whew! What a relieve! I’m not the gentlest of people went it comes to sex, I have lots of crazy kinks, I was so afraid that I was gonna hurt you. I was already so apprehensive that you have to endure pain and I’m so sorry about that. I never want to see you go through terrible pain, ever, if I can help it.” Guy-Manuel just smiled widely at that, happy beyond what words could describe. “Well, I’m not in pain, and I swear these sandwiches have been begging me to eat them since I came so, if you don’t mind, can you let go of my hand so that I can gobble them down?” Guy-Manuel was chipper, making Thomas laugh as he released his lover’s hand. They talked and exchanged playful jabs at each other as they eat the cheese and ham sandwiches, moving on to the apple strudel before having their tea.

 

When they were finished, they walked holding hands around the garden. “So this WAS a rich fellow’s garden in old times!” Guy-Manuel exclaimed excitedly when Thomas told him that it was an old garden from some family estate of some kind, built for the wife of the first owner. Thomas leads him to his favorite spot, near a large boulder by a wall covered in ivy. They sat there and just spent time together, talking nonsense about school days and annoying parents. Time flew by and eventually their stomachs growled and Thomas checked his watch, “Oh no wonder we’re hungry, it’s almost two!” before they practically raced each other back to the inn, laughing like little children. They reached the inn red faced and sweating from all that running around, making the workers smile seeing them so full of joy. Thomas told somebody to inform the kitchen to send lunch to their room.

The moment they were in their room, Thomas pushed Guy-Manuel against the door and kissed him, his tongue licking Guy-Manuel’s lips begging for entry. They kissed lazily and slowly, tasting each other before they broke off for air. “God, I am so thankful that you decided to intern at Hubgreen, I can’t imagine my life without you. Never leave me, Guy-Manuel, or I will surely die or become mad with grieve of losing you”, Thomas told his lover, his breath coming out in pants over his love’s face. Guy-Manuel immediately covered Thomas’ mouth with his hand, shaking his head furiously. “Don’t ever, EVER, talk about us being apart. Or you dying. I can’t take the notion of us being apart, I am afraid of it. So don’t ever mention it.”

 

Thomas locked his gaze with Guy-Manuel, so many things were being conveyed through their eyes alone, the depth of what they were feeling made words redundant in this moment. A knock on the door broke their dreamy gaze, their lunch had arrived. Thomas opened the door and a timid looking boy came in with a cart and placed their food on the table. Guy-Manuel went to the dresser to get the remote to turn on the air conditioning, he was feeling hot. It was in the middle of summer, the weather was sweltering and all the running he did earlier didn’t help either. He saw the note and rose and remembered that he hadn’t asked Thomas how the meeting with his dad went.

 

“Oh yeah, did the thing go well? Whatever it is that made you run off in the middle of the night”, Guy-Manuel asked, and Thomas told him that it went fine, it was just a small trouble of a shipment coming in late and it was settled. “Thanks for the note and the rose anyway, that was sweet of you.” Thomas froze in midstride, turning to look at Guy-Manuel abruptly. “Rose?” he asks, his tone sounding a little surprised even though he looked calm. “Yeah…”, Guy-Manuel frowned and picked up the rose and the note, “…you left it for me, saying that you were sorry and that you will be back an all.” Thomas’ gaze flicks to the rose, he was silent for a moment before saying, “Yeah, I figured you may be upset that I left you in the middle of our getaway, so what better way to placate an angry lover than the classic rose and apology note combo? Anyways, let’s eat before the food gets cold.”

 

Thomas was suddenly quiet during lunch, making Guy-Manuel wonder what was wrong. He asks Thomas why, his reply being an “I’m just famished so I’m really concentrating on eating first, that’s all.” They finished their lunch and Guy-Manuel noticed that Thomas was indeed wolfing down his food at a remarkable speed. ‘I guess he’s starving, is he even chewing his food?’ Guy-Manuel wondered silently. When they were done with lunch and the same timid boy from earlier had cleared the table, Guy-Manuel flopped onto the bed with full intention to sleep. He lets Thomas know as much. “You sleep so much, you will get lazy and you should not sleep immediately after you eat anyway”, Thomas scolded him gently.

 

Guy-Manuel buried his head into the pillow, adamant. “I didn’t sleep well last night, I kept on getting weird dreams that scared me. I even woke up scared at one point”, Guy-Manuel whined. Thomas fell into bed beside Guy-Manuel and cuddled him. “My poor, poor baby. Nightmares scaring my poor baby”, Thomas teases him. “Hey!” Guy-Manuel protested, “if you hadn’t left the windows open, I would not have to wake up and shut them. And those dreams were downright disturbing, it felt as though there were people here, talking and all. At one point I even thought I saw a woman sitting on the bed near me. Damm weird if you ask me.” Guy-Manuel felt Thomas freeze against him. “You’re complaining because you had to close the window?” Thomas asked him, his voice a little high pitched, sounding jittery all of a sudden. “Yeah, but is there anything wrong? Don’t get upset, I’m not really mad at you for leaving the windows open or anything”, Guy-Manuel said, feeling something was wrong.

 

Thomas just held him closer and began playing with his hair. “I’m not upset, don’t get worried now. Go to sleep my darling. I’m here to fend off any creatures that attack you in your dreams.” Guy-Manuel huffed at that, before closing his eyes and allowing himself to sleep, Thomas’ hand in his hair comforting him. Still, an unwelcomed thought settled in the back of his mind as he drifted off, that Thomas was hiding something from him, something big.

 

************

 

Thomas waited until he was absolutely sure that his lover was asleep before he pulled apart from him and sat at the edge of the bed. He hid his face in his hands, going into full panic mode. He had not left the window open. In fact he made sure it was locked before going off. Those dreams Guy-Manuel had. He was damm sure Guy-Manuel hadn’t been dreaming, there must have been somebody here, beside his love. How if they harmed him? Thomas felt his eyes water, no he could not take that. He sat there, regretting things he had done and wishing he could turn back time to undo the foolishness he had when he was so young, too young to fully understand what he was getting into.

 

He wasn’t kidding when he told Guy-Manuel that he had crazy fetishes, that he was afraid he might harm him. Thomas was a sadist at times, something dark lurks somewhere in his mind, what made him dominate and break his partners into submitting to him. In his youth, when he started university he had gone where he could let that darkness free, encouraged and urged it even. He used the fact that his parents had connections and he knew the right people to enter a dark, dark world, a world hidden away from normal people. A dark world where he was free to dominate over and somewhat torture those who wanted it, sometimes over the limit just because he could. Julian had been disgusted, not wanting to know any of the gory detail of what went on in that part of Thomas’ life. He was happy there, until the extremity of an incident shook him one day and he feared what he had become, deciding to leave. But those people who accepted him, nurtured him, made him the stable minded and dominant persona he was, were the same with him, they were mad, supremely mad. You just don’t walk away from shit like that and get to be normal again.

 

Of course she would have returned when he found somebody he loved. She was one of the few people who would know the significance of him bringing Guy-Manuel here, she knew him inside out. The red rose was her trademark, a ‘hello’ only Thomas would understand. Whoever she brought along with her, they didn’t want to harm Guy-Manuel. There was no need for that. Yet. They had left the rose for him, a sign that they were watching him. Of course they left it beside the note he left for Guy-Manuel. In that way Guy-Manuel would not suspect anything, thinking the rose was from him and they were also warning Thomas, a reminder of who he was and why he should not get the chance to be normal.

 

He looked at his angel who was sleeping soundly. He was so innocent, so good and kind at heart. How to tell him what he did? That he once sought pleasure in the pain of others, that he had a plethora of problems from his childhood that fucked with his mind? That he was, not what Guy-Manuel thought he was, instead was what he tried to portray to his lover in an attempt to gain his love. Only Julian knew him that well. And of course Liam but Liam only knew because he was Thomas’ bodyguard and driver. Liam’s opinion never mattered to him at all. Julian knew his fucked up mind, the real one and not the one he shows the world outside. That’s why Julian was so worried, he was afraid Thomas would break Guy-Manuel with his craziness. If Guy-Manuel ever knew about that world of his, it would break him. He would be disgusted with Thomas, he would feel so cheated, he would be so hurt that he would leave and never return. The thought itself shook Thomas to the core. He can’t lose Guy-Manuel, he loved him too much. He would do anything, sacrifice anything to have his love and affection, always.

 

Thomas got his mobile phone and dialed a number he hadn’t in a long time, but still knew by heart. “Ah, Thommy! To what do I owe this pleasure?” a woman’s voice rang out clearly, mocking him. “We need to talk.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 11: CONTROLLED AND OVERWHELMED**

Guy-Manuel was sulking, he was pissed off with Thomas, extremely so. Thomas had been smothering him again, scolding him and fussing at him for not eating. Guy-Manuel smacked Thomas across the face today, angry, before storming off to Thomas’ TV room and locking himself in before he started to cry, hot fat tears streaming like a river down his face as he wailed. The tension had been building up for days now. Thomas had to go on a business trip abroad to check up on some of Hubgreen’s offices and brief the team involved in some new project they had concerning green energy harvesting. The whole time he was away Thomas had been demanding to know every inch of Guy-Manuel’s life, from when he woke up to if he showered late to if he exercised. The most stressful of all, if he ate. Thomas had gone to the extent of asking, no forcing Guy-Manuel to send him snapshots of his meals just to ensure he was eating.

 

Guy-Manuel felt rebelliousness spur within him, feeling that Thomas being his boyfriend didn’t give him the right to attempt to ‘babysit’ him like that. Thomas was not his mother and he was not some errant ten year old who needed constant reminders on what he was to do and not to do. Frustrated, he had called his mother, rambling on to her about how he felt smothered and suffocated by Thomas’ controlling antics. His mother laughed, “But men are like that, honey, your dad does that all the time! Remember how he always pulled a face when I drank too much soda, saying I will get diabetes? Also, I wonder how many times you and Paul have told us that you were in your rooms, laughing your asses off hearing us argue over things that had no point whatsoever. Like that time we argued over if Gordon Ramsay should calm down a little. That’s just the way couples are! If you are mad, just tell him off. He’ll be mad for a while then he’ll cool off. Don’t tell me that you expected that you both will be all lovey dovey and not argue at all?”

 

He had taken his mother’s advice to heart, remembering every rom-com he had watched in his life and the ridiculous arguments the characters seem to have. After all, Thomas was only being that way because he cared, right? If he just wanted to screw him, they would be over by now. Over the three months they have been together Thomas had showered him with so much attention and care that he felt flattered, really. Thomas paid attention because he was sensitive, he had issues. Given the fact that nobody had ever succeeded in making Guy-Manuel kick his self-harming bulimia the gentle way, Thomas’ aggression was somewhat justified. But it was not only that. Thomas was slowly beginning to overwhelm him, his life centered on what Thomas told him, what Thomas wanted him to do. Thomas had begun to somewhat control his life whether he liked it or not, to make it simple.

 

Since the getaway, Guy-Manuel was noticing that more than ever. Actually, it was already apparent before the getaway, just that Guy-Manuel steadfastly ignored those signs of possessiveness. That day, after lunch Thomas had been extremely distracted, distant even and it made Guy-Manuel feel as though he had made Thomas upset. The next day they went on a trip to the farm. The trip started out fine, Guy-Manuel had been petting the horses and cows, feeding the ducks and generally playing with the animals, making Thomas laugh when he took selfies with some of the animals. He was petting a baby goat when a young woman with flaming red hair, who introduced herself as Jenna, came up to him and talked to him. She said he was good with handling the animals and that it was nice to see somebody showering affection on the animals. Seems fair enough a conversation, right? Apparently nope. Thomas’ demeanor had gotten hostile, he even dragged Guy-Manuel away by the arm after telling the woman that whether Guy-Manuel loved animals or not was none of her business and she should fuck off. Guy-Manuel was shocked, perplexed why Thomas did that to him. Thomas also screened through his list of friends and stated disdain for some of them, asking Guy-Manuel to stay away from them lest he be influenced by their ‘unsavory attitude.’

 

Pharrell had scoffed at that, “Common, he’s just afraid you’ll get into bad stuff, even I do that with my girlfriends. And he’s jealous! That woman must’ve been hitting on you, using the animals as an excuse to talk to you. He was just warding off competition!” Everywhere he went, the replies were the same. That he was over reacting and Thomas behavior was that off a common boyfriend. Many said that he was feeling like this because he wasn’t used to sharing his life with anyone else before, that now somebody had rights to know various stuff he did as they were in a relationship and he needed time to adjust to the idea. The thing was, Guy-Manuel felt that they were wrong. He always held back from telling people the worst. That was the spanking and the way Thomas psyched him. He remembered the morning after the first date, where they had been messing around Thomas had spanked him and told him that he disciplined his rebellious partners. It was so true. Thomas spanked him often, at times making him feel humiliated as the punishment made him feel like he was an errant child.

 

Then there was the part Guy-Manuel felt even more embarrassed to tell, the sex. Since that night where they made love, they had have sex a number of times, becoming a regular thing in their relationship. At times Thomas made him feel like a goddess, caressing him and pampering him and sometimes Thomas just made him feel like a slut. The lovemaking was passionate, they got lost in each other and savored each other’s body lovingly. But when Thomas wanted to fuck, it was rough, there was nothing sentimental about it at all. He would control Guy-Manuel and not permit him to move, telling him to stay still and let Thomas have his way. When he was like this, Thomas took total control and if Guy-Manuel tried to stop him, he was scolded and spanked. Thomas always kept on repeating the same things, “I know what I’m doing babe, relax and give in to me, let me take care of you, let me make you feel good.” It felt good but it also felt degrading at times, as though he was just a quick fuck.

 

Thomas was also being extremely possessive. They were at a club when a girl had flirted with him. She touched his arm lightly when suddenly Thomas came out of nowhere and hugged him from behind, before telling the girl that he was taken and that she should leave if she knew what was good for her. Later, when they were in the car back to Thomas’ penthouse, Thomas justified, “Always remember that you have a boyfriend, Guy-Manuel. You are mine and mine only. I get jealous when people touch what’s mine with intention. Why must you let her flirt with you when you already belong to another? Don’t ever test me, darling, I have every intention of fighting off anybody who tries to steal you away from me.”

 

This evening, Liam had come to pick him up from work, Thomas demanding that he wanted to see him after the week apart. Since the getaway Guy-Manuel practically lived at Thomas’ anyway. They were having dinner when Guy-Manuel said that he had enough and didn’t want to eat anymore. Thomas sighed, before bringing up the fact that he had let Guy-Manuel slide with not giving him the snapshots of his meals. Guy-Manuel went silent at that, the actual reason he did that was because he didn’t want to obey Thomas’ orders because he didn’t like Thomas ordering him around anyway. “You disobeyed me, I knew you were not eating. What did you have for lunch anyway? Since you have barely eaten, tell me. What has your stomach so full?” When Guy-Manuel remained silent still, Thomas finally told him that he knew Guy-Manuel only ate an apple and some toast for lunch and knew this because he had paid somebody in the cafeteria tell him what Guy-Manuel ate every day. Thomas knew that when he was not in the basement with Thomas, Guy-Manuel enjoyed chatting with his colleagues over lunch at the cafeteria.

 

Guy-Manuel’s temper flared and he felt violated, Thomas was spying on him! Guy-Manuel argued that Thomas shouldn’t be spying on him like that. Thomas told him that he didn’t trust him to eat and Guy-Manuel was not eating properly anyway, proving that Thomas had solid grounds to do so. Guy-Manuel told him that he was trying, he was trying so hard, why can’t Thomas understand that? “I’m trying every day, Thomas, in fact I am eating regular meals every day! Three months ago, I used to only nibble on bread and cheese when I felt like fainting…can’t you see that I’m already doing the best I can?”

 

Thomas crossed his arms, stubborn. “You’re making excuses. I think you’re not trying hard enough. Well, I think you’re not trying at all!” Guy-Manuel lost his head at that. “And just who the fuck do you think so you are to talk to me like that?” he yelled, making his disagreement known. Thomas narrowed his eyes at him. “Don’t challenge me, Guy-Manuel. I talk to you like that because that’s the only way anything gets into your head anyway.” Guy-Manuel was beyond angry by this point, hurt. “Well, you don’t know what it’s like! Struggling with something you’ve had since you were fourteen and haunt you every time you look at your waist. You have no right to stand there and judge whether I’m trying hard enough just because I’m your boyfriend. Hell, how the fuck do you even know whether I am genuinely trying? You just stand there and blurt out whatever you want, not caring whether it hurts at all, you pompous ass who thinks that you’re always right!”

 

Thomas lunged forward, grabbing his wrists. “I told you, Guy-Manuel, don’t challenge me. You can do better, you just don’t want to and now you’re being childish and making all sorts of arguments to justify your stupidity, still wanting to do what you want rather than what’s good for you. In fact, I’m convinced a good spanking is what you need to teach you a lesson to not argue back.” Guy-Manuel yanked his wrist away, yelling “No! I won’t let you spank me anymore! I am not in some kindergarten where you spank little kids when they misbehave! Don’t you dare touch me!” Thomas looked extremely furious. “Be a good boy and receive your punishment dutifully, or…”, Thomas trailed off, a warning that only served to make Guy-Manuel more angry. “Why, what are you gonna do?” he challenges. “Cane me? Go fuck yourself, Bangalter, I’m not taking your punishments anymore.” Guy-Manuel’s veins were pumping with adrenaline at this point, anger fueling his cussed filled comebacks. He rarely cussed, a polite person in general but now he was just plain angry.

Thomas suddenly tackled him, trying to force him to lie over his lap to receive his spanking anyway.

 

Guy-Manuel didn’t know how, he just knew that he had somehow escaped Thomas’ iron grip and slapped him, hard. There was a moment where they just stared at each other before Guy-Manuel just whispered, being distressed and crushed as he was, “You fucking jerk, Thomas. How could you? How could you try to hit me like that?” before running to the nearest room that he could lock himself in, which was the TV room. He just needed to get away from Thomas right now. Once inside, he started crying and wailing loudly, he started breaking expensive glassware to vent out his anger, sadness racking his soul at this point. He just wanted to cry and scream his anguish at his situation out. He was beyond hurt now, he had been feeling suffocated by Thomas’ controlling his life and now Thomas had just hurt him by undermining just how hard he tried, fought with his insecurities to stop being bulimic. He felt like Thomas just slashed his heart, and it was bleeding out profusely.

 

He heard Carla rain knocks on the door, “Guy, open the door, please!”, but he didn’t bother because he knew that Thomas was at the other end and he couldn’t face him right now. Eventually, he hears Thomas’ desperate voice, “Darling I’m so sorry! Open this door please, I can hear you crying” but still he couldn’t find it in himself to bother. Resigned, he switched off the lights and hugged a small pillow as he settles on the sofa, trying to sleep off his sorrow.

 

****************

 

Thomas was lost in memories as he heard his love crying away. He hated himself right now, hated the way he had to control everything to make himself feel secure.

Some time back, when they were still on their vacation, their getaway, Thomas Bangalter was sneaking out of his room, his lover was asleep in bed, tired after a whole day of walking around the farm, giving him the perfect opportunity to settle this…thing with her. The red queen of pain, Athalia, as she was known in the dark world he once dwelled in. Yesterday he had called her, knowing that she would be expecting it after the stunt she pulled. “Oh, we definitely need to talk. You’re breaking a really important rule you know, we will step in if you don’t stop.” Thomas definitely didn’t like being told what he could not do. “Stay away from him. If you ever come near him again, you will have hell to pay”, he warned, making her laugh. “We’ll see”, she said before cutting the line.

 

To his horror, there she was, talking to Guy-Manuel the next afternoon about animals when he had told her to stay away. Panicking and afraid he reacted offensively, making Guy-Manuel perplexed. His love didn’t understand, all he saw was that Thomas was being a jerk by being rude to somebody having a perfectly normal talk with him. “Why, because I can’t talk to anybody even though they are just trying to be friendly? It’s an inn, Thomas, for god’s sake, people come here to visit and sometimes people talk!” he snapped when Thomas told him not to talk to strangers.

 

He was all set to come face to face with that character, the ruthless creature Athalia was but what he met fazed him more. She didn’t come as her dominatrix alter ego, she was here as herself, her common, everyday self. She was here as Jenna Wilson. “Ah, I guessed that talking to your boy would make you shaken enough to some see me. I will have this talk to you, Bangalter, face to face and not over some phone. You need somebody to remind you of who you really are. You seem to forget”, she told him in a serious tone. Thomas felt his stomach back flip. She was not using any of her playful retort, she was not even trying to be Athalia. She was here because she was reminding him of what he wanted to forget, the monster that dwelled in his mind.

 

“I have not forgotten. It haunts me every day, what I needed to satisfy my...my inner monster. That’s none of your business. I love Guy-Manuel and I will be with him as Thomas, not Roule. That part of me is gone and never coming back. I met the one I was meant to be with, Jenna, I can’t let you tell him about what I was, about that monster in me, ever”, Thomas dropped his defensive demeanor, hoping that he could make her understand, make her drop what she had come here for and go away. She crossed her arms over her chest, a snarl on her lips as she bit back, “Really? Roule is just a name you use to separate our fantasies from reality, an alter ego. But the fact that you are a dominant master will always be there, it’s in the way you behave. You can never be anything else, WE can never be anything else and that’s why we go where we are. We create our own world, seeking those who are by nature submissive and wanting to be dominated and be our slaves. That’s why we remain within our community and never inflict ourselves out on others. You are one selfish ass to be doing this to him, you know.”

 

Thomas felt his throat constrict, she spoke the truth, what he didn’t want to hear at all. He shook his head in denial. “I love him. I don’t see him in that way at all. I will never make him what….what they were to me. Never.” Even Thomas could hear the blatant lie in his words, what he told himself every day to convince himself that his being with Guy-Manuel was justified. Her eyes grew wide in anger. “Oh, come on, you idiot!” she spat. “You were, ARE, one of the most ruthless masters I’ve ever seen. You control your submissives, force them to bend to your will like nobody I’ve seen. You control everything and anything about them to the point they can’t even think for themselves. And I need not remind you how ruthless you were in your punishment when they disobeyed or even showed a lick of rebelliousness, you are known as the absolute, most unforgiving dominant ever. That’s why you ventured out of the common BDSM community, you came to us because we had one rule. Once you are a submissive you can’t rebel or get out until the term is served. Or that the punishments were absolutely more severe and absolute. We make normal people practicing S/M look tame.”

 

Thomas looked away, he knew what she said was correct, that he was the pure sadist and he will never be able to completely change that about him. Jenna, seeing that Thomas was ignoring her grew desperate. “You aren’t being fair to him!” she shouted. “The people who come to our world know what they are getting into! They know the limits are extremely blurred and they know that once they agree they can never say no until the agreement is served, unlike the norm with other communities. We are hardcore people and we are in the underground because what we do may be deemed torture by normal people. In fact, we have connections to drug cartels and stuff, we run illegally but you got in because you had the connections to do so. We never, ever pursue romantic relationships with normal people because we can NEVER be satisfied with just having a normal partner and we are screwed up. You are not being fair to him at all, lying to him about who you are. How long will it be before he notices? Before you try to break him then control him?”

 

Thomas turns around and tries to walk away. He is pulled back by a very angry Jenna, her red hair flying at her drastic movement. “Just who do you think so you are? I won’t let you do this. You can’t unleash that shit on some poor, innocent lover. I’ve been watching, he’s a simple, innocent and very introverted person. He looks like an angel when he sleeps. I understand why you love him so, I do. But tell me, I’m sure you have imagined chaining him up, flogging him and training him to be submissive and compliant to your every will. Is it fair to do that to the one you love? You will hurt his feelings, Thomas, you will. One day you will break and you will try to forcefully bend him to your will. Then what will you do? Let him go? Really? I won’t let you do this, there are people willing to be dominated and tortured to near death so why don’t just stick to them? Don’t inflict this on him, please,” she pleads, all traces of her alter ego gone. Thomas pulls his hand free, a stubborn look on his face. “I have not dreamt of torturing him for pleasure as I did my slaves. I doubt I ever will. Don’t ruin my chance to be normal, please. I love him so much that I can do anything for him, even change who I am.”

 

Jenna just gave him a sad look. “Whatever you may think. The day he runs out will be the day you remember what I’ve told you. I just hope he runs before you get to business cause you’re real nasty when you want control and you don’t compromise not having absolute control.” Thomas told himself repeatedly that Jenna was just jealous, jealous that he could try and change but she could not, would not give up what she had in that world. He told himself that he would never hurt his love in any way, that he loved him far too much to do that.

 

Now, as he sat hunched near the TV room door where Guy-Manuel had locked himself in, he realized that Jenna was right. Thomas was hurting Guy-Manuel just by being himself. He didn’t even realize what he had done until Guy-Manuel looked at him with that look, that hurt look when Thomas had try and punish him after Guy-Manuel said he didn’t want to be spanked. Thomas had been trying to bend him to his will all along, even though he kept it to only spanking him and using biting words and when Guy-Manuel rebelled, he used a plethora of excuses, including the bulimia.

 

Thomas took a deep breath. Recently he has started to dream, dreams of a completely submissive Guy-Manuel who followed what he wanted. He dreamt more as Guy-Manuel resisted, his stubbornness fueling Thomas’ controlling nature. When he was in bed with Guy-Manuel he lost control at times, trying to get his lover to let Thomas do whatever he wanted to him. God, how he wished he dreamt about using all his toys on Guy-Manuel at times. They were in the house, locked away in a room that looked like a dungeon, made specifically for when he found his perfect submissive. But Guy-Manuel was not that, he was his love, his life, his boyfriend. There was a clear difference between the two.

 

He looked at his watch. It was very late at night, Carla was still awake and worried, pacing around the house and he himself was worried about Guy-Manuel. Carla had run after Guy-Manuel immediately when he took off as Thomas just stood there, surprised of what he had tried to do. She came back, panicked, “Sir, he’s locked himself in and he’s wailing loudly. I think he’s even wreaking the decorations, Sir, do something, please!” He had the spare key and he sat in front the door for what seemed hours, remembering and regretting things. When he was sure Guy-Manuel was asleep, he opened the door and walked in to find his love sleeping, curled into a ball on the sofa. Thomas carried him gently, not wanting to wake him and brought him to the room and tucked him in. Moving his hair off his face, Thomas looked at his love, really looked at him. His face was streaked with dried tear tracks, his face was really pale save his red eyes and he looked a mess. Thomas was crushed to think that he was responsible for that.

 

Thomas left Guy-Manuel to sleep and went off, telling Carla not to worry and to make sure Guy-Manuel ate breakfast. He drove around the city, no real place to go but not wanting to be home either. He just drifted around, as his mind was throwing memories around, making him filled with shame and regret.

 

************

 

Liam was driving a very sullen and quiet Guy-Manuel to work the next day. Guy-Manuel had woke up to the loud alarm clock, surprised to find himself in Thomas’ bed and the blankets tucked neatly around him, keeping him warm and cozy. He showered and dressed before sauntering around the house, looking for Thomas. He hated that he was like that, he was actually mad at Thomas and yet he could never really stay mad at him, stay away from him for long. Carla told him that Thomas had left in the middle of the night before serving him breakfast. Guy-Manuel was feeling down and he was contemplating things deeply. He remembered Valarie warning him about Thomas. He always wanted to ask her what she knew, but was too afraid. Today he was determined to ask. He had that feeling that Thomas was hiding something for far too long already, and he had to know.

 

The first thing he did when he reached the office was pull Valarie to a corner and ask her. “Please Valarie, what is it you heard about Thomas? I have to know, he’s been getting really weird lately.” Valarie looked conflicted. “Look, what I hear was rumors. I don’t know if they were true, just that it warrants caution.” She feared that she may be wrong, telling Guy-Manuel something like that would be spreading gossip, which she hated to do. “I promise I would never tell anybody what you tell me, please”, he pleaded with her. Valarie was about to tell him something when she gasped, looking over Guy-Manuel’s shoulder in surprise. Guy-Manuel turned to see a young man standing there. “I’m the person who told her what she knew. I’ll tell you myself what I know about Bangalter junior”, the young man said.

 

“I’m guessing by weird you mean he’s been trying to control and discipline you lately. What has he been trying to do? Lock you and torture you?” the young man asked. Guy-Manuel just looked at him stupidly, kind of surprised the fellow was even there. “I know what you need to know, I’ve been meaning to tell you for some time. You’re Thomas’ boyfriend, right?” Guy-Manuel is far too surprised to answer, nobody here knew that for sure. The young man continues, “I’ve been watching you guys meet in secret. The way you guys are, I’m sure you don’t know this one particular habit or thing about him.” Guy-Manuel felt anticipation rack him all over. He had been so sure that Thomas was hiding something, he was right and he was dying to know what it is.

 

“What is it?” he asked, curiosity bursting through. “I need to show you. Meet me after work and I will bring you somewhere, introduce you to somebody. I take it you don’t know who Sir Roule is?” Guy-Manuel shakes his head at that, he had never heard of that person. “Well, it’s time you met him.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 12: ROSSETTE**

“For fuck’s sake, Liam, I don’t care if I get a speeding ticket, just go faster!” Thomas was sitting at the back of his Jaguar, shouting. Liam looked as panicked as Thomas was feeling, but that was mostly due to Thomas’ shouting from the back seat. Thomas went back to fidgeting. The whole day today, Guy-Manuel had been cold, but Thomas thought it was due to the argument they had. Thomas messaged his mobile at morning tea. ‘Wanna meet up for lunch? I will get something real nice for you, chocolate cake maybe?’ Guy-Manuel had not reply, so Thomas resigned himself to waiting until lunch hour came, giving Guy-Manuel some space to cool off.

 

During lunch when he called his love, an angry “Yes, what do you want, Thomas?” was the first thing that came through the line. “Hmm, are you free? I’m missing you so much, I thought of having lunch with you at our usual spot, you know? Just the two of us”, he said carefully as Guy-Manuel sounded really angry. ‘Wow, his anger really is something’, Thomas mused. To his surprise, Guy-Manuel gave a shrill laugh that raised the hairs on the back of Thomas’ neck. “Why? Wanna apologize? Oh, look here darling, since I made you mad I need to shower you with stuff, I got a very expensive chocolate cake for you, hope this BUYS your forgiveness. In the end money buys everything, now does it?” Guy-Manuel snapped. “Wow, you’re really angry now, are you?” Thomas said in a low tone, a lump forming in his throat at Guy-Manuel’s hostility.

 

“Of course I am, I always let you slide, always let you order me around, well no more! Maybe you think that you can buy my heart and soul with all the romantic things money can buy, but sorry mister, you can’t. And oh yeah, FYI, my world does not revolve solely around you. I have colleagues I would like to have lunch with also, we kind of live together anyway so you can always just see me later. Bye”, Guy-Manuel said with finality. “No, don’t put down the phone, PLEASE!” Thomas shouted, and to his relieve, he still could hear Guy-Manuel’s breathing at the other end of the line. “Look, I know you’re angry, you have every right to be. I did wrong by you. I’m not trying to buy you with anything. I know you’re not that cheap. Please, forgive me, darling.” Thomas heard Guy-Manuel snort at his begging.

 

“I love you so much. It hurts me so much when we are fighting like this. I would do anything, please tell me what do I have to do for you to believe me?” Thomas begged his lover, desperate to placate him. What Guy-Manuel asked shook Thomas so much, he was drenched in cold sweat. “You are hiding something from me. And it has to do with why you are so mean at times. If you want my forgiveness, tell me. Tell me what is it you are hiding.” Guy-Manuel was whispering now, his voice shaking. Thomas flew right into full panic mode.  “Wha-what? I-I am hi-hiding nothing”, Thomas stuttered, “why d-do you ev-even thi-think..” Thomas was cut off when Guy-Manuel screamed “ENOUGH!”, nearly turning Thomas deaf. “You liar! I know you are hiding something. You want to apologize, want to be in my good books but you can’t even be honest with me. Go to hell, Thomas”, Guy-Manuel yelled, fed up, before cutting off the line.

 

Thomas sat at his desk, scared. How long will he be able to hide that one secret from his love? Hopefully forever. He sighed, his heart heavy. He couldn’t lose Guy-Manuel, not ever. He would rather die than for that to happen. Thomas hoped that Guy-Manuel was saying all those things because he only suspected something was amiss, and not because he knew or was close to finding out about Roule. It was a very far-fetched thing to guess about a person, right? Thomas looked at the stack of paperwork he had yet to review. He felt like ditching his work and going down to Guy-Manuel, to hug him and tell him how much he dreaded losing him. How much he needed him. But he can’t, the paperwork was important and he really needed to sort them out first. Thomas rushed through his work, finishing it as quick as possible so that he could make it in time before Guy-Manuel got off work. At this point he didn’t care if his father found out and scolded him for fraternizing with an intern, he had to go make this right before he lost Guy-Manuel.

 

To his absolute disappointment, when he went down to the engineering department, Guy-Manuel had already gone off. He sauntered in casually and made small talk before asking where the intern is. The head of department had told him that Guy-Manuel had left with another worker from PR, Andrew Fulmill. Thomas’ heart nearly stopped, he knew that name. Andrew was his submissive a long time ago. Coincidentally, Andrew was hired here. Thomas saw him around the building, but ignored him. There was only one reason why Andrew would approach Guy-Manuel. To tell him the truth. Suddenly their conversation earlier made sense. Guy-Manuel had given him one last chance to come clean before he found out himself. He had thrown away that golden chance in his stupid attempt to keep Guy-Manuel in the dark.

 

He immediately got Liam, all sense of composure gone and desperate, telling him to drive as fast as possible. He needed to reach to that place. Quickly. Even though Liam was already driving quite fast, Thomas still felt like they were crawling. He fidgeted and moved around nervously, every second that went by was absolute torture, was killing him. All he wanted to do was to get there and explain to Guy-Manuel before he found out, got revolted and ended their relationship. By god, he owed Guy-Manuel a very, very long explanation.

 

*************

 

Guy-Manuel entered the bar with mixed feelings. He was curious, scared and nervous, whatever he found out here will change the course of his relationship with Thomas forever. Andrew moved to the bar and ordered drinks for them both. Whiskey on the rocks. When the shots of whiskey came, Guy-Manuel just stared down at his hesitantly. “Take the shot. You’ll need it. I’ll explain a little before you go in, all right? Just so that you understand what it is you are seeing”, Andrew told him as he looked at Guy-Manuel, feeling pity for the boy. Guy-Manuel took a deep breath before downing the whiskey in one go. “Ok, tell me. Who is this Roule fellow and what does he have to do with Thomas?” Guy-Manuel asked. Andrew led Guy-Manuel to a table in the corner where they wouldn’t be overheard and they both sat down, both of them nervous.

 

“Ok, have you heard of the practice of S/M?” Andrew asked and Guy-Manuel nodded. “Good. What do you know about it?” Andrew asked him. Guy-Manuel blushed, suddenly feeling stupid and sheltered. “Well, not much…just what I read from Story of O and all. I just know that there is a sadistic master and that person has slaves. The slaves are trained to behave in a way pleasing to the master and do whatever the master requires of them. Mostly kinky sex stuff. The slaves are punished if they retaliate…” Guy-Manuel trailed off as he began to realize something. Thomas always talked about obeying and disciplining and punishments. Suddenly, the pieces of the puzzle began falling together.

 

Andrew nodded, relieved that at least Guy-Manuel knew the basics. By the way Guy-Manuel was gawping, he guessed that Guy-Manuel had realized that Thomas’ behavior was that of a master, a dominant. “Are you saying…”, Guy-Manuel began but couldn’t bring himself to finish the question. “Ok, let’s go in. Just relax and be cool, all right? If anybody, anybody at all asks you to ‘play’, just politely refuse. Don’t talk to anybody and don’t look friendly. Got it?” Andrew asked him as he stood up. Guy-Manuel swallowed before nodding and standing up too.  Andrew went to the bartender and whispered something, before they were led to a door at the back of the bar. “Here we go.” The person who led them there opened the door and Andrew stepped in.

 

Guy-Manuel squinted, his eyes adjusting to the dim lighting. The door was closed behind him and sounded like it was locked again. “Welcome to the Rossette. A community for hardcore S/M people. This is where we come to play”, Andrew told him as he waved his arm around, welcoming Guy-Manuel to the fantasy world it was. Guy-Manuel looked around. The whole place looked like something from a porn movie. The lighting was dim, the walls black and red and there were posh, vintage wooden tables with chairs around it along with purple and red sofas. The smell of leather and smoke filled the air. The people dressed like fictional movie characters, some were even moving around naked. Guy-Manuel felt out of element immediately.

 

There were people with collars around their necks. Some of the collars had chains, and the ones wearing them were led by another, long silver chains glinting in the dark. A blonde lady was leading three people, two men and a woman. Guy-Manuel just gawked at them, they looked like dogs on a leash to him. Seeing Guy-Manuel lost, Andrew explained, “Those are the submissive, or slaves. They are the absolute properties of their masters and wear the collar as a testament to that. They must wear the collar all the time, even out of here.” “But that make them seem like real slaves. And outside of the community? Like always a slave?” Guy-Manuel asked. Andrew nodded slowly. “Once the term is signed, you are a submissive, full time. What you can and cannot do will be determined by your master. You have no freedom of your own, no will of your own. Your master will skim through your lifestyle and change it to their liking, control what you eat, when you go out, who you are allowed to talk to and generally, dictate your whole life.” Some of the submissive had blindfolds around their eyes. “They masters can even determine if their submissive are allowed to look at certain things. They are not permitted to see until their masters remove their blindfolds.”

 

Guy-Manuel was shocked. The extent of the master’s control was extreme, far too extreme for him. “Come”, Andrew led him to another part of the place. There were people surrounding what seemed like a show. “This is the exhibition. There are many rooms where free masochists and the masters can play. But masters can order their submissive to go on exhibition for all to see, an absolute gesture of ownership.” Guy-Manuel tip toed to see a woman whipping a man who was strapped down to a bench. The whip cracked through the air, making a sound that made Guy-Manuel wince. The man being whipped moaned in pain. His skin had already started to bleed in some places. Suddenly, Guy-Manuel recognized the dominant. The woman who had talk to him at the farm, effectively driving Thomas nuts. “Jenna.” “Oh, so you know her outside of here. In here, she is Athalia, the red queen of pain. One of the masters. She has five slaves right now, I think”, Andrew said as he looked at Athalia whipping her slave like it was the most normal thing in the world.

 

“More than one slave? So a submissive can only be attached to a master but one master can have multiple slaves?” Guy-Manuel asked, to which Andrew nodded. That didn’t seem fair to Guy-Manuel but seeing the slaved stripped of all basic rights, he guessed that since the master did whatever he wanted, it didn’t really matter. They passed several rooms, which Guy-Manuel guessed were the rooms people ‘played’ in. They entered another place that looked like an old shop. “Look around”, Andrew told him. Guy-Manuel walked around, seeing various canes, whips, ropes, strange looking benches and other things he did not know. They all looked like they inflicted a lot of pain. At the end of the line, he saw a cage. Big enough to fit a human in it but the person would not be able to move at all. “This is the equipment chamber. Stuff all can share is here. You can use them to play and then return them. But stuff like nipple clamps, genital clamps, chastity belts and dildos, the personal stuff you have to bring yourself. We keep a high standard of hygiene here, so no sharing of stuff like that.” Guy-Manuel pointed at the cage, to which Andrew said, “For punishment. A master can lock submissive in there to discipline them.” Guy-Manuel walked away, wanting to get away from the stuff in the room. He stumbled into the next chamber in a daze. How could people live this kind of lives? For sex play he could understand, but such control over other, supposedly free people? It all felt so wrong to him. Upon entering the room, Guy-Manuel was shocked to see a more horrible sight.

 

A woman was strung up by her wrist and her feet kept in place with sandals bolted to the floor. She either had to tip toe to keep the strain of the string of her wrists or let the rope cut into her flesh. Guy-Manuel heard a clinking sound. “Oh god”, Guy-Manuel nearly fainted. At the corner of the room, there was a girl barely wearing anything. The little clothing she did wear was made of leather. The woman was shackled and chained to the wall, a ball and gag in her mouth that controlled her breathing so that she could hardly breathe. She was crying, most probably she was in pain due to all the welts, cuts and burns on her skin. Still, she looked adoringly towards a man standing near her, who was holding a menacing looking leather brown flogger.  The man near her, most probably her master, turned to look at Guy-Manuel’s gasp.

 

 He walked towards Guy-Manuel, a smile on his lips. The man was dashingly handsome and was dressed in a crisp white dress shirt and black slacks. Definitely a master. The man held Guy-Manuel’s hand before bringing it to his lips, kissing it gently. “Hmm, I’ve never seen you here before. And I see no collar too. Am I seeing an unclaimed submissive, I hope? I would love to string you up and play with you, oh beautiful creature.” Guy-Manuel immediately pulled his hand away as Andrew came in. “Ah, Sir Stephan, I am so sorry, Sir”, Andrew said, kneeling down. Sir Stephan petted his head. “Since you are unbounded to a master right now, Andy, can I guess that this is your slave? Or is he a friend you brought?” Stephan eyed Guy-Manuel up and down with a look that scared Guy-Manuel like hell. “An unbound submissive can’t be moving about on his free will, stumbling around into a master’s chamber. Clearly you didn’t even know this is my private chamber, I left the door open so that people could look in anyway.” Stephan cupped Guy-Manuel’s cheek gently, caressing. “If you were mine, I would lock you away. No master is crazy enough to let a slave so dainty move around”, he whispered before moving forward to kiss Guy-Manuel’s forehead. Guy-Manuel felt revolted but he was too stunned to say anything.

 

Sir Stephan brushed his hand through Guy-Manuel’s hair. “Oh, such lovely hair. I wonder how long the angels in heaven took to create such a lovely being. Interested to play with me? I promise I won’t make you bleed, I don’t want to scar such beautiful skin. I’ll just make it all red with welts and leather burns, all over from the paddles and canes I have”, Stephan said as he brushed his thumb over Guy-Manuel’s lips, making him shiver in fear. Guy-Manuel was really not interested in being subjected to any form of pain for anybody’s amusement.  “No, thanks I’m afraid. I don’t want to play.” Stephan pulled his hand back, laughing. “A pity. I would love to claim you and train you to be my obedient pet. I can imagine you screaming for me already.” Guy-Manuel felt bile rise to his throat. “I am claimed. Just I am not a submissive like a slave. I am a dominant’s lover,” Guy-Manuel said quickly, wanting Stephan to stop coming on to him.

 

Stephan laughed haughtily at that. “Seriously, one of the couples that just wanna play? That’s so boring but I guess not everybody can stomach being a true masochist. Me, I crave a completely pliant lover, the one who finds such delight in pain and being dominated, one who follows my every will without question. But alas, that is not possible as a lover must be allowed to be free around you, you love them as they are, lively beings. I’m compelled to train my partners into being compliant of my every will and I don’t accept them doing anything unnecessary on their own” Stephan moves back to the woman strung up, touching her arm gently. “Your lover brought you here for you here so that you guys can have extreme play without fear of being caught, I guess. Boy, am I jealous of that girl who has you. Mind you, maybe she’s interested to share? I am one of the house masters, so I can compel her into sharing but I doubt she would like it” Stephan drawled on as he checked the ropes, making sure they were still tightly strung.

 

A light pitter patter of footsteps could be heard, somebody was running towards them. Athalia stepped in, red hair tied up in a fishtail braid that swung around as she moved. “God, Andrew! How dare you do this! You will be severely punished for this. Did you forget that the house masters have absolute power here so we can give out punishments to people who disobey a direct order? I told you not to bring him here”, Athalia snarled. Guy-Manuel suddenly felt angry. Andrew had only been trying to help him find the truth. “Why? So that I will be kept in the dark? So that Thomas can continue abusing my feelings as though I am some slave that has to be at his beck and call?” Athalia looked at him, she was so different here than she was when Guy-Manuel saw her in the farm. Here, she had an air of an unforgiving ice cold bitch. Somewhere behind him he hears a surprised “Thomas?” coming from Stephan. Athalia just gave him a sideway glace, told Andrew that she’ll deal with him later before turning to face Guy-Manuel completely.

 

“Thomas will never abuse you or make you his slave, he loves you! He loves you so much that he is willing to die for you. He asked me to let him try and change, to not tell you about all of this. You are revolted are you not? Most people who don’t share the same tendencies feel that way and that’s why we are here, hidden away in secret”, Athalia said very slowly, she could see that Guy-Manuel was extremely angry and she didn’t want to aggravate him any further. Stephan looked lost, confused and surprised all at once. “You don’t get to fucking decide!” Guy-Manuel shouted suddenly and began pacing around the room.

 

“I am his boyfriend, I have the right to know. He may not abuse me by inflicting physical pain on me but he hurts my feelings all the time. It comes naturally to him to do this kind of stuff, I get it now. I made myself vulnerable the day I fell in love with him.” Guy-Manuel stopped pacing, he felt sad, so sad. He looked down at the floor, whispering “You may control a person using pain. They follow everything you say because they like it. They agreed to it. But love?” Guy-Manuel looked up at Athalia. “Love controls a person in a far worse manner than pain ever can. And I never agreed to all of this. I just fell in love and that gave Thomas the power to hurt and control me like nobody ever did. Manipulate me into being what he wanted. Is that fair? Is it fair to keep me in the dark so that my love blindly keeps me a slave to Thomas?”

 

Stephan looked at Athalia with a surprised stare. “Is he talking about Roule, Athalia? There’s only one Thomas here as far as I can remember.” Athalia nods and Stephan loses his flirtatious air immediately. “God! That sadist really thought he could change?” he asked in disbelieve. “Roule fell in love. He fell so hard in love that he willed himself to try and change for his lover. He actually thought he can change his very basic instincts of domination for Guy-Manuel.” Stephan snorted. “He is the most absolute and brutal of all house masters. He is incapable of changing that part about himself. He shouldn’t have done this. He hurt this boy’s feelings here, lied to him about who he was. I take it that he’s coming here? After all, you seem to know what has happened and came rushing so he must have sought your help, I guess?” Athalia ran a hand through her braid, sighing. “He’s coming because he knows that Andrew brought Guy-Manuel here. He’s coming to deal with his submissive. As tradition, Stephan, we have to bring the submissive to his master’s chamber to await his master.”

 

Stephan raised his hands into the air. “I’m not doing that. He’s not a sub bound by our terms, so I don’t wanna be the evil guy here. You do it.” Athalia held Guy-Manuel’s arm gently. “Come, I will bring you to your master’s chamber. You are to wait there until your master comes and decide what he shall do to you. If you try to run, as a master in this community there are certain punishments I can give out to warn you about insubordination. Do you understand?” Athalia said gently, reluctantly even. Guy-Manuel just nodded. He was in a haze of emotions, he just followed pliantly where Athalia led him. He was brought to a room with avocado green walls and a huge brown sofa at the corner. Athalia led him to the corner with the shackles and attempted to shackle his legs, but stopped when Guy-Manuel looked at her with a pleading look. She stroked his cheek gently. “I am so sorry, you truly are a sweetheart. I hope you can forgive Thomas, he only kept you in the dark because he feared losing you so much”, she told him before she left.

 

Guy-Manuel just sat there and waited, waited for what seemed like hours. He was really crushed. Thomas had hidden such a big thing, something that affected their relationship so much from him. His Thomas was a sadist who liked inflicting pain onto his partners for fun. What’s more, he enjoyed having them as slaves, at his total control and mercy. He had been trying to control Guy-Manuel all along. How couldn’t he see it? Why did he let Thomas het away with treating him like that? He was so lost in thought he almost didn’t hear the door open and the footsteps entering. Almost.

 

**************

 

When Thomas finally arrived at Rossette, he ran all the way through the place towards his chamber. He was too late, Jenna told him that Andrew had showed Guy-Manuel everything. And now Guy-Manuel was being treated like a slave, forced to wait for his master to come deal with him. Not a good way to be dealing with this. Stephan stopped him on the way. “Just wanted to let you know, the boy is very hurt. Way to go, you managed to hurt another person in a way any of us couldn’t. You bastard.” Thomas couldn’t say anything to that. He was the bastard here. When he reached the door to his chamber, he was shaking all over. He was scared to face Guy-Manuel on the other side. ‘Man up, Thomas. You sought trouble so go clean up’, he thought as he opened the door.

 

Inside, he spotted Guy-Manuel huddled at a corner. Thomas went up to him and sat in front of him. Guy-Manuel’s body was racked with sobs. “Love? Please look at me. I can explain, please, just please listen to me”, Thomas said. Guy-Manuel looked up, his eyes were a blue fire. “What explanation? I already saw all that there is to see. You like breaking people and controlling them. Completely, like the human slaves Abraham Lincoln abolished. Was it because I was so uncomfortable and quiet at the club? The introverted and scared person I was? Because I got to hand it to you, you really managed to humiliate and control my mind at times. I must’ve known at first sight that I am such an insecure person, that you’d be able to break me easily. I was such a fool to believe that somebody like you would ever truly fall for somebody like me. Oh god, I gave you everything, even my virginity. I’m so stupid.”

 

Thomas couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What? No, no, darling, I love you. I would never hurt you intentionally. I love you so much, darling, but I am weak. Weak to my own habits. I hid all this from you because I didn’t want to drive you away. I was so selfish, keeping you in the dark because I feared if you found out you will be disgusted and you’ll leave”, Thomas says as he cups Guy-Manuel’s face. Guy-Manuel swatted his hands away. “Don’t you dare touch me!  So you love me, huh? So why all this? Are you sleeping with any slaves right now? Do you make love to me then come here and whip then fuck some guy here? God, I’m disgusted, you’re so right about that one”, Guy-Manuel spat.

 

Thomas shook his head. “There’s nobody else but you, love. Only you have me. I came here, I have this obsession over control because….cause….” Thomas started but became lost for words. Guy-Manuel raised his eyebrows, “Come on, Roule. I’m waiting for an explanation. Whether or not I forgive you depend on this so you better not lie.” Thomas took a deep breath. “I am fucked up in the head, Guy-Manuel. Was fucked up since my childhood. I am about to spill everything so this may take a while, OK?”

 

Guy-Manuel stretched his legs, yawning. Crossing his arms, Guy-Manuel said, “I have lots of time, Thomas. You better start explaining now because I’m waiting and you’re wasting my time, so hurry up.” Thomas resigned himself to telling a long story. “I was raised in a fucked up family, it all began when I was seven…”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 13: DARK MONSTER WITHIN ME**

The cane hit his palm, making it sting. Thomas winced, but didn’t say anything more. Thomas had asked to go to a friend’s birthday party, all his friends were going, to which his dad said absolutely no. Thomas had a look and reputation to build and that involved being a classy, well-mannered gentleman. Even though he was only seven. Even though all he wanted to do was to go where all his friends were. But, he was not like all his friends. He was a Bangalter, heir to a business empire. He needed to be different, above petty things that normal, non-business orientated people did. That included birthday parties. He went to weekly classes for speech and etiquette, he was always told what he must say and do to make an impression.

 

“You must train yourself to be a businessman of the highest pedigree. You have to live up to your surname. Petty childish things are not for you”, his father had said. He had made a mistake in the etiquette class, arguing back to the teacher about the birthday party and he was being caned for it. He hated these classes. They all told him what to do, how to dress, what to think. He just wanted to play with his friends. But he was not allowed to. They controlled him, his parents. They dictated him. And he was beginning to hate it.

 

***********

 

When Thomas was about ten, he sat crying in his room. A plain room devoid of anything expressive, just classy and elegant. A sterile showroom instead of what personal space should be. He felt he was becoming a plain design too, instead of a human being with some character in him. His father had told him that he could not learn any music aside classical music. Modern music, the music he heard on the radio and enjoyed was ‘noise’ and of no value to the charismatic businessman. Nor was he allowed watching TV, his father deemed the cartoons childish and was afraid it would make Thomas stupid. Its influence was far too strong and Thomas didn’t have time for stupid, childish things with no educational value. No, he only had time for things that would enrich his caliber.

 

Thomas was beginning to understand that his life was not his at all. His parents dictated everything, tried to mold him into something that they wanted. He was nothing but some project of theirs, creating a perfect heir to their empire.

 

Thomas saw the family cat walking towards him. She came up to him and climbed into his lap, asking for attention. Anger surged through his vein suddenly. The cat was no more a prisoner than he was, they both looked to be having a wonderful life in a luxurious home but it was hell. He felt sorry for the cat, she was nothing but something his mother petted at times. She was not allowed outside to see other cats and nobody in the house paid attention to her. Nobody truly loved her. She was lonely, meowing around seeking attention greedily. Her claws were clipped, she was dressed in ridiculous outfits and she ate the same, boring cat food every day. In short, she was not allowed to even look like a cat. Instead she looked like a cat-clown. The cat and Thomas was the same, just something his parents could control and dictate to their liking.

 

 He petted the cat gently, making her purr. She was the only thing that could ever understand how he felt. She was the only thing he loved. He wanted to let her outside, to go live with the other cats, to be free of this lush prison. But how will she survive? She knows nothing of life outside the house, how to hunt or how to avoid trouble. She will be killed by other, mean stray cats for sure. He made a split second decision. He strangled the cat, watching the life drain out of her until she was no more. Afterwards he cried, cried because he knew some monster was rising within him. The monster was a dark, evil entity fueled by his depression and rage.

 

***************

 

Thomas was sitting on a plush, soft sofa and watching the maids with a haughty look on his face. The maids scurried about, feeling scared of the young boy’s stare. Thomas was a teenager, about fourteen. He was dreaded among the maids and cooks, he was cruel and unforgiving. The maid hated it when he was around and he was back from boarding school for the summer holidays. Last week, a new maid had turned up the iron a little too hot while ironing his shirt. The extra heat burnt a small hole in his shirt, and the scent of something burning had wafted through the air, reaching the young boy’s nose.

 

The maid was scared and trying her level best to get rid of the shirt before anybody found out. “Ahem”, Thomas cleared his throat, making his presence in the room known. The maid gasped, the young master was known to be very moody and critical. Thomas walked in slowly and took the shirt the maid was holding. “What do we have here?” Thomas said as he inspects the shirt. He glared at the maid with a mildly annoyed look, making her fear for her job. “Wow, you actually manage to burn a hole in my shirt. My expensive shirt. My very expensive, designer shirt.”

 

The maid tried to reason out with him. “I’m so sorry, sir. You can deduct my salary for the next six months to cover for the cost of the shirt. Just don’t tell your parents, please! I really need this job to pay for my tuition at college”, she begged the boy. Surely he was not as evil as the others told her? After all, he was now smiling mildly at her, as though he would let her off the hook. Thomas tossed the shirt to the side.  “Well, it seems you desperately need the job and you need the money. So no need to pay for it. I didn’t even like the damm shirt.”

 

Thomas grinned at her with a very mischievous look. “But of course, I need you to do something for me. You know, to keep my mouth shut. If you help me and make my life easy, I’ll help you too.” The maid eyed him nervously. “Ok”, she whispered. Thomas clapped his hands together, happy. “Good. I really needed help with this anyway.” Thomas made the poor maid hand wash all his clothes in perfumed water then iron them, reorganize his whole cupboard, rearrange all his books in alphabetical order and do all his homework. He eyed her carefully all the while, enjoying making her squirm and jump when he told her that she was doing something wrong and that she had to start over. He was really enjoying having control over others, having them go through difficulty he put them through. Forget that, he loved it.  

 

*************

 

When Thomas was eighteen, he went to university, for once far away from his parents. He finally felt able to breath. He has a solid wall of disregard for his father. When he was younger, he did so many things, achieved so many things to please his father. When he was a star student he was a good child. Screw up and he was some trash that needed to get a better outlook in life. A psychiatrist told his mother that he was screwed up. That he had depression and a control fetish. That he had this desire to make others suffer at times. This was years ago and Thomas has been popping pills ever since. His mother hugged him at times. Crying and telling him that she knew they were unfair, and that she was so, so sorry that they put the burden of being a Bangalter on him.

 

He had scoffed at that and told her there was no way she could fix him. He was screwed up for life. And it was all their fault. He enjoyed the look of guilt and hurt on his mother’s face. Served her right for being a selfish bitch. He was constantly told what was expected of him, he never had a chance to tell anybody what he really wanted. He had no semblance of control over his life whatsoever. Thus, he exerted it over those he can.

 

The girls he dated briefly in school. The maids. Other people who had to depend on him. He enjoyed finding out dirt on his teachers and threatening them. He enjoyed making them feel that their life was out of control. He began going to Rossette some time ago. He liked it. He liked snatching control from others and making them feel like he had his whole life, that they can’t have any say in their life. He liked being a sadist. The monster in him was content when he was. That monster that longed for control and dominance. The monster that was also lonely all his life. He’s going to stop his pills tomorrow. He found a better way to solve his problems. He gave his monster a name. His name is Roule.

 

*************

 

Thomas was watching his beloved sleep in his lap. They just had their first date.  He took advantage of the situation and brought his beloved to his home as he wanted to spend more time with him. Thomas moved his chocolate locks aside. He felt peaceful, his monster was purring happily. They both wanted the same thing, this angel in front of them. This angel that was theirs and theirs alone. For once, Thomas felt that somebody else could see him for who he really was, who he had wanted to be all along. With his love, he felt alive, felt like he was the person he had buried deep inside and not the person his parents and society had wanted him to be. His love knew him the way he actually was and loved him. For once, he felt somebody could truly love him, make him feel that he was all right the way he was.

 

*************

 

“I was raised in a fucked up family. It all started when I was seven.” Thomas poured out everything to his beloved. How he was trained to be something he was not. How he was never allowed to be himself. How he yearned to have any form of control in his life. “Everything was about what my parents expected of me. I could never tell them what I really liked or what I wanted to do. Friends that I had were handpicked by my parents. Julian is my only true friend. When I was ten, a monster came into being within me. All my angst, my depression, it led to me killing a cat.”

 

Guy-Manuel gasped, his eyes widened in shock. “But why? Why kill an innocent kitty?” he asked, shock thick in his voice. Thomas told him how he felt pity for the cat. In the house she suffered. Outside she would be killed. So Thomas just sent her to a better place. “But it didn’t stop there. I found that I started to enjoy inflicting my control on others. I controlled them by force, by fear. But it was about petty things. Like making the maids suffer or threatening the teacher into giving me good grades. I became a pretender. At the front, I pretended I was this suave, charismatic businessman. At the back, I was this needy, childish person whose anger flared at the slightest of things. I…I began to enjoy snatching control. I just snatched it away and rendered others helpless. It gave me mental balance to know that I could make others suffer as I had, even if it was a millisecond. Pills never helped me. They just made me sleep more.”

 

Thomas hung his head in shame. He had a problem, he knew that. He could guess what Guy-Manuel’s next question would be. “Why didn’t you get help other than the meds? Like support groups, letting your angst go…” Guy-Manuel trailed off as Thomas looked into his eyes. Guy-Manuel had his answer. “This place. The very fact that you can have such profound control on others makes you feel ok. It’s like therapy for you. It avoided all that angst from surfacing in the real world.” Thomas nodded at that.

 

“I heard about a practice where people actually enjoy controlling and being controlled. I joined the BDSM circuits, joining fetish plays. Soon, just controlling people during sex became insufficient. I had to have total control. I became an all-time freak. So, when I heard that such places exist for hardcore people, I looked for it. And I came here,” Thomas explained, hoping his beloved would understand. “But you left…why?” Guy-Manuel whispered. Thomas looked down again, finding that he couldn’t tolerate looking into Guy-Manuel’s eyes for long.

 

“Here, I controlled everything. I kept control on my slaves with an iron grip. But mostly, if they asked to be let go of, because they couldn’t take it anymore, I let them go. Even if the term signed isn’t over. It was all consensual, these people I controlled enjoyed being controlled. There was another master who didn’t very much agree.” Guy-Manuel began playing with the hem of his shirt, a sign he was uneasy. Thomas continued anyway, “Sir Azmuth, once the lead house master here. He…he was really a sadist. He never knew when to stop, didn’t want to stop. There was this girl. She begged him to be released as she fell in love. He told her that she was his property. She had to finish her contract first before being with the one she loved. She…she was caught. Turned out she dated another anyway. Azmuth beat the crap out of her and the guy. They landed in the hospital close to death. That’s when I got scared. I didn’t want to be like that. Even though we kicked Azmuth out, that kind of violence going against our rules and all, I still left. I began to fear of what I might become if I stayed.”

 

 Thomas let out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding. “Why wasn’t this Azmuth guy arrested?” Guy-Manuel asked, suddenly feeling scared of this guy. “Azmuth is a very influential politician. They didn’t even dare press charges against him. This place has links to the underground. These kinds of places are normally not tolerated by the normal society and shit goes on here. They were scared Azmuth would get some gang member to kill them. He’s that powerful” Thomas answered. A long moment of silence ensued. The silence got so unbearable that Thomas felt he was drowning in air. 

 

“Please, love, please say something…anything”, Thomas pleaded. Guy-Manuel sighed heavily. “What’s there to say Thomas? You are a control freak. An extreme one. You also happen to love to beat the crap out of people during sex. Not to mention that you hid all this from me and even after I asked you to come clean you chose not to. I can’t handle this, my brain is in overload. I just…I can’t”, Guy-Manuel said in a low, sad tone. Thomas felt fear grip his heart. “What do you mean by that? Guy-Manuel?” Thomas knew the answer but he still wished that Guy-Manuel would not say it.

 

Guy-Manuel closed his eyes, a pained expression on his face. “I can’t make myself suffer like this. I can’t accept this. It’s in your very nature, this impulsive control”, Guy-Manuel said. Thomas swallowed, trying to get rid of the lump in his throat and failing spectacularly. “I try my best darling. I love you so much. I will never, ever hurt you. I just…I just get so angry when I see you do things to yourself. I get angrier and desperate when I can’t make you stop hurling. I can’t control your being bulimic. I can’t take not being able to make you stop, so I try and force you into doing it. Honey…I only felt that way because I care for you and I hate to see you harm yourself. Please don’t leave me”, Thomas’ voice was filled with sorrow.

 

Guy-Manuel just laughed a scary strained laugh before biting his lip and looking at the ceiling. “You hurt me beyond imagination, Thomas…and you will never stop hurting me, just by being the very person that you are, so…” was all he said before standing up and walking to the door, dragging his feet lethargically. “I need to get my things from your place.” Thomas felt his heart clench tightly. He woke up with difficulty and led Guy-Manuel to the exit. As they sat in the car and Liam drove them to Thomas’ place, the air was somber and Thomas wished he could bring back time, go back and change so many things.

 

Carla rushed into the living hall when she heard them arrive, wanting to tell them that she had prepared a very delicious dinner for them. Seeing their faces, she kept silent, sensing the sad atmosphere. Thomas waited in the living hall as Guy-Manuel got his things. When he saw his love come into the living hall, Thomas rushed towards him and hugged him tightly. “Thomas please…please don’t make this hard”, Guy-Manuel whispered, holding back tears. Thomas released him then kneeled in front of Guy-Manuel, making him shocked. “Wha-what are you doing?” Guy-Manuel asked. Thomas kept his gaze on the carpeting. “I surrender control to you willingly, Guy-Manuel. My love for you overwhelms everything. I’ll be your slave as long as I have you near. You can punish me all you want, do anything you want with me but please…please don’t leave me. I can’t…can’t live without you” Thomas pleaded with his lover.

 

“No”, Guy-Manuel said in a very tiny voice and Thomas looked up, “no, things don’t work this way. I just had my heart ripped out and shredded into tiny ribbons. No amount of punishment will make this hurt go away. Don’t…think you can fix this now. Just…please give me some space ok?” Thomas stood up and cupped his lover’s face. “Are we…are we ok? Are you leaving for good?” Thomas asks, afraid of the answer. Guy-Manuel took in a deep breath and answered with his eyes closed, “I need to think. I just need to be alone and think. My internship ends in a week. Then I’ll go home for a bit. Just…let me go home where I can think calmly ok? Just leave me be for a while.”

 

Thomas nodded and kissed Guy-Manuel, hard on the lips. “Just remember that I love you more than anything in my life. I can live without controlling others but I can’t live without you. I would rather die. I will always, always love you Guy-Manuel, I will love you until the day the stars burn out and the universe withers away and dies.” Guy-Manuel pushed Thomas away abruptly, emotions a hurricane enraging within him right now and ran off to the door, sobbing. Carla ran after him, looking to console him. Thomas glanced to his side and saw Liam there. “Make sure he gets home safe, Liam. Send him home safely”, Thomas said, to which Liam nodded and left. Thomas paced around for a while before crashing onto the plush sofa.

 

He heard Carla run in. “He’s leaving, sir! He’s crying and distraught, sir. Liam promised he will send him home, sir.” Thomas ignored her, feeling dejected. After what felt like hours, or maybe it had been minutes, Thomas finally found some strength in himself to wake up and go to his bedroom. He checked to see if Guy-Manuel left anything, any sign that he intended to return. What he found left behind made him feel like crying. The blue silken pajama, the one that Thomas gave Guy-Manuel and the one Guy-Manuel had been wearing when they first made love, was the only thing Guy-Manuel left behind. Guy-Manuel had left it back in his despair. Guy-Manuel had left behind the symbol of their love, a symbol of the time they had become one.

 

Thomas sank to the ground and howled, his grief of his loss so profound that it consumed him. He just howled and cried, wishing that he hadn’t done the mistakes he did.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 14: SCREAMS OF DISTRESS**

“Thomas, what’s wrong with you? Thomas!” Marie Bangalter was screaming as she shook her son, desperate to get his attention. Thomas just sighed as he came out of yet another deep thought. Carla had called her earlier and told her Thomas had been acting weird the whole day long. Thomas had completely shut down and remained in his room, doing nothing but staring into space. Marie had been trying to distract Thomas from unsettling thought but she didn’t succeed, judging by the way Thomas’ mind would zone out every ten minutes or so.

 

Thomas gave a shrill laugh, the most insincere laugh he’d given his mother. “There’s nothing wrong with me at all, mum. Oh, except for the fact that I drove away the love of my live, and that it was my fault since I hurt him so bad. What hope do I have in ever getting him back again?” Thomas puts his face in his hands, hiding the pained expression on his face. “None. Nada. He’s never gonna forgive me. I’ve lost him, forever.” Marie patted her son’s shoulder, trying to be a reassuring presence for once. She was trying to be there for her son this time and patch up her relationship with her only child, given that she was never a good mother to him while he was growing up.

 

“Tell me something, Thomas, is he the only one? Like the one who’s your other half?” Marie asked Thomas. Thomas sighed heavily. “He’s the one and only, mum. I feel it in every part of me. I will never love another as much as I love him and I will never truly be happy if I don’t have him by my side. I…” Thomas was lost of words to even begin explaining how much Guy-Manuel meant to him, the entirety of how he felt so deeply for his love. So he said simply, “I’d rather die than to go on like this. I can’t take it anymore. I just miss him so much. I just wanna run to him and hold him, tell him I’m so, so sorry and that I love him so much, please don’t leave me.”

 

“Then why don’t you? He’s still in the city, I’m sure. Go to his apartment, tell him before he leaves”, Marie told Thomas in a pleading tone, it was obvious that’s what Thomas had to do right now. Thomas just shook his head. “You don’t know him and you didn’t see the hurt on his face. I broke his heart to pieces and trampled on it. By hiding something so big I made a mockery to what our love meant. I’m not the person he fell for, and that’s the greatest betrayal one can ever do. Such a great lie. He deserves his space after that, mum, definitely.”

 

Guy-Manuel’s internship ended today. Thomas had to endure being there while Guy-Manuel’s colleagues hugged him and said their goodbyes, while Guy-Manuel ignored him completely. Thomas wanted so much to be able to hold him and talk to him like they all did. Thomas had a sliver of hope that after a whole week of being apart, Guy-Manuel would at least talk to him, even if it was a brief goodbye and handshake. Apparently no. Guy-Manuel will be going back home for two weeks before returning to the city. Two long weeks for Thomas to wait for his love to calm down in his natural habitat then return with his decision. But he was the one who screwed up royally and now he was suffering for it.

 

***********

 

Guy-Manuel rushed in and hugged his mother the moment he reached home. His mother sensed something was wrong from the way her son was behaving immediately. “What’s wrong Guy? Why do you look so sad?” she asked with tenderness only a mother could have. Guy-Manuel didn’t answer her, but instead he released his death grip on her to briefly hug his dad then Paul. Guy-Manuel was reclusive, not even chatting as he usually did. Even Paul could feel the gloomy vibe surrounding Guy-Manuel, especially when he dragged himself up the stairs to his room. He collapsed on his bed and started crying.

 

There was a teddy bear on his desk, one he had since he was a child and used to hug in his sleep when he was very little. He grabbed it and hugged it immediately, clutching it to his chest and inhaling its familiar, comforting scent. He was so absorbed in his own grief that he didn’t notice that his mother had opened the door and see him crying before shutting the door again. Paul looked at her with a questioning stare. “He’s crying. That bastard hurt my baby”, she said as she passed her younger son and walked into her bedroom.  

 

**************

 

Six days in and Paul could not take it anymore. He has never seen his elder brother so depressed, not even when he came out as being gay and was bullied in school. Not even when his high school boyfriend dumped him because he didn’t want to have sex. He hardly ate anything at all, Paul was damm sure he ate nothing at all the day before (Paul didn’t see him leave the second floor at all) and all he did was stay in his room, listening to music or reading. Guy refused to tell Paul anything when he asked why he was so down, saying he was perfectly all right. But last night Guy had lay down their mother’s laps and cried out his heart. Paul happened to be there and he hid behind the bedroom door, listening in. “Does it always hurt so much to love?” Guy-Manuel had asked his mother between sobs.

 

“It takes a lot of strength to love, Guy. It’s not easy to give so much of yourself to another”, she soothed him as she petted his thigh, attempting to lull him into sleep as she did when he was a baby. “But…but how if the person you love turns out to have a dark side?” Guy curled himself into a ball, “And you know he loves you back and he’ll do anything for you, but still…it hurts so bad that he hid things from you.” Paul felt he got all the information he needed from that. His elder brother’s boyfriend, Thomas, had hurt him.

 

Paul told his mother that something needs to be done. His mother told him to cool his head, couples argue all the time and Guy-Manuel had always been a sensitive boy. “After all, he told me that he knows Thomas loves him a lot and that Thomas did what he did because he was afraid of losing Guy-Manuel.” Paul could not accept that. Not when his elder brother was miserable. His whole life, Guy-Manuel had always been there for him, cared for him so much that he was almost a second mother to Paul.

 

After all, if Guy-Manuel is right and Thomas loved him, Thomas would want to make this right. Maybe Thomas was angry too, and they were both being idiots and not talking to each other. Still, Paul was angry and he wanted to have a word with the guy that managed to make his brother a crying mess. He wanted to let Thomas now that he can’t get away with emotionally abusing his brother. That he’ll protect his brother no matter what happened.

 

*****************

 

Marie Bangalter was going out for lunch with her son Thomas when they heard a commotion in the lobby. “I don’t care! I must see Bangalter junior, this is important!” A young boy with brown, fluffy hair was yelling at a receptionist. The receptionist huffed, “These are important people, young man. You can’t just stride in here and ask to meet the owners of a multibillion company. If you’re nobody important, don’t demand things like that. Please don’t shout at me, it’s not my fault.”

 

Marie walked to the source of the commotion and asked. “What’s the problem?” The receptionist shrugged before saying in a sarcastic voice, “I’m so sorry, this boy came out of nowhere and started demanding to meet Mr. Thomas, and he just THINKS he has something important….” The receptionist never had a chance to finish because Paul started yelling first. “I don’t care if you’re rich and powerful! You’ve got to answer for things you’ve done! Having money doesn’t give you the right to meddle with other people’s hearts, you know? You don’t even care if anybody gets hurt, you just do whatever you like.  We’re normal, not rolling in money people so it’s ok to play with our feelings?”

 

Marie was bewildered, but she had an inkling of why the boy was yelling here. Thomas immediately stepped forward. Paul snapped his head to look at Thomas, his glare full of anger. “I’m Thomas Bangalter. Now tell me what is so important that you have to shout in the middle of lobby”, Thomas said as he crossed his arms, haughty. He never expected what came next. “I wanna know what the hell you did to my brother! You broke him, you jerk! You don’t have a right to stand there looking at me as though I’m some troublemaker”, Paul told Thomas in a low voice that shivered with anger.

 

Thomas looked at the young boy’s features. Pretty and flowy chocolate color hair, blue eyes, lips a thin line… ‘Oh god, don’t tell me’ Thomas though but his mother finished it for him. “Guy-Manuel. You’re Guy-Manuel’s brother?” Marie asked, her features softening. All the anger seemed to leave Paul at once. He just looked down and nodded, he looked sad all of a sudden. “What’s wrong with him?” Thomas whispers, his heart heavy. “Is-is he ok?”

 

Paul snorted, “He’s far from ok.” Marie glanced at Thomas and says, “I’ll go for lunch by myself, go settle this. In your office, please, I don’t want a show in the middle of the lobby.” Marie nodded at Paul and walked off. Thomas motioned for Paul to follow him and Paul did, much to the surprise of the people around them. Who would’ve though some kid had something important to say that Thomas Bangalter wanted to hear anyway? All the way to his office, a million thoughts went through Thomas’ head. ‘Was he ok? Is he eating? Did he do something to himself? Oh god, what did he do until his brother felt compelled to come here? Did he tell his brother about Rossette?’

 

The moment they entered the office and Thomas shut the door, he asked Paul, “Is he ok? Did he do anything to himself? Wha-Why…” Thomas looked away, worry for his love eating at his heart. Paul looked at Thomas, judging his reaction and considering if he wanted to shout some more. Thomas looked pained, as though the thought of Guy-Manuel in any sort of difficulty was something he could not bear. Paul felt that Thomas should know that Guy-Manuel was depressed, maybe he could go console his brother. “He’s very sad. He’s gloomy and he cries a lot. He’s not eating, he’s not talking to anybody…it’s like life has been sucked out from him”, Paul said slowly, seeing Thomas wince at every word he said.

 

“Oh god…” Thomas walks to the couch and sits down, he feels that his legs might just give out. “Does he know you are here? Did he tell you anything at all?” Thomas asks, his voice heavy. Thomas didn’t know how to face Guy-Manuel’s family if he really did tell them why he was so hurt. Paul shook his head. “Nobody knows anything at all. I heard him tell maman that you hurt him because you lied or something…but he said he knew you loved him and you’d do anything for him so I figured I’d come and tell you that he was miserable…I came here by myself, I told maman that I was going out with friends and figured I could go back before nightfall” Paul said, looking at the floor as he fiddled with the hem of his sweater.

 

Thomas nodded at that. He took in a deep breath and leaned back into his couch. His love was crushed that he lied to him. His love was sad and crying and it was his entire fault. He made his decision. “Look kid, I need you to help me with this….”

 

*********** 

 

Guy-Manuel was sitting in his room, doing a watercolor painting. He found that it distracted him for copious amounts of time, giving him some peace. He was doing a panting of the countryside, focusing himself on the memories from his happy childhood. He heard his mother call him downstairs. Dunking the brush into the glass of now murky water, Guy-Manuel wiped his hands on his pajama top as he opened the door and ran down the stairs.

 

His mother was standing in the middle of the hall, fidgeting. “What’s wrong maman?” he asked, seeing his mother behaving like that made him nervous. “Your friends are here to see you”, she said and Pharrell and Pedro came in from the hallway and bear hugged him, making him laugh. “Oh god, you guys came here!” he managed between laughs, happy to see his flat mates. “Yeah, since you were feeling down, we decided to come cheer you up”, Pedro said, squeezing Guy-Manuel’s shoulder. “Yeah dude. We came to see you”, Pharrell said to a beaming Guy-Manuel, “but there’s somebody else here to see you also. He asked us to come along in case you freak out or something.”

 

Guy-Manuel’s face fell immediately. ‘No. No, not him. Not here, not now.’ Guy-Manuel shook his head as he distanced himself from his flat mates. Pedro gripped his arm, afraid that he may run off. “You need to talk to him, Guy-Manuel. Moping around won’t help anything”, Pharrell said. Guy-Manuel tried frantically to pull him arm free and escape but it was too late. He felt Thomas before he saw him come in. “No..nonononono…” Guy-Manuel chanted, shaking his head and wanting to get away.

 

Thomas walked slowly to him and nodded to Pedro. Pedro let go of Guy-Manuel and everybody else filed out of the living hall and waited in the hallway, leaving Thomas and Guy-Manuel alone. Thomas’ heart broke at the sight of his beloved. Guy-Manuel looked sick. He lost some weight, his face was pale and there were dark circles under his eyes. His hair was unkempt and tangled and his lips parched and dry. He looked so weak he might fall over any moment. Thomas held Guy-Manuel’s shoulders gently.

 

 Guy-Manuel looked up to meet Thomas’ eyes. Guy-Manuel felt his heart melt. Thomas’ eyes were filled with so much love and compassion. He was here because he cared for Guy-Manuel. He loved Guy-Manuel so much he put aside his ego and pride and came all the way here because he knew Guy-Manuel was hurting. “What have you done to yourself, my love?” Thomas asked his love. Guy-Manuel felt like giving in and telling Thomas that he loved him so much. That he was hurting because he couldn’t live without Thomas and yet he was finding it difficult to accept that part of Thomas that made him a sadist, making him conflicted. 

 

Since he left, Guy-Manuel felt like he couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t sleep, he couldn’t do anything right. He yearned for Thomas so much that he couldn’t think straight, Thomas’ love was like a drug he had to have in his system all the time. Yet, he didn’t want to give in. He felt that his emotions were clouding his rational mind and rationally, who would subject themselves to a lifetime of being hurt by a person who most probably only intended to enslave him? So, he used another emotion to fight his yearning. He channeled anger, pure and raw from within him and it burned through his mind and gave him the strength to turn Thomas away. He could always cry later.

 

“More like what you did to me, you sneaky little rat”, Guy-Manuel spat venomously before swatting Thomas’ hand. “Guy-Manuel, darling, I know you’re angry as you should be…”

 

“Blah, blah, blah… nothing I’ve not heard before. You have a lot of nerve showing up here after I told you to leave me for a bit”, Guy-Manuel said as he squinted his eyes, glaring at Thomas with such intensity that Thomas actually felt scared for once. “Wow, Guy-Manuel, what’s gotten into you?” Thomas asked him. He never saw Guy-Manuel like this before and this didn’t suit him at all. His love was a shy, quiet angel, not the fiery and rude person in front of him.

 

It was almost like Guy-Manuel was possessed or something. Then it hit Thomas. Guy-Manuel was so hurt that he couldn’t’ think coherently anymore, so he is using anger as a defense mechanism against the one who was hurting him. Thomas. The though itself hit Thomas like a ton of bricks. Meanwhile, Guy-Manuel was stepping backward, away from Thomas. “What’s gotten into me? Really? REALLY?” Guy-Manuel shouted suddenly, his pale face growing red with anger.

 

Thomas lunged forward and held him. “Love, I’m so sorry I hurt you, I will never do that again in my life, ever. I want you back, honey, please just listen to me”, Thomas pleaded. Guy-Manuel pushed Thomas away with all the strength he had in his frail body. “Saying sorry isn’t gonna make it go away, it just hurts so bad…” Guy-Manuel felt his eyes sting with the threat of tears again. ‘No, I’m not gonna cry in front of him, this whole thing happened because I was weak, I let him control me. He’s just here for weak little me, a boyfriend he can make his slave.’

 

Thomas sensed Guy-Manuel’s line of though and tried to prove him wrong. “I’m here because I love you more than anything in my life, I’m here to fight for your love. Even if I have to slog, I will, because I will fight for what we have. I will never let go of you, my love.” Guy-Manuel laughed like a maniac. Paul ran back into the room, panicked. “Is everything ok? Guy, why the hell are you laughing like that?” Paul asked, feeling eerie hearing that laugh.

 

“Oh everything was just fine, Paul, that is, until had to bring him here, you little rascal!” Paul was appalled at the way his elder brother was talking. Guy-Manuel was clearly not himself right now. “It’s ok Paul, I’ll handle this”, Thomas reassured him. Guy-Manuel flared again, “Handle me like you always do. Yup you handle me just fine, tell me what I gotta do, master?” Guy-Manuel said, suddenly changing his tone to mocking a scared one. “Guy-Manuel stop that”, Thomas warned. “Or if not what?” Guy-Manuel challenged. “Come hurt me, I’d feel better after that I’m sure. I can see why slaves love this torture things”, Guy-Manuel laughed.

 

Thomas couldn’t think about what to do. Guy-Manuel had lost his mind completely, he was angry one moment then laughing madly the next one. Oh god… “Are you happy Thomas? You enslaved my heart and soul! You actually really did it! Bravo to Thomas”, Guy-Manuel said, clapping. Thomas felt cold dread sweep over him. Is that what Guy-Manuel thought his love was? A means to enslave him? “Honey, no…you’re not my slave, I never wanted to make you a slave…”, Thomas says then hugs Guy-Manuel again,... “I want you as my lover, for me to share my life and grow old with. I’ll never enslave you like that.”

 

Guy-Manuel struggled against Thomas’ hold, not wanting to be near Thomas at all. He could feel himself giving in, he wanted Thomas far too much to resist him. His body and soul belonged only to Thomas, same as Thomas’ body and soul belonged to him, and they wanted to be reunited, to be complete again. With every embrace Thomas gave him, Guy-Manuel felt the distance between them closing rapidly. No, that can’t happen yet.

 

Guy-Manuel pushed Thomas away with all his might, which was not much. He was feeling dizzy already from the emotional stress he was going through. “So, why are you here, if not to claim your slave? You say you want a submissive me, right? Control my being bulimic?” Guy-Manuel whispered. Thomas thought carefully for an answer. “Yes honey, I came for you, but I came to take my boyfriend back, not my slave. Yes, I do wish at times I can control your hurling…”

 

“THAT’S IT! YOU’RE GOING TO CONTROL ME” Guy-Manuel screeched. Thomas was panicking now, Guy-Manuel had become paranoid and was hearing everything he said the wrong way. “Honey, calm down, please!” Thomas pleaded, desperation thick in his voice.  “I just wished you can stop, its better…”

 

“WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO DETERMINE WHATS BETTER FOR ME?” Guy-Manuel screeched again. He put both his hands in his hair and began yanking them, making Thomas more panicked. Guy-Manuel was having a full meltdown here, one that has been caused by days of pent up sorrow and paranoia. Shutting his eyes and pulling his hair hard, Guy-Manuel started yelling some more, “I’LL HURL IF I WANNA HURL! THAT’S MY RIGHT! I CAN EVEN KILL MYSELF IF I WANT TO! IT’S MY LIFE, MY CHOICE! DON’T YOU EVER, EVER DARE TELL ME WHAT TO DOOOO!”

 

Pedro and Pharell ran into the area, sensing that Guy-Manuel was about to do something really crazy. “Guy, calm down and breath please”, Paul said. Guy-Manuel snapped his head to glare in his direction.  “So you’re gonna control me too? Because I love you as a younger brother you’re gonna use that to order me around?” Paul couldn’t believe what Guy-Manuel was saying. His older brother was being really crazy right now.  “Guy, I’m not telling you anything, I just..”

 

Guy-Manuel suddenly jumped onto the coffee table, swinging his arms around madly. He was starting to get really dizzy from all the tension. “Attention to the whole-fucking-world”, he began, waving his arm around. Guy-Manuel’s mother had started crying, seeing her son have a meltdown and acting crazy is not something she could endure calmly. “I, Guillaume Emmanuel, am announcing that I’m never gonna let anybody, ANY-FUCKING-BODY TELL ME WHAT TO DO EVER AGAIN” Guy-Manuel started out calm but started shouting again.

 

He jumped on the table, like a little child jumping in a puddle of mud. Guy-Manuel’s mother ran out the room, unable to take any more of this. “STAY FAR AWAY FROM ME!” he yelled when Thomas tried to come near him. He was like a wild animal, scared and furious. Pedro looked warily at Thomas. “I SEE WHAT YOU’RE DOING! YOU ALL WANNA CONTROL ME! WELL NEVER!” Pharrell cursed under his breath, lost to how to handle his friend in this situation.

 

“Guy-Manuel, please stop shouting”, Thomas said but regretted it moments later. “Don’t fucking tell me what to do! Never ever TELL ME WHAT TO DO!” Guy-Manuel was seeing black spots in his vision now. “EVERYBODY THINKS I’M WEAK AND THEY THINK THEY CAN CONTROL ME! WELL I SAY FUCK OFF!” Paul gasped, horrified. “DID YOU NOT HEAR ME? FUCK OFF!”

 

Guy-Manuel’s hand went to his hair again, pulling random locks of hair with horrifying strength. Pharrell went forward, trying to get Guy-Manuel to come down from the coffee table. “DON’T YOU GUYS DARE COME NEAR ME! GET OUT OF MY SIGHT! FUCK OFF, HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT, FUCKKK OOOOOFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!” Guy-Manuel screamed his throat horse. He was really light headed now from all that screaming.

 

“Oh for god’s sake, Guy-Manuel, get down from there and calm the fuck down!” Thomas screamed. Guy-Manuel looked at Thomas through his crazy hair that was everywhere now, including in front his face. “What did you tell me to do?” Guy-Manuel whispered. “You’re ordering me aren’t you?” Thomas, frantic and scared that Guy-Manuel will harm himself told him, “No, I’m not ordering you. I’m just asking really nicely if maybe, just maybe, you’ll come down from there and we can talk? Even if you don’t want to talk, at least please get down from there? Pretty please ”

 

A few moments filled with pure tension passed and that seemed like forever to Thomas. Suddenly Guy-Manuel started laughing. “Hahaha, asking nicely, hahaha…” Pedro looked at Pharrell nervously. They may have to manhandle Guy-Manuel before he harmed himself, if it came down to it. Pharrell said slowly, “We are just gonna come help you off the table, ok?”  When they approached the table, he began yelling again. 

 

“DIDN’T YOU HEAR ME? I SAID FUCK OFF!!!” Guy-Manuel closed his eyes and kept on yelling “FUCK OFF, FUCK OFF, FUCK OFF” as the three of them pleaded with him to just stop yelling and get off the table. “YOU ALL THINK YOU CAN CONTROL ME, BUT I’LL NEVER LET IN! NEVER!” Guy-Manuel couldn’t feel his feet on the ground anymore. “YOU WILL NEVER MAKE ME YOUR SLAVE, NEVER!” Guy-Manuel felt his head swim in and out of consciousness, his vision going black.

 

“NEEVVEEERRRRR….” Guy-Manuel screamed as his whole body became limp and he fell off the coffee table. Thomas, who was nearest to him rushed forward to hold him. “Never”, Guy-Manuel whispered against Thomas’ chest, he felt Thomas carrying him and that was the last thing he knew before his mind became completely black and he passed out.

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 15: HOSPITAL BLUES**

Guy-Manuel saw black all around him, his head heavy with sleep. He tried to open his eyes but failed, his eyelids too lazy to comply with his will. He heard vague sounds around him and wondered where he was. Hearing hushed voices, he strained his ears to focus and make out the words that those people were speaking. He heard a man say, “Will he be ok? I mean, he’s not in any danger is he?” Guy-Manuel frowned inwardly. Thomas. The voice belonged to Thomas and he sounded worried.

 

“No, not at all. He was just under high stress and given that he didn’t eat properly for so long, his body had become very weak. Shouting like that was the final straw.” His mother. His mother was talking to Thomas and she sounded worried too. Why were they so worried? What happened to him? Guy-Manuel tried as hard as he could to open his eyes, to move anything but his body felt a thousand tons and he couldn’t even lift his pinky. He heard a soft beeping sound coming from somewhere.

 

There was a flurry of sounds and he felt somebody touch his arm. “I’m afraid I have to ask you to leave. You’re disturbing the patient, his heart rate is spiking”, a voice Guy-Manuel couldn’t place said in a very stern voice. A few seconds later, the smell of Thomas’ cologne and warmth enveloped him. Guy-Manuel immediately relaxed, feeling protected by Thomas’ presence. “The nurse is chasing me away. I will come back when I’m allowed ok? I’ll be right outside. Please wake up soon”, Thomas whispered in his ear before he kissed his cheek.

 

Thomas petted him lovingly before moving away. He missed Thomas’ warmth immediately. Guy-Manuel didn’t want him to go. He was scared of this darkness around him and he felt lonely and so empty. He tried to move his mouth to make the words come out, to ask Thomas to stay but he couldn’t. “Sleep now, don’t fight it”, the unknown voice said and true enough, Guy-Manuel felt himself melt into the darkness where he came from once more.

 

*********

 

Thomas left the room with heavy feet. He wanted to be there beside Guy-Manuel but the nurse had told him and Mrs. De Homem Christo to leave, citing that they were disturbing Guy-Manuel. Thomas sat on the seat outside. “Do you want to go anywhere? I’m leaving, I have work and Paul has school tomorrow so we need to sleep. I’ll give you a ride if you need it”, Guy-Manuel’s father told him. Thomas shook his head. “I’m not leaving his side. I left him before and see where it got us. I won’t make the same mistake again.” The de Homem Christos left a while later, leaving Thomas to wait alone in the hospital hall.

 

Thomas sighed and resigned himself to patiently waiting. He felt so helpless, all he needed to know was if Guy-Manuel was ok.

 

**********

 

Guy-Manuel could hear Thomas’ voice again. Thomas was reading a book to him, Pippi Longstocking by Roald Dahl to be exact. Guy-Manuel wanted to wake up and hold Thomas. He wanted to tell Thomas he was sorry for screaming and that he loved him, really, and right now all he wanted was for Thomas to hold him and never let him go. He was tired of arguing and resisting his own feelings. It was too late for him to get rid of Thomas’ love from his heart and walk away from their relationship. He would never be happy without Thomas in his life and he felt this more than ever now. Emptiness consumed him and he realized it was Thomas he wanted by his side right now, when he was alone in the darkness that was his own sleepy mind.

 

Even though he was scared that Thomas may control him, he knew he had to risk it. He understood now why many said that love needed acceptance and tolerance. Love is about two people coming together, each with their own unique characters. It was the tolerance and forgiveness that made it work. Accepting who the person was, every bit, all his weakness and strengths. Being by that person and encouraging them when they were weak. Encouraging them to become a better person.

 

Thomas’ weakness was that he constantly felt the need to control others due to the fact that he never had any control over his own growing up. Everybody had their flaws and that was Thomas’. At least Thomas was not an abusive drunkard who beats the crap out of his partners for no apparent reason. Thomas still knew what he did was wrong and felt embarrassed. Thomas was trying his level best to be a better lover for Guy-Manuel. That’s a start at least. In a way, maybe it was good for Guy-Manuel to have somebody like that.

 

Many have told him that he was too quiet and shy, and that he was too scared to venture out into the big, bad world. Many have also told him that he was stubborn about ridiculous things, including things that lowered his self-esteem. So maybe, just maybe, he needed a no-nonsense partner who would dominate him and force him to stop his bulimia and change his view about himself. Maybe, having a dominant in his life would be a stabilizing factor. Guy-Manuel knew he had never felt more confident doing things on his own than when Thomas forced him to do it then encouraged him and told him he was doing great.

 

Guy-Manuel felt heaviness envelope his mind again. Mentally sighing, he wondered when his body would allow him to wake up and tell Thomas all he yearned to tell him. He was feeling bored of swimming in and out of this haze that was fogging his mind and he couldn’t wait for it to clear off so that he could wake up and hold Thomas tightly.

 

********************

 

When Guy-Manuel could finally open his eyes, the first thing he saw was the yellow light from the small chandelier on the ceiling directly above him, which nearly blinded him. He squinted, his eyes paining and he tried to shuffle around a bit. His whole body was lethargic and aching all over. As he slowly started absorbing in his surroundings, he came to the conclusion that he was indeed in the hospital, something he guessed sometime back. He was in a large single room which looked more like a hotel room than a hospital room.

 

The walls were painted a dark creamy pink with dark red drapes, and there were sofas and even a small coffee table at a corner. Guy-Manuel was on IV, the needle causing his hand twinges of pain when he tried to move around. His arm was full of stuff, his thumb was pinched in a peg-like thing and there was a tourniquet too, no doubt to read his heart rate and blood pressure. There was a monitor next to him, one which would probably scream out if his heart rate or blood pressure decided to act up. Something made a creaking sound and Guy-Manuel turned his head slowly to see Thomas sleeping on a chair right next to his bed.

 

Guy-Manuel just looked at him, studying his features. Thomas looked disheveled and tired, worried even when he was asleep. It must have been uncomfortable sleeping in the chair, but Thomas was there because he wanted to be near Guy-Manuel. He smiled, touched, as he knew Thomas loved him with crystal clear certainty now. If not Thomas would never come to his house to say sorry and stay by his side in the hospital like this. Caring for him and waiting patiently for him to wake up. Thomas wanted to be with him, not make him a slave. He watched Thomas sleep, happiness coursing through his veins as he realized that he had indeed, found his soul partner and all his earlier doubts were not true. Maybe he was a little screwed up but loved Guy-Manuel sincerely. That’s all that mattered right now.

 

Thomas woke up when he felt someone’s stare on him. Looking around, he noticed that Guy-Manuel was awake and staring at him. Thomas got out of the chair and went to Guy-Manuel, looking at him carefully. Thomas sat on the bed and held Guy-Manuel’s IV-free hand gently. Guy-Manuel looked calm and he was smiling serenely at Thomas. “You’re not gonna scream now, are you?” Thomas asked nervously. Guy-Manuel shook his head and whispered “No”, and Thomas found he could finally breathe.

 

Thomas cupped Guy-Manuel’s cheek lovingly. “I was so scared this past three days. I thought that you’d wake up and say you never want to see me again…” Thomas choked, tears stinging his eye. Guy-Manuel sighed heavily. “I won’t leave you. I love you, Thomas, if I leave you I’m only ruining myself. That’s the one thing I’ve learned this time.” Thomas let out another relieved breath and pecked Guy-Manuel on the lips gently. “Hmm, but there will be some rules. You can’t order me and hurt my feelings like you did before. Don’t even try to make me into a submissive sex slave. If you do, this time I leave and never come back, ever.”

 

Thomas shuddered at the thought. “You’ve been thinking, now have you?” Thomas asked his love. Guy-Manuel smirked. “What else was I to do? I was so bored, stuck in my own head. How long have I been asleep anyway?” “Nearly four days”, came the reply, making Guy-Manuel’s eyes widen. “Wow, and to think I actually still feel tired”, Guy-Manuel whispered. Thomas laughed at that. “You need lots of rest. You need to eat a lot too.” Thomas hesitated for a moment before dropping the bomb. “The condition you came in…it was quite serious. The doctor is sending you to rehab”, Thomas said, making Guy-Manuel flinch, terror was setting in his brain.

 

“The doctor’s gonna make me go to rehab? Why?” Guy-Manuel asked in a tiny voice, shivering at the thought of being in a prison-like rehab. “Do you know how you ended up here?” Thomas asked, to which Guy-Manuel shook his head. Thomas moved Guy-Manuel’s hair and tucked it behind his ear. “Well, you made yourself extremely weak by not eating at all, made worse by the fact you also stopped drinking water. Your body was starved and dehydrated and it was waiting to breakdown any moment. Screaming around while jumping on a coffee table did that”, Thomas explained slowly.

 

Guy-Manuel covered his face with his hands, embarrassed. “Ugh! I can’t believe I actually jumped on a coffee table and screamed around like a crazy idiot!” Thomas peeled Guy-Manuel’s hands away gently. “Well, it was quite a sight” Thomas said with a laughing tone before his face fell a little, “but we had to tell the doctor the truth. She was quite angry with us for not getting you professional help earlier. She told us people have died due to bulimia.”

 

Guy-Manuel gasped. “I can die?” Thomas nodded. “Apparently so. Given how weak you have made yourself, she made it mandatory for you to go to rehab where you’ll be forced to eat whether you like it or not.” Guy-Manuel played with the tourniquet nervously. “I have no choice? Like if I don’t want to go? I swear I’ll be good and eat properly”, Guy-Manuel whined. “Nope, you must go”, Thomas shook his head , “the doctor told us it’s really a psychological problem and you need help, so that’s the only way you’ll ever kick the habit. I’ve tried by spanking you and your mother’s tried by relentlessly grumbling at you but we just can’t do it. And if we can’t get you to stop, it’s because you actually don’t want to. The doctor said it was for the best. She’s forcing you to go because you need people who understand this problem and can help you deal with it.”

 

Guy-Manuel sighed and looks down at his blankets. “Really? Some strange doctor somewhere knows what’s best for me? How can she even force me to go? It’s not like I attempted suicide or overdosed on drugs or some shit like that”, Guy-Manuel said stubbornly, pulling his blankets closer to him. Thomas’ eyes softened. He understood that Guy-Manuel was scared of rehab. He moved forward to hold Guy-Manuel’s arm gently.

 

“Love, it’s for the best. Maybe the situation isn’t as severe but you are kindda attempting suicide. You are killing yourself slowly and you don’t wanna accept it. You are ill, Guy-Manuel, very ill in fact so the doctor can force you because if not, you will cause substantial harm to yourself. We all will support you. Your mum and dad, Paul, we all want you to get better.  I’ll come see you every single day, I promise.” Thomas takes in a deep breath, he hopes that Guy-Manuel will understand. Seeing that Guy-Manuel looked miserable, Thomas tried to cheer him up. “At least it’s not sadistic me spanking and ordering you to eat but some strict dietician”, Thomas tried joking and failed miserably.

 

“Yeah?” Guy-Manuel quipped, his tone agitated, “how if it’s a really ugly fellow who likes bullying thin and frail people? How if…how if he doesn’t spank me but has a big cane, like the ones they have in school and he cane my ass every time I don’t eat enough? At least you didn’t spank me all the time,” Guy-Manuel pouted. He didn’t like the idea of being under some eating regime. Thomas began playing with Guy-Manuel’s hair.  “Let’s see…” Thomas puts on his thinking face, “…I’ll tell the guy only I can spank or cane you. If he canes you I’ll whip him.” Guy-Manuel laughs at that. “That will scare him off for sure!” Thomas said merrily as he pinched Guy-Manuel’s cheek.

 

Guy-Manuel yawned and stretched. Thomas got off the bed and covered Guy-Manuel with the blankets properly so that he didn’t feel cold. “I’ll go tell the nurse that you’re awake. I’ll get Liam to bring some delicious breakfast full of chocolate and strawberry jam, your absolute favorites for you tomorrow. Rest now, ok?” Thomas said in a tender voice. Guy-Manuel nodded and Thomas kissed his forehead. “Sweet dreams, my love”, Thomas said as he turned off the lights before going out to get the nurse. Guy-Manuel closed his eyes, feeling calmer than he had this past two weeks.  

 

************

 

In the morning, Liam came in with an array of sugary sweet desserts. There were doughnuts, croissants, pancakes and even ice-cream. Thomas had gotten Guy-Manuel a whole bottle of chocolate syrup and a jar of strawberry jam. Guy-Manuel poured, no rained the chocolate sauce on the croissant and immediately began eating. Thomas distracted him by talking to him about tennis and Rafael Nadal so that he didn’t notice that he was eating so much. By the time Guy-Manuel noticed, he already ate three croissants, two doughnuts and several pancakes. “Oh my! I ate like a greedy pig”, Guy-Manuel said as his cheeks became red, showing that he was feeling shy. Thomas laughed before kissing him tenderly.

 

All was well and dandy until the doctor came in. Guy-Manuel immediately became quiet as she checked him over. “How are you feeling this morning, Mr. de Homem Christo? I hope that you are feeling better. I see you have eaten too”, she said gently. “I am perfectly fine. I can eat by myself”, Guy-Manuel said in an angry tone. Thomas immediately sat beside Guy-Manuel and put his arm around his love’s waist, attempting to calm him down. Thomas could hear Guy-Manuel’s breathing become erratic. Thomas was beginning to understand that Guy-Manuel often used anger to hide that he was scared. It was his defense mechanism.

 

“Of course you can eat by yourself, you’re not a baby that needs feeding. The problem lies in whether you want to”, she said in an even tone that meant business. Guy-Manuel leaned into Thomas’ side, suddenly feeling small at the doctor’s authoritative voice. She wasn’t gonna let him off the hook. “You can’t tell me what to do. I won’t go”, Guy-Manuel said in a shaky voice. He was scared all right but he wasn’t about to give up. “I’m sorry, what did you just say?”, the doctor asked as she raised an eyebrow. Guy-Manuel summoned up his stubbornness and fighting spirit. “I said I’m not going to rehab. I don’t want to and I will not. I‘m still fine, I’m clearly not dead yet. When I agree that it’s an obsession and I really need help, I’ll go myself”, Guy-Manuel said in a clear, loud voice. Thomas took in a sharp breath beside him.

 

“You will go to rehab once you’re discharged. I’ll give you a day to get your stuff and all. If you don’t report there, I will call up your parents and send a team over to go get you. Believe me when I say that we have dealt with stubborn patients and we show no mercy”, the doctor added in a firm voice, holding Guy-Manuel’s gaze. “No, you don’t understand, doctor”, Guy-Manuel spat the salutation out, “if I said I will not go, I won’t. I don’t want to get fat, that’s what you want isn’t it? For me to be fat and ugly. I’m sick of being shy, quiet Guy-Manuel, the weakling that is being ordered around. I’ll do whatever I think makes me look good. Go to hell, prissy bitch.” Thomas looked at the doctor apologetically. He never knew Guy-Manuel had a stubborn side. A very stubborn side with an anger to boot.

 

The doctor nodded. “I’ll be sure to tell them that you’re very sensitive about your weight and that you have self-esteem issues. And yeah, I’ll add in the fact that you’re taking very fondly to using anger and crude language to hide the fact that you’re actually scared, you don’t like being in an unfamiliar place and you don’t want to leave home”, the doctor said and she turned around to leave. Thomas heard him whisper it first. “I won’t go.” The doctor turns around, a questioning look on her face. “I WONT GO! I WONT GO TO THAT PRISON! I-I-I DON’T WANT TO EAT! I DON’T WANNA BE HEALTHY, I WANNA LOOK GOOD!” Guy-Manuel was screaming and crying now. The monitor went crazy, beeping like a broken radio to show that Guy-Manuel was under high duress.

 

Guy-Manuel grabbed Thomas and cried into his side. “PLEASE THOMAS, I DON’T WANNA GO! DON’T LET THEM TAKE ME!” Guy-Manuel sobbed into Thomas’ shoulder. Thomas wrapped his arms around his love and rubbed his hand on his back, trying to sooth him. Guy-Manuel fisted in hands in Thomas’ shirt, crying frantically. “Shush, love calm down please”, Thomas kept on telling his love who was now sobbing away. “I don’t wanna go…”, Guy-Manuel whined pathetically. The doctor looked sympathetic. “Look, you’ll thank me later. Just trust in a doctor’s decision ok? We are trained in this kind of stuff and I can clearly see that you need help”, she said before strutting out, her heels clinking on the marble floor.

 

Guy-Manuel was still crying loudly. “I don’t wanna go, Thomas, don’t let them take me away, please…” Thomas kissed Guy-Manuel’s forehead gently. “How if I went for therapy there too? Like I wouldn’t be staying in, but I go for sessions for my issues too?” Thomas offered. Guy-Manuel pulled away and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “Wha-what are you trying to say?” Thomas took in a deep breath. “What I’m saying is that we will both deal with our problems. If you stay in rehab for the bulimia, than I will go for counselling on my control and depression issues. We can go for individual counselling, then as a couple, you know, work on our relationship and all…” Thomas trailed off, hoping that Guy-Manuel understand what he was trying to say.

 

Thomas wanted this to work, he needed this to work and he was willing to do anything, including admitting that he has a problem and addressing it. Hopefully by doing that, Guy-Manuel would be compelled to agree that he has a problem with food and get help too. Guy-Manuel appeared to be thinking deeply. “You will go for therapy?” Thomas nodded. “You will come to mine?” Thomas holds Guy-Manuel’s hands. “If I’m allowed, yes.” Guy-Manuel bit his lower lip. “You won’t leave me if I’m fat?” Thomas laughs at that. “I run to the country just to talk to you, stayed in the hospital with you and would go to joint therapy for you but I’ll leave you because you grew fat? No, never”, Thomas said with absolute certainty in his voice.

 

“This past two weeks has been the worst in my life. I can’t live without you”, Thomas told his love. Guy-Manuel’s eyes widened at that. “I love you so much, I’d do anything to make us work. Please just help me here.” Guy-Manuel hung his head low. He still didn’t want to go, but how could he be stubborn after that? “Hey”, Thomas said as he lifted Guy-Manuel’s face, “I’ll make sure they don’t abuse you. I’ll still be able to see you every day. Maybe you’ll feel a little suffocated but I’ll try and get you the best room I can, ok? And I’ll get your diet plan and get Carla to cook delicious food for you and bring it over the moment you say the food’s disgusting.” Guy-Manuel smiled a little. “You’ll go right? You won’t make a fuss and make us drag you?” Thomas asked him gently. Guy-Manuel sighed. “I don’t really have a choice now, do I?” Thomas shook his head and whispered “Absolutely no.”

 

“I’ll go. I will go but you must keep your end of the promise. We’re in this together, ok?” Thomas smiled before he kissed his love passionately. “I promise with all I have, Guy-Manuel, I promise we will be better.” Guy-Manuel smiled and they embraced each other in a warm hug, a promise of a happier tomorrow bringing them back together.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 16: WHY, JUST WHY?**

Thomas listened carefully to the nurse in front of him. Thomas and Guy-Manuel’s mother were walking through the hallways to the library, the nurse in front of them chattering away. Thomas was listening intently while Guy-Manuel’s mother looked around. Guy-Manuel was still looking for some way out of this. He didn’t want to stay here, in the rehab facility and he made it very clear by begging Thomas and his mother to let him go home. The helpers had forcibly taken him away and reassured them that this was perfectly normal behavior in patients and they knew how to calm Guy-Manuel down.  After Thomas was done seeing all facilities, they went back to the common area.

 

“As you can see, we provide a very comfortable living environment here. Of course, since Mr. de Homem Christo actually doesn’t want to be here, he would not be comfortable at first. We treat our patients with outmost care. We understand that some patients are under very high emotional stress and are very sensitive. You can be rest assured that we are very well equipped with handling patients’ emotional outbursts”, the nurse informed him and Thomas nodded. Mrs. De Homem Christo sighed. “He is screaming a lot nowadays. He absolutely loathes the idea of being forced to eat, that much is clear by now. How long will it take to get him to understand that he has to eat healthily and that he is practically killing himself with his habits?” she asked, maternal concern lacing her voice.

 

“That depends, ma’am. But I can assure you that we will do our best to make him understand that he needs to eat a balanced diet with enough calories to support his body and that bulimia really isn’t the right choice. He needs to understand the full implications of what he is doing to himself. Our psychologist says that he has many repressed problems, he has been keeping it all in and this has led to the bulimia. Right now, we are concentrating on his self-esteem issues. Our doctors are confident that if we find the root of that problem, we can solve the bulimia”, the nurse explained thoroughly to the concerned mother.

 

“Ah, well. We all know that Guy-Manuel needs us to be strong for him. We need to show that we are confident that rehab will help him and he will get better. We will encourage him each step of the way, won’t we?” Thomas turns to Guy-Manuel’s mother, trying to shake her from her worries and concentrate on Guy-Manuel right now. She glanced at Thomas, took in a deep breath then closed her eyes. “It’s just so hard. I feel I could have done better as a mother. But you’re right. I must not make this about me. I’ve gotta be strong for my baby”, she said in a low, sorrowful tone. Thomas just squeezed her shoulder gently. “He’s right, ma’am. Your son keeps his problems all to himself and you have tried your best to get him to eat. There was nothing else you could have done better, I’m sure”, the nurse told the weary mother in a sympathetic tone.

 

“Can we see him now?” Thomas asked after a few moments of silence. The nurse shook her head. “I wouldn’t recommend it. He is very distressed right now. If he sees you he will just cry and demand you take him home. I would suggest that you leave him here for the night. When he came to, he looked calm but the doctor is afraid he might just act up again. He refused outright to eat anything we gave him for morning tea, so the dietician decided that if he doesn’t want to eat himself, we-uh- we might have to take, urm… desperate measures to show that we mean business and we will not let him be undernourished for long”, the nurse said, giving out the air of a very strict headmistress who takes no nonsense from her students. Thomas just nodded gravely as an image of Guy-Manuel screaming in the car earlier came to the front of his mind.

 

Guy-Manuel was all fine in the morning, he had packed his clothes and his favorite books. All the way to the rehab he had been sitting quietly in the back seat of the car and humming along to the radio. Guy-Manuel’s father had wanted to come along, afraid that his son would attempt something dramatic but seeing Guy-Manuel so compliant, he gained confidence that Guy-Manuel would not make a fuss and went to work instead. He was very, very wrong. The commotion started the moment they parked the car. Guy-Manuel refused to step down from the car. “Come on, love, please! Don’t make a scene here. We agreed on this, remember?” Thomas pleaded, he could already see the uniformed workers walking towards them.

 

“Make me”, Guy-Manuel hissed, “you are the one who needs the shrink, not me. I am a perfectly fine and sane person, you are the one with the depression and control complex who dwell in strange looking dungeons. You stay here while I see a dietician for counselling weekly.” Thomas ran a hand through his curls. ‘Where the hell is this coming from? He was never like this before’, Thomas thought warily. The uniformed handlers were right by the car. “If you need any help, we’re here. We were told that he may be problematic”, a blonde man who looked like a club bouncer said. Guy-Manuel scuttled further into the car, suddenly looking panicked. One of the uniformed handlers went to the other door and opened it. Guy-Manuel looked to his sides, breathing frantically. He was like a trapped animal in a cage, he was now surrounded from all sides with no means of escape.

 

“Why are they here?” Guy-Manuel asked, scared. “I’m not going to the asylum! I’m not crazy, I won’t let you guys stuff me in there!” The blonde guy entered the car, attempting to get close to Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel started screaming immediately. “I’M NOT CRAZY! LET ME GO, LET ME GO, LET ME GO…”, he screamed on and on until the guy got out of the car. It broke Thomas’ heart to see Guy-Manuel like this. Guy-Manuel’s mother went to the door and Thomas moved aside so that she could speak to Guy-Manuel. “Honey, this is not a mental institution. We are not saying that you are crazy, we are just saying that you need to eat. Do you think that I’ll ever let them take my baby from me?” she said in an attempt to sooth Guy-Manuel.

 

Guy-Manuel frowned. “Then why do I have to stay here? Why can’t I just come for counselling or group therapy or something like that?” Guy-Manuel asked, his voice tiny. His mother took in a deep breath. “Because dear, you will not eat if you are at home. Here they will monitor you and make sure you eat and get healthy. They only want to make you better, honey.” Guy-Manuel still looked skeptical. “Then why do I have to see the shrink? He’s my doctor, he’s gonna pump meds into me because he thinks I’m crazy”, Guy-Manuel whispered, his voice shivering with fear.

 

Thomas sighed heavily. Why Guy-Manuel was getting paranoid of everything was beyond him. He definitely needed help or he’s gonna fear everything around him for the rest of his life. After a few stressful moments, the other uniformed worker, a Hispanic one motioned for Thomas to lean in. “We have to bring him in by force. Don’t worry, this happens all the time. Patients get scared and refuse to come. At times we even have to drag them from home. We will be as gentle as possible, we won’t hurt him, we promise. We will sedate him so that he can’t harm himself”, he whispered in Thomas’ ear.

 

Thomas nodded and sighed yet again. Guy-Manuel’s mother looked at him with an exasperated look. “They have to do it”, was all he had to say to make her understand. She looked at Guy-Manuel and whispered “I’m so sorry, baby. But you don’t know what’s best for you anymore”, before waking up and walking away. “Maman? Thomas?” Guy-Manuel called out when he saw them both walk away. “MAMAN! THOMAS! MAMAN DON’T LET THEM TAKE ME, MAMAN…” Guy-Manuel cried, tears were streaming down his face now. The blond guy moved quickly into the car and grabbed Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel began screaming louder for his mother and Thomas as the two uniformed workers removed him from the car by force and sedated him. “Quiet down now, you’re gonna sleep, ok?” the blonde guy tells Guy-Manuel gently as he starts getting dizzy.

 

Guy-Manuel’s mother began crying. Thomas understood why she was crying as he felt like crying too. She took out a handkerchief and wiped her years away. “We have some admin thing to do,” she said then looked up at Thomas, “Since we are going to be in this together for a long time, shall we be properly introduced to each other?” Thomas nodded gravely. “Not how I was imagining having a formal introduction with my boyfriend’s mother but I guess the situation really is…uh…unique. I’m Thomas. Thomas Bangalter”, he said as he took his hand out of his pants pocket. The lady shook his hand firmly. “I’m Didier de Homem Christo. Nice to finally be acquaintances after a whole week of scrambling around the hospital due to Guy”, she said, making Thomas laugh slightly.

 

“Yeah, he’s being quite the attention seeker, now is he?” Thomas asked, still laughing. “Well, since he was never a rebellious teen I guess that he’s just a late bloomer. They gotta make parents worried at some point of their lives”, Didier replied easily, though there was still some heaviness in her voice. “We need to go now”, Thomas said and they both walked towards the office to get the admin work done.

 

**************

 

Guy-Manuel lay down quietly on his bed in his new room, trying to familiarize himself with the strange place and sleep. Thomas had made sure that he got a comfortable room with an attached bathroom to himself. He had a nice queen sized bed, bedside tables with lamps, a study table, a nice three seated sofa, a television and a fridge. He looked around him. The walls were a sea-blue and the curtains were grey. His bed sheets were lavender with white swirls in it, handpicked and bought by Thomas for him. The whole room was meant to have a calm and soothing effect, but that was far from what Guy-Manuel was feeling right now. He had woken up from his sleep dazed and in the comfy bed. He had hoped that it was all a nightmare and when he woke up he would be with Thomas in his childhood room. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.

 

Guy-Manuel sat up and hugged his legs. He felt so lonely and overwhelmed. He had heard so many stories of shrinks abusing their power on patients in rehab. They always said the patients were crazy. After all, crazy and having a psychological problem meant the same thing, right? And that’s what they said he had. His mind was filled with problems that caused him to hurl. Guy-Manuel pouted to himself. This felt so unfair. He admits that he didn’t like eating, he always found chewing all that food a chore and maybe, just maybe he had starved himself because he didn’t want to get fat.

 

How, just how they said that hurling was a mental thing was beyond him. Psychological problems were stuff like depression, delusion, suicidal thoughts and all those thoughts that messed with your head. He felt that his head was just fine, maybe it was not fine for a few days when he ran off from the city after finding out about Thomas’ little ‘affiliation’, but he was fine now. To him, that’s what warranted rehab. A screwed up childhood that led to ridiculous tendencies such as overworking maids then later on a scary liking for hurting others. Those slaves were the ones who were crazy. Who the hell in their sane mind would want to be tortured and suffer immense pain? He was a very normal person compared to them.

 

Earlier in the day, when he came to, he immediately panicked at being in a strange room all alone. He ran to the door and tried opening it but found that it was electronically locked. There were bars on his window. There was no way he could go anywhere, so all he could do was sit and wait. Eventually, two nurses came in with another two people. A woman in her forties and an old man. “Hello, my name is Shelby Hunning and I will be your doctor. This here is Mr. George Beafeil, your dietician and fitness trainer. Since we will all be good friends here, we encourage you to call us by our first names. The two of us will work together to make you feel better, Ok?” she said carefully, she knew she was dealing with a person who was very reluctant to be a patient in rehab. Guy-Manuel eyed them warily.

 

“Yeah?” he licked his lips nervously, “so you are my shrink? I’m not crazy.” Shelby smiled kindly at him. “Of course you are not crazy. If you were you wouldn’t be here but in a far worse place, believe me. No, you just need to solve some issues you have with yourself, that’s all.” Guy-Manuel played with the hem of his shirt. “I don’t want to get fat and ugly”, he said loudly, making his declaration. George stepped forward and held Guy-Manuel’s shoulder. “That’s my responsibility. I’m a dietician, so I will plan up a real healthy diet for you so that you get strong again. We need you to put on healthy weight, which is lean muscle. We don’t want you to gain fat as it is unhealthy.  But what’s important is that you must eat enough to sustain your metabolism”, George drawled on, trying to convince Guy-Manuel that he wasn’t going to get obese any time soon.

 

“Why is my door locked? Why can’t I walk around?” Guy-Manuel asked as he mustered up his best angry voice. It just came out as a shivered scared voice. “You can walk around after this. We were afraid you may run out and try something…funny. If you show that you aren’t attempting escape every second of you being here, we will release the door. Try to run and we lock you in again. It’s that simple”, George told him in a cheery voice that irritated Guy-Manuel. They were imposing things on him and threatening him as though he was a jailed criminal of some sort.

 

Guy-Manuel pressed his lips into a thin line. This people didn’t understand. All they wanted was to force what they thought was right on him. “I’m perfectly fine now. I like the way I am now, I just wanna maintain being here”, Guy-Manuel said stubbornly. Shelby sighed. “That’s where you’re wrong. You have issues that brought this up, I’m sure. We will have sessions twice a week so we will have plenty of time for you to talk about it”, she said gently. “I’m not mental. I’m fine and I don’t need rehab. I wanna go home now. Where is my maman and my boyfriend? They were here, they brought me here”, Guy-Manuel asked desperately.

 

This time it was one of the nurses who answered. “They went back some time ago…” Guy-Manuel gaped in disbelieve, “…we advised them to let you adjust. The faster you show that you will stay here without making a fuss, the faster they will come to visit. They have agreed only to come after we tell them you have settled in.” Guy-Manuel’s face turned splotchy, his eyes filling up with tears. Gone was his bad boy attitude. Gone was all his anger. Right now all he felt was scared and anguish. He wanted his parents and Thomas here. He didn’t want to be alone with these strangers who thought he was some problematic patient. He didn’t care about anything anymore. If he could, he wanted to turn into a baby and have his maman hold him in her arms until he slept.

 

**********

 

Guy-Manuel was woken up by a sweet looking nurse who looked very young the next morning. She told him that all patients in the rehab had to wake up at six and eat breakfast by seven. He showered and dressed in a pair of yellow jammies before sitting on his bed again, brooding. The nurse came in again, this time with a tray of food. Guy-Manuel ignored her when she placed the tray in front of him and asked him to eat. “I’ll eat if I want to”, Guy-Manuel said, still being stubborn. The nurse sighed as she put her hands on her hips. “Come on now. At least drink the clear soup and take your supplements. It’s just some liquid, you can just gulp it down in one go”, she said in a pleading tone.

 

Guy-Manuel glanced at his tray. There was some bread with jam, a bowl of clear soup and a glass of orange juice. “Only the clear soup? If I drink the clear soup, you’ll leave me alone?” Guy-Manuel asked hopefully and the nurse nodded. “Drink the clear soup in front of me then take your supplements. If you do that, I’ll leave you alone until lunch time”, she said as she pushed the tray closer to Guy-Manuel. Guy-Manuel eyed the little plastic cup containing two capsules warily. “What are those?” he asked suspiciously as he pointed to the capsules.

 

“Your supplements. They are just some multivitamins for you, since your body is so undernourished. Nothing harmful, I promise.” Satisfied, Guy-Manuel took the soup bowl to his lips and sipped on the clear soup. It didn’t taste bad, it tasted like some Asian chicken broth of some kind so he gulped in down. The nurse watched him carefully as he placed the capsules on his tongue and swallowed them with the orange juice. “So, can I sleep back now?” Guy-Manuel asked when he was done. The nurse smiled at him. “Yes you can, but you have an appointment with Dr. Shelby at ten so it can only be short nap, ok?”

 

Guy-Manuel pulled a face. “Why do I even have to see her?” he whined. The nurse carried the tray and moved it to the study table. “You have reasons why you feel the things that make you so convinced that hurling is what you need to do. She needs to find them out so that we can help you”, the nurse said nonchalantly, as though she had told the exact same line to thousands of patients before. Which she had done, actually. “I’ll leave the food here, just in case you want to eat later. We have some delicious butter cookies for morning tea today, so maybe if you don’t eat the bread you will choose to eat that”, the nurse said before walking toward the door.

 

“Wait!” Guy-Manuel said suddenly and the nurse stopped and turned back. “People who come here…” Guy-Manuel licked his lips nervously, trying to find the right question to sate the burning curiosity in him, “…the patients who come here and they follow what you guys say, meaning they follow the rules, do they, urm, you know, like get better?” The nurse smiled a confident smile back at him. “Of course they do. And they are happier when they stop torturing their bodies with no real food. Just follow as we say for a while and when you feel so much healthier, you will wonder why you didn’t stop hurling earlier. Just don’t completely rule us out before you even try, ok?” she said gently before leaving Guy-Manuel alone to think.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**CHAPTER 17: MY MELANCHOLY MEMORIES**

“So why do you think you are fat?” Shelby asked Guy-Manuel in a light tone, trying to get him to open up. Guy-Manuel tensed and clamped up immediately. They had been talking about so many things, school, music, Thomas and crazy random movies. Guy-Manuel actually felt comfortable talking to her and expressing his opinions, until she asked that question. They were talking about the mafia, discussing The Godfather and all. Eventually the topic went on to Italian food, and what it would be like to be on holiday in Italy with lots of delicious food to taste.

 

Shelby had jokingly said that she’d eat at least a thousand meals a day to try and taste all the cuisines and Guy-Manuel replied by saying that he’d not do that, seeing as his waist was flabby enough already. The moment Shelby fired the question, Guy-Manuel remembered that he was actually in a meeting with his psychiatrist and she was digging into his mind without him noticing it. “Because I am?” Guy-Manuel shrugged and tried to answer in a non-caring tone. He just came out sounding tensed.

 

Shelby nodded before jotting something down. “As I see it, you have a lack of self-confidence. You think that you are ugly, and that you are not intelligent and that people hate you if you were behaving the way you truly are within. Why is this so? Why try to be something you’re not?” Guy-Manuel took in a deep breath at that. He had been trying for so long that he forgot that he tried to maintain a mask every single day. That he had felt so disgusted by himself and that he couldn’t bear the judgment from others.

 

“I’m here to help you. You love Thomas very much, right?” Guy-Manuel nodded at that. “He’s the only person apart from your family that you’re comfortable being yourself with?” Another nod. “Why? Why decide to open up to Thomas when you’ve been hiding your whole life?” Shelby asked, making Guy-Manuel smile gently. “Thomas just crashed into my life. He didn’t bother that I was difficult or shy, he just came in and swept me of my feet. There was no time for me to react or to formulate a plan. He just…does things and I get shocked into acting naturally, no time to think up a response at all.”

 

Shelby just smiled widely at that. “Often the ones we love can make us so flustered we don’t know how to put on a façade. Thomas told me all about the argument and Rossette…” Guy-Manuel looks at her in surprise, “…he’s seeing me too, for his therapy as he promised you. So I know all about it and why you broke down. I still need the whole thing though, if you wanna get better”, Shelby said before she woke up from her chair and walked towards Guy-Manuel. She knelt down and took Guy-Manuel’s hand in hers. “You’ve suffered for so long already. Let me help you. I know you want help, and that the pain is unbearable inside. I’m here for that. Come on, let it out”, she whispered gently.

 

Guy-Manuel bit his lip. He looked at Shelby’s face. God knows he needs this, need a way out of all that pain he was feeling. Especially the one he felt when he got conflicted about Thomas. Life was just so hard at times. It didn’t hurt to spill so that it wasn’t heavy on his chest, right? “I’ll tell you from the beginning. I wanna be happy, and I wanna do this for everybody who cares for me. I…I have issues because I was bullied. My parents don’t know, nobody really knows.”

 

Shelby smiled at him, encouraging him. “Come on, go on.” Guy-Manuel took a deep breath before he ranted everything out.

 

**************

 

Guy-Manuel looked at the large school building with wary eyes. He had been to kindergarten and he enjoyed it, but this was a whole different thing. His kindergarten had been a small house with only forty students but this building was huge and had hundreds of students in it. “Let’s go in. Come on”, his mother encouraged him as she pulled his hand slightly. Inside, he was overwhelmed by the long hallway and the bright lights. He hid behind his mother. He didn’t like being here, not at all.

 

Guy-Manuel had been the eldest of two children. He loved and cared for his little brother Paul very much and had assumed the responsibility of taking care of Paul from a very young age. He was very quiet, he never talked much as his mother wanted him to keep silent and not shout all the time. He was always alone at home, Paul was too young to talk much and he never went out and played with kids his own age much so he rarely spoke. He never felt it was necessary.

 

************

 

Guy-Manuel was always alone in class and he was alone now, sitting in the back row quietly. He never knew what to talk about or what to say. Everybody else watched cartoons and read comic books while he watched cooking shows with his mother and read lullabies to Paul. Everybody else played games in the park while he always stayed at home and looked after Paul and the house. He felt out of place, like he didn’t belong there at all.

 

He was in his third year, being eight years old and already he had been labeled a social outcast. The teacher rounded the class and stopped at his desk. “De Homem Christo, please write the answer on the board”, she said in a cool, calm voice. Guy-Manuel hesitated but went anyway as he feared the teacher. He heard the people snickering as he walked to the blackboard. He was known as a coward and a scarecrow, he was such a loser he was scared of even writing something on the blackboard.

 

The teacher announced that the answer was correct and he may sit. He went back with a slight smile, happy that he got it right. When the bell rang, he went to find a quiet spot to eat. As usual, the bullies got to him first. “What you got there, mama’s boy?” “What did mommy pack for you today?” they jeered as they snatched his bag and got his food supply out. “It-It’s nothing really. Just a salad”, Guy-Manuel stuttered, he didn’t want them to steal his lunch and remain hungry. He never told his mother about the bullying, he was afraid that if she went to school and complained the bullies would just call him a crybaby and bully him even more.

 

The bullies laughed loudly. “It’s fine, we’ll take it. Your mum’s cooking is delicious. But seriously? She made you a salad?” one of them teased. Another one added what hurt Guy-Manuel the most. “Of course, his mommy wants her baby to be healthy. Given how fat he is she’d want him to lose a bit of weight.” They all laughed at that, while Guy-Manuel hung his head, ashamed of his chubby build.

 

He was always on the chubbier side, but he was never obese. That was the day that started it all. After that, they called him names, each of them referring to how fat he was. “Hey, can you even move fast enough to play dodge ball? You’re so fat you can hardly move!” or a “Damm, you’re getting heavier than a killer whale!” or a “My god, you’re actually eating that much? You should cut down, you stuff more into your face than you actually need.” Every each and one of them hurt Guy-Manuel and made him feel lower, like he was some ugly beast who wasn’t worth anything.

 

*****************

 

Guy-Manuel trudged slowly to his middle school. He hated going to school, but he needed an education. He also hated having to talk to others, he’d rather be alone as he didn’t dare to talk to anyone anyway, as his self-esteem was in shambles. He found it extremely hard to talk to others, they never bothered to talk to him anyway, so he grew more and more comfortable just being on his own. He was a constant victim of bullying. He cried at times, but that just made him seem weaker. They enjoyed seeing him weak. They PREYED on him being weak. He was the victim of a vicious food chain where he was at the bottom of all.

 

He felt so small and alone all the time. If he kept his head low, he would just escape with minor cat calling. The bullies picked on how he looked constantly. He was labeled as short, ugly and even demented. They enjoyed laughing at him when he was asked to present anything at the front of class, knowing that he was already scared to be there. “Hurry up and finish already, we can’t stand looking at your ugly face anymore!” one had shouted during a science presentation. One time, he just couldn’t take the staring anymore so he just ran out of class and took a bus home, locking himself inside and refusing to go to school the next day.

 

*************

 

“Guy-Manuel took in lungfuls of air as he approached the group of jocks at the stadium. He had been running all around the school, getting errand done for them. “Are you done? Ok, I need you to go get sodas for all of us…” the guy took out a five dollar note, “this is enough for us. None for you, and I want back the exact change or you’re dead.” Guy-Manuel tried pleading with them. “Do you really have to get the soda? I’m so tired I feel like dying”, he whined, making the jocks laugh. “Come on, dude. We’re doing you a favor. The more exercise you do, the better. The amount of fat you have, you need so much exercise, I doubt that we making you run errands will ever help. Go get the soda, ugly, it’ll be good for you”, a blond jock sneered.

 

That night Guy-Manuel looked at his face in the mirror. He felt hideous, he was not worth looking at at all. His skin was pasty and pale, his eyes a common blue, his face too soft to be that of a boy’s and his hair an ugly mess. He got so angry he shaved off all his hair in an attempt to look less like himself and angrier, maybe. He checked the results eagerly in the mirror. That’s better. He looked at his waist and how the pajama’s elastic stretched around his waist. Maybe if the problem was too much went in, if he took some out it would get better. He hurled and instantly felt more satisfied at the empty feeling in his stomach.

 

*************

 

Guy-Manuel was drinking coffee in a little café with another boy called Ed. Ed was flirting with him, he had asked Guy-Manuel out for coffee and was now showing his interest. “Look, I don’t think so it’s a great idea for us to date or anything….” Guy-Manuel started but Ed looked dejectedly at him. “Why? Why can’t we try? Is it because you don’t think I will be a good boyfriend? Or that I can’t make you happy?” Ed rained his questions, making Guy-Manuel feel guilty. He didn’t want to judge Ed, he knew how it felt like to be judged and pushed away. Against his burning shyness and desires to be left alone, he nodded gently and whispered, “I’ll try.” He’ll regret it later.

 

******************

 

Guy-Manuel and Ed were kissing passionately and Guy-Manuel felt Ed tug at his pants. Guy-Manuel pushed him away gently for what felt like the thousandth time. “I told you Ed. I’m not ready. I don’t want to yet”, Guy-Manuel told Ed, making Ed fume in anger. “Look here. I want this. I want to have sex. Everybody is doing it anyway. I get so horny at times and you’re just…” he never got the chance to finish as Guy-Manuel screamed first. “But I’m not ready!” Ed looked at him in disbelieve. “Look here, Guy. That’s what couples do. They have sex. It’s part of the relationship. As my boyfriend, I expect you to have sex with me. I want you on your hands and knees, ready for me and my dick in you”, he told Guy-Manuel with a serious look in his eyes.

 

Guy-Manuel was crushed and disappointed beyond believe. “So it’s just the sex? There’s no other reasons why you want me?” Ed looked at Guy-Manuel. “Yes it is. If you won’t have sex, I don’t wanna be with you. Nobody wants you anyway, I suggest that you just lie back and give me what I want, and we can be together and happy. Got it?” Guy-Manuel pursed his lips. This was too much, he refused to be used in that way. “Go. I don’t want to be your sex slave. Go hump somebody else”, Guy-Manuel said with an air of finality. Ed laughed before he stood up. “Well, I was desperate anyway. Under normal circumstances nobody would want to fuck your fat ass”, he said before leaving, crushing Guy-Manuel’s heart further.

 

Guy-Manuel cried so much that night. He felt so weak, he was always helpless and they preyed on him. They all played with his feelings, jerked him around as though he was nothing. He felt so depressed and frustrated. He looked into the tall mirror. He hated himself. He was all bad, there was nothing good in his looks at all for anybody to want him. Guy-Manuel carried his pajama top and looked at the flesh he had. There was too much of it, way too much. He had to make it go away. He hurled more than ever, hoping the more he hurled, the more despair would leave his body. Somehow, he felt better after hurling. He became convinced that was what he had to do. He had to hurl so that he would not be fat and ugly anymore.

 

*********

 

Going to university was the best thing that happened in Guy-Manuel’s life. He finally was away from all those bullies, he was in a new town with new people in it. Sadly, not being bullied only made Guy-Manuel’s life comfortable and did nothing for his self-confidence. He blended into the background, going about his classes and not getting too involved with anything. Pharrell and Pedro, his flat mates, were noisy and boisterous people and they refused to let Guy-Manuel sit alone in his room all the time. They became the only friends he had, and he was happy to have them. He opened up to them with much difficulty, but never indulged in venturing further than that. Until certain Thomas Bangalter forced his way through his walls.

 

***********

 

Thomas came into the room and looked for Guy-Manuel. Seeing that his love was not in his room, Thomas asked a nurse and was told that he went to the library. Thomas jogged up to the library and peeked in. he let out a relieved breath when he saw Guy-Manuel sitting on a couch, legs folded up and a story book in hand. Thomas went up to him, making him look up. Kneeling by his love, Thomas smiled nervously and said “Hello, love.” He hesitated a while before asking, “Are you still mad at me?” Guy-Manuel sighed and closed his eyes. “I was yesterday. I’m not anymore so you don’t have to be so scared that I will start shouting at you.”

 

Thomas moved up and kissed Guy-Manuel’s lips gently. “You look…surprisingly calm. I thought that we would take a very long time to get you to agree to stay after the way you resisted yesterday”, Thomas said as he looked at his love in wonder. His love looked so serene, it was hard to believe he was a screaming, crying mess just the day before. “Thank you, love. Thanks so much for trying.” Thomas took Guy-Manuel’s hand and kissed it tenderly before caressing it in a display of love.

 

“I know why you guys are doing this. After being left alone…I had nothing to do so I was forced to think. I want to try…the nurse said that people get better. I hurled to make myself feel better, so maybe I could stop o make myself better again? I don’t know, it was so easy to start hurling but so hard to stop. I guess that’s why you guys forced me to come here, you know I needed help”, Guy-Manuel said slowly, his eyes dreamy and faraway as though he was still contemplating.

 

“Don’t doubt it. You are strong, my love. You just need to find your inner strength and you will beat his thing. I feel so weak also, but I am finding my inner strength to be strong and put that monster in me to rest forever. I promise to try and be a better person, for you I can do anything”, Thomas said as he gazed lovingly at his love. Guy-Manuel looked at Thomas. Thomas did so much and cared so much for him, Thomas was always there. It was not fair to punish Thomas just because he was broken and had issues, he had issues too.

 

There was one thing Guy-Manuel decided to ask, one he asked another a long time ago. “So was it just the sex? There’s no other reasons why you wanted me at first?” Thomas scooted closer to Guy-Manuel and gazed at him curiously. “What do you mean, my love?” he asked softly, surprise lining his voice. He clearly didn’t expect this. “I mean, was it because you saw a weakling and thought I would be a person who would bend to what you wanted? Give in and just gave you everything because I was so desperate to have someone?” Thomas’ expression showed his confusion and he opened his mouth to talk, but Guy-Manuel whispered “Please. I need to know this one thing. Tell me honestly. I won’t care as long as you truly love me now.”

 

Thomas nodded then stood up. “Come with me, please”, Thomas held his hand out and Guy-Manuel took it. Thomas led him to the garden. “Do you see that old couple there?” Thomas asked and pointed towards an old couple sitting together on a bench. That particular garden was shared by the neighboring nursing center for the elderly, so old people came to the garden too. Guy-Manuel nodded then frowned, not seeing where this was going. “When I first saw you, that’s what I wanted. I wanted to have you as my own, to love and cherish and grow old with you. That was what I saw in you. My one true love”, Thomas said with such confidence that Guy-Manuel couldn’t find any space to doubt him.

 

“So there’s more you want?” Thomas looked at Guy-Manuel with intense emotions in his eyes. “So much more, my love. I want all of you and I will give you all of me. I want to be with you forever, get married, start a family, have little kids. I imagine coming back to a home with you in it, coming back into your arms after a long day, going for holidays together and arguing about which decorations to put in our home. I imagine us arguing over when our children do naughty stuff and need disciplining. I imagine us growing old and our children coming back to visit with our grandkids, Guy-Manuel. That’s what I want from you. I want you to be all mine, forever.”

 

Guy-Manuel smiled at that, his face was rosy and he looked the epitome of happiness. “Let’s pass rehab for now, ok? Then we can start planning forever”, Guy-Manuel said before tip toeing to kiss Thomas. Thomas kissed him back and they kissed sweetly, pouring all their emotions for each other into the kiss, while nature watched their once dying love blossom once more.

 

 

**CHAPTER 18: THE BEGINNING OF FOREVER**

Thomas and Guy-Manuel were laughing loudly as they chased each other with water guns. They had had a very nice picnic in the garden and were now letting go and acting childish, screaming and making a lot of noise. Guy-Manuel had been in the rehab for three months now, and his recovery was impressive. Shelby had even said that Guy-Manuel may be released to go home soon, given that he came back for weekly checkups on his health. His body had filled out slightly and he looked so healthy and rosy, Thomas was surprised that he didn’t notice that Guy-Manuel was actually ill when they first met.

 

Thomas watched Guy-Manuel’s ass and his now curvy hips as he ran about the garden, livelier than ever. If Thomas thought he was perfect before, now Guy-Manuel was just otherworldly. He was beyond perfection, he was truly an angel who had decided to grace earth with his beauty and tender soul and everywhere he went, he showered his radiant glow to the just normal humans around him. Thomas felt beyond lucky to have been given such a precious gift by the gods above, which was that Guy-Manuel actually decided to be with him, a normal, broken human.

 

Guy-Manuel flopped onto the ground, soaking wet and exhausted. Thomas sat beside him, laughing but also out of breath. “Giving up already? I thought you said you were going to make sure it rained on me”, Thomas said as he lay on his side beside Guy-Manuel and propped his head on his hand. “I can’t run anymore, I’m out of breath”, Guy-Manuel panted, his face was rosy while his eyes glinted. Thomas laughed again and moved closer to Guy-Manuel, sweeping his wet hair off his face. “You know, you’re so perfect sometimes I wonder how an angel like you fell out of the sky and found me”, Thomas whispered as he looked at Guy-Manuel in wonder.

 

Guy-Manuel fisted his hand in Thomas’ shirt collar and pulled him down, closer to Guy-Manuel. “Why wouldn’t I be with you? We were made for each other. I need you so much it hurts but still, I love you beyond anything else in this world.” Thomas rapidly drew in a breath and closed his eyes. This was the first time since the whole Rossette incident that Guy-Manuel had said that he loved Thomas. The words washed over Thomas, bringing waves of emotions that brought tears to his eyes, this realization that Guy-Manuel did love him and loved him still.

 

Thomas could feel Guy-Manuel’s breathe on his lips and he couldn’t resist drifting forward and closing that tiny distance between them. Guy-Manuel sighed and opened his mouth, letting Thomas’ tongue in. Thomas reveled in tasting Guy-Manuel once more, he had missed the sweet taste that was Guy-Manuel’s and he suddenly felt desire course through him, desire to be in Guy-Manuel’s incredible warm body again.  When they broke apart, he could feel the little tremors in Guy-Manuel’s body and one look into that deep set of blues told him that Guy-Manuel wanted him back.

 

“I want to go back to my room. Come with me?” Guy-Manuel whispered in a husky voice. Thomas nodded and they both stood up and held hands as they walked back towards the room. The moment they were in the room, Guy-Manuel pushed Thomas against the door and kissed him passionately, moving his hands all over Thomas’ body. After some time, Guy-Manuel moved to Thomas’ neck, leaving butterfly kisses, sucking and biting gently.

 

 Thomas trembled and whimpered, Guy-Manuel was being confident and he was taking charge for the first time. And hell it felt so good. Soon Thomas was a gooey mess waiting for Guy-Manuel to do whatever he wanted to do to him. Guy-Manuel took a step back and pulled Thomas’ shirt of in one swift move. Guy-Manuel was smiling like a Cheshire cat, he was feeling naughty and he was brave enough to act on his desires, and Thomas was going to comply with every bit of it.

 

Guy-Manuel walked to the bed and sat on it. Petting the bed, Guy-Manuel said in a clear commanding voice, “Strip then come lay down here, baby. I want you naked.” Thomas shivered slightly. Guy-Manuel’s voice was authoritative, but it was also gentle and calm. He knew that Thomas would obey and that he didn’t have to use force, because he was so sure that Thomas was wrapped around his little finger. Which of course, Thomas had always been.

 

Removing his jeans and boxers quickly, Thomas nearly ran to the bed and lay down, eager to please his love. Guy-Manuel smiled then moved to caress his feet gently. Then he moved his hands up gently, massaging and kneading up until he reached Thomas’ hips. Guy-Manuel squeezed Thomas’ hip bones and Thomas took in a sharp breath. He was painfully hard now, he wanted Guy-Manuel so much, and he could barely contain himself. But he didn’t want to beg yet, not so soon.

 

Guy-Manuel straddled him then started to play with Thomas’ curls with one hand. “Are you exited, honey? Are you waiting for me to do something?” Guy-Manuel said, his voice sultry. He really was the temptress and Thomas shivered again. Thomas ran his hands up and down Guy-Manuel’s thighs, feeling the smooth satin of the green pajama he was wearing. “Damm, you’re sitting on my crotch so I have no doubt that you know how exited I am right now”, Thomas replied, he wasn’t going to give in that easily.

 

Guy-Manuel smirked then tilted his head slightly, looking curiously at Thomas. Suddenly he leant down and bit Thomas’ earlobe before whispering, “Oh, I can feel it, that’s for sure. You’re having it bad, aren’t you? Do you need some relieve, darling?” Thomas sighed, Guy-Manuel was really driving him mad. His whole body was screaming at his proximity and he needed Guy-Manuel to touch him somewhere, do anything, really.

 

When Thomas refused to answer, Guy-Manuel sat up again and ran his hands down Thomas’ sides, gentle fluttering touches of his fingers that drew goose bumps on Thomas’ skin. Guy-Manuel was smiling at him seductively, he was being patient and he was going to wait it out until Thomas caved. Realizing this, Thomas gave a small whimper then pleaded, “You’re one fine temptress, you know. I want you , I NEED you to do something more, please, I’m dying here.”

 

“Shush”, Guy-Manuel whispered as he placed his index finger on Thomas’ lips. “I’ll do what I want, when I want to. But since you’re so desperate, I’ll give you a little taste, darling”, Guy-Manuel said as he traced Thomas’ ribs with a finger. Guy-Manuel moved down and spread Thomas’ legs apart before he nuzzled Thomas’ belly, then began leaving butterfly kisses there. Thomas was trembling uncontrollably now, he could smell Guy-Manuel’s body scent around him and it was driving him crazy with want. He moaned, he was truly suffering here.

 

Guy-Manuel rested his cheek against Thomas’ belly and drew lazy patters with his fingers. “Shall I kiss you better? Well, you’re in so much pain, let’s make you a little more comfortable, shall we?” Guy-Manuel said, his breath ghosting over Thomas’ navel. Thomas grunted as Guy-Manuel moved lower to grab Thomas cock. Guy-Manuel gave a small, kittenish lick to the head, before teasing the slit with his tongue slowly. Thomas bucked his hips, trying to get Guy-Manuel to take in his cock but Guy-Manuel moved his luscious lips away. “Patience, Thomas. It will all come in due time.”

 

Thomas complied, staying as still as possible while Guy-Manuel licked up and down his shaft in a teasing manner. When Guy-Manuel took Thomas into his mouth, Thomas’ mind nearly blacked out from pleasure. Guy-Manuel was bobbing his head up and down and one of his hands was wrapped firmly around the base to make up for what he couldn’t take into his mouth, while the other massaged his balls. Thomas didn’t want to buck up into Guy-Manuel’s mouth, afraid he may choke his lover, so he just moved his hand to gather Guy-Manuel’s hair and hold it so that he could see his face better. Guy-Manuel opened his eyes and the vivid fiery blue sent tremors through Thomas.

 

It was enough to send him over the edge, he had been penting up sexual frustrations for so long already and having Guy-Manuel suck him was enough to make him blow his balls. He came, hard and sudden into Guy-Manuel’s mouth and Guy-Manuel waited until he was done before swallowing it all and releasing Thomas with a smile.

 

“Comfy now, honey? Was that enough, or maybe…do you want a little more?” Guy-Manuel asked as he ran his index finger up and down Thomas’ too sensitive shaft, making Thomas tremble. “I-I want more. Take what you want, darling, I can never resist you, you know that”, Thomas said breathlessly, anticipating Guy-Manuel’s next move. Guy-Manuel smiled then reached for the bedside table to take a fresh bottle of lube and condoms. “Asked a nurse to sneak this in. Tell me, if I wanted to fuck you, would you let me? Or have you had enough because I’m not in the mood to be bottom today”, Guy-Manuel said as he began massaging Thomas’ thighs gently, his touch making Thomas harden rapidly again.

 

“Anything you want, babe. I’m yours to do as you please with”, Thomas said in a strangled voice, Guy-Manuel really was being dominant and he looked so hot doing it that Thomas had no hope, really. “Okie dokie”, Guy-Manuel chirped, giving Thomas a grin that was so childish it made Thomas smile too. Guy-Manuel broke the seal on the lube then poured some on his hands. “Bend over on the edge of the bed”, Guy-Manuel ordered, and Thomas moved, settling his stomach on the edge of the bed and fisting his hands in the sheets.

 

Guy-Manuel knelt on the floor beside him and pushed in a finger. Thomas gasped then shuddered at the intrusion. This felt so good, particularly because it was Guy-Manuel who was dominating him. He let go and relaxed as Guy-Manuel brushed his insides, looking for his sweet spot. Thomas moaned loudly when he found it and Guy-Manuel smiled as he inserted a second finger. Thomas was much more used to the sensation of impalement, so he relaxed quickly and Guy-Manuel had no problem preparing him. Soon Guy-Manuel had three fingers in and he knew Thomas was ready.

 

“Hmm, shall I make you come with my fingers or do you want my cock? I don’t know, you’re so eager I don’t think that my fingers would be enough, but I don’t mind really. I’ll just jerk off in the shower later”, Guy-Manuel whispered into Thomas’ ear, making Thomas groan. Damm, so be it. “I want you inside of me, take me Guy-Manuel, take everything from me and make me come, oh god I crave you so much”, Thomas pleaded, he was a mess and he knew he didn’t stand a chance against Guy-Manuel right now. “Ok, honey. I’ll give you heaven”, Guy-Manuel said before he yanked Thomas head up and kissed him thoroughly. Thomas swooned, his head was heady with desire and he let it show by the way he sucked on Guy-Manuel’s tongue, asking for more.

 

They broke apart and Guy-Manuel smacked his lips, making an obscene sound that went straight to Thomas’ cock. Guy-Manuel removed his pajama bottom slowly, the silk sliding off his skin. Guy-Manuel poured more lube on his hand and slicked himself up. As he opened the condom foil his expression suddenly became tender and he looked at Thomas for reassurance. Thomas smiled at him saying, “I’ll be all right, honey. You’re doing great right now.” Guy-Manuel gave him a radiant smile before he moved to place himself at Thomas hole, nudging gently at the entrance.

 

Thomas sighed as Guy-Manuel entered him slowly, the burn of being impaled, especially by Guy-Manuel was delicious. When Guy-Manuel started moving, Thomas felt heat burn in his belly, scorching his mind and capturing his senses. “Do you like this, honey? Do you like me fucking you? You’re so ready for me, ah, I wished I could record you so that you can hear yourself keening desperately, you need me so bad, you’re so desperate for me”, Guy-Manuel said, making Thomas moan even louder. Damm, confident Guy-Manuel was super-hot!

 

“Ahh, babe, you’re all I’ll ever want, ahh, fuck me like you’re gonna break me, fuck me as hard and as fast as you can, babe, I can’t get enough of you!” Thomas screamed when Guy-Manuel began hitting the sweet spot, fisting the sheets until his knuckles turned white. Guy-Manuel leaned down and bit Thomas’ shoulder gently. “You’re such a good boy for me, now aren’t you? So needy, so ready…you’ll be my good pet, now won’t you?” Thomas shivered before he answered yes, that he will be for life.

 

Suddenly, Guy-Manuel pulled out and asked Thomas to lie down back on the bed. Moving quickly, Thomas lay down on the bed and Guy-Manuel was in him again, with Thomas’ legs resting on his hips. Guy-Manuel raised one of Thomas’ legs to get a better angle before he pushed in, hard, making Thomas moan again. Guy-Manuel was in full stride now, he fucked Thomas with abandon and Thomas could feel himself near to sweet, sweet release.

 

 “Please touch me, babe. I’m so close…” Thomas choked out, he was having difficulty talking right now. Guy-Manuel grabbed Thomas shaft and stroked it in tandem with his thrusting. It was all too much for Thomas and he came quickly, his mind blacking out and seeing stars shining brightly through galaxies. Guy-Manuel came a few thrusts later and he collapsed on Thomas’ body, exhausted. Thomas held him close, wanting to let Guy-Manuel know that he was never letting him go, ever. They stayed there for a while, buzzing with pleasure and savoring the moment until eventually Guy-Manuel spoke.

 

“Wow that was awesome!” Guy-Manuel said in a happy voice as Thomas played with his hair. “Because you are awesome, my love”, Thomas said, honestly, but Guy-Manuel took it that Thomas was teasing him so he slapped him lightly with a chiding look before he pulled out and sat up. “Shall we go shower? There’s no bath tub to cuddle in but we can help wash each other clean”, Guy-Manuel offered as he unbuttoned his pajama top and tossed it aside. “Sure, babe, anything.”

 

They entered the shower and bathed together, running soap on each other’s body and caressing the lather into the skin. When they were done, Thomas dried Guy-Manuel’s hair then went to his back pack to take out a small bottle of lotion. “I put this in my bag, you know uh, because they used to bid you and I always wanted to soothe the skin if needed, you know…” Thomas trailed off, not wanting to talk about the time that Guy-Manuel used to have emotional outbursts nearly every day. During those times, they used to tie him to the bed to avoid him from harming himself and he struggled against the binds, chaffing his skin. But those times were far away and Thomas didn’t want to dwell on them, especially as Guy-Manuel was looking at him curiously now.

 

“Can I put the lotion on you? It’s fine if you don’t like it, it’s just that this lotion really makes the skin so smooth and it smells yummy”, Thomas said hopefully, he wanted the chance to touch and caress Guy-Manuel all over. Guy-Manuel pouted a while and contemplated, before moving to the bed. “Then dress me up also, I’m sleepy already”, he said as he lay down on the bed. Thomas poured the cherry blossom scented lotion onto his hands then rubbed his palms together before running his hands on Guy-Manuel’s body. Guy-Manuel hummed in pleasure as Thomas massaged his back.

 

By the time Thomas got to his legs, Guy-Manuel was already drifting off to sleep so Thomas massaged him gently, avoiding any ticklish spots as to not wake him up. When he was done, Guy-Manuel was sleeping comfortably like a baby, so Thomas just pushed up a clean pair of boxer shorts up his thighs so that he was decent in case anybody came in. he kissed Guy-Manuel’s cheek before he dressed, he was not allowed to stay for long so he had to go. He left a note with the nurse for Guy-Manuel before he left.

 

That night, Thomas couldn’t sleep. He kept on remembering Guy-Manuel and the way it felt to be fucked by him. There were so many things Guy-Manuel had yet to learn, but he was already one hell of a dominant. He did things with elegance, gentle yet strong. Thomas sighed. He was going to have so much fun with Guy-Manuel when he got home, there was so many things for them to try.

 

**************

 

Guy-Manuel put his bags into the trunk of the car quickly. He was finally allowed to go home and he wanted to get out of there as fast as possible. “Somebody’s rushing to go home”, Shelby commented as she approached him. Guy-Manuel just gave her a sheepish smile. “I’m so happy to see you so recovered. Anyway, I heard Thomas asked you to move in with him. So are you?” she asked, curiosity in her voice. Guy-Manuel shook his head. “Non, I don’t want to yet and his house is too far away from my uni. I’ll stay most weekends though, so it’ll be my second home”, he said happily.

 

Shelby laughed merrily at that. “You will come back every fortnight for your sessions, right? And he’ll follow you for sure, so you’ll at least be together every two weeks once”, Shelby said gently as Guy-Manuel’s dad came over. “We’re all set to go”, he said, making Guy-Manuel smile wider. Shelby hugged him gently, a goodbye hug. “Take care of yourself OK? I’ll see you in two weeks”, she whispered as she tapped his shoulder.

 

Guy-Manuel sat in the car and Shelby waved goodbye as the car drove away. Guy-Manuel was elated, he felt more confident and braver to take on the world than he ever had in his life. As he sat and watched the countryside, he felt excited about going back to the city. He was awesome, he was unstoppable, he had the force of a hurricane and he was taking his life into his own hands. He was going to soak it in and conquer it all, and he was going to do it while looking elegant and demure. He was going to conquer it all, and nobody’s ever gonna bring him down again. Never again.


End file.
